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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to homeschool for a year just for a new house

187 replies

SenoritaFajita · 28/02/2023 11:56

We’ve fallen for a new build which ticks almost all our boxes, and will be ready to move into this summer. We’d look to live here for at least the next 15 years.

The house is close to the office for both DH and I (we alternate wfh days) and also to DD1’s school.

However… DD2 will be starting Y6 in September and it wouldn’t be feasible for us to drive from the new house to her current school (total 2 hours driving back and forth each day).

As long as her 11+ results are as predicted, DD2 should be going to the same secondary school as DD1.

I don’t want her to start a new school in Y6 so I’m considering pulling her out of school altogether and homeschooling for the final year. Realistically this would mean Oak Academy for the 3 days I’m working, then I have 2 days off where we could do more “fun” and interactive learning.

She herself has said she wouldn’t mind missing out on her residential, final year performance and prom… but will she regret this? WWYD?

OP posts:
Tinkerbyebye · 28/02/2023 22:44

Move house and put her in the new school

home schooling won’t work if you are working

pleasehelpwi3 · 28/02/2023 23:06

PennyRa · 28/02/2023 21:33

You certainly can do all those things and more through home ed

Show quote history

Yes, I don't doubt you can as an adult.
But the added value of doing it in a classroom surrounded by other children of the same age who will be going through the same thing and have the same hopes and fears and anxieties is invaluable and can't be reproduced at home, even with a well meaning and kind adult.

PennyRa · 28/02/2023 23:15

pleasehelpwi3 · 28/02/2023 23:06

Yes, I don't doubt you can as an adult.
But the added value of doing it in a classroom surrounded by other children of the same age who will be going through the same thing and have the same hopes and fears and anxieties is invaluable and can't be reproduced at home, even with a well meaning and kind adult.

Show quote history

Do you think home ed communities are filled with 50 adults and one child? Or do you think there are at least as many children?

AmandaJonah · 28/02/2023 23:21

Most Home Ed Groups have children of different ages. And by the time you get to teenage years, there are usually very few other teenagers.

PennyRa · 28/02/2023 23:34

AmandaJonah · 28/02/2023 23:21

Most Home Ed Groups have children of different ages. And by the time you get to teenage years, there are usually very few other teenagers.

There are teen groups

AmandaJonah · 01/03/2023 00:53

Really? I have never come across them. Generally much more parents home school at primary level and the older the kids get, the more likely they are in school or college IME.

newfriend05 · 01/03/2023 02:22

Honestly OP travelling 30mins each way to school is nothing!!! I had to get my two on a bus or we walked the mile and half .. think your've been spoiled .. actually thinking it's ridiculous you were going to pull your child out of school for that

Northernlassie1974 · 01/03/2023 07:12

We’ve moved temporarily waiting for a new build. Drive to get the kids to school was 30-40 mins each way depending on traffic. In all honesty, it was fine! I really don’t see why you can’t do both for the sake of a dream house and no disruption to education. We changed our routine, had cereal bars and fruit in the car for breakfast to save some time and brought a snack and drink for drive home. It actually was painless in the end, you know it’s not forever and we quite enjoyed a good old chat and singalong in the car together!

You really can have both imo! residential and prom are rites of passages, sue may think she won’t care but they’re just experiences they’ll remember forever and can only have once.

Good luck!

DancingDaughter50 · 01/03/2023 07:54

Drive her

CaptainNelson · 01/03/2023 09:34

@SenoritaFajita This isn't dissimilar to the situation we were in when we moved. IT was the middle of the school year, though, so only 6 months driving, but a similar distance to you. DS2 was in Y6. We left him (and his siblings) at their old schools and I drove them. Sometimes I came straight home (I'm self employed, so was WFH), and sometimes I went to the nearest town and worked there for the day. DS2 was relatively happy in his primary (always struggled a bit in school), and he participated in all the end of primary events. The move to the (new) local secondary wasn't easy, but from the sound of it your DD's move will be more straightforward as there'll be more children from different primaries. I would suck up the driving for a year, honestly. It's tiring, but it's doable. Good luck.

lieselotte · 01/03/2023 11:56

redspottedmug · 28/02/2023 12:52

Suck up the driving. We moved at the start of Year 13 for various reasons, and DC agreed providing they could stay at their current 6th form. It meant 9 months of DH and I doing work arounds to accommodate this.
In a nutshell, it wasn't their decision to move, there was no benefit to them and therefore as parents we had to make it as stress-free as possible for the DC.

I think it's very different for Y13.

A Y6 child can go to any school (that is decent).

NeedToKnowMoreThanThis · 01/03/2023 15:05

I'm not sure if this helps you, but we spend over 2 hours a day driving our son to school. I do the early morning trip (which takes longest), and then my DW does the afternoon pickup. Its hard work, but holidays and half term roll around pretty quickly, and you get used to the routine. Its a long day for our son, but this is a much better option for him than home schooling (which they all had to do during Covid times, but was not much fun).

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