Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do I need to go straight for IVF?

74 replies

onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 21:34

Long story short..
I have one blocked fallopian tube and one healthy clear one.

Since I had pelvic surgery where I was diagnosed with one tubal blockage I have been told natural conception is highly likely - but I'm struggling to believe this. (Prior to this surgery I wouldn't have got pregnant anyway due to the location of my ovaries - this has now been sorted - had been trying over a year).

I'm on cycle 4 since the surgery (which I know sounds like early days) but I'm really dubious that this won't happen naturally.

Am I being unreasonable - I'm so scared I won't get pregnant naturally. My doctor has also wrote in my notes that I'm not to be referred for nhs ivf until at least a year of trying after my surgery!

Should I go straight for (private) IVF or is natural conception definitely a strong possibility? 😣

OP posts:
Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 22:58

@Rainbowincoming

He did say there was no fluid in that tube. This is what we were concerned about but there wasn't any. Does that sound ok? I had a scan which suggested fluid but it was actually an ovarian cyst. Due to the location of my ovaries it looked like it was fluid in my tube but it was from the cyst 😖

Thank you so much for your well wishes and help 😘

OP posts:
Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 23:02

@ConfusedNT

No I don't - how do I find this out? I assumed this was something I'd be told when I got referred for nhs ivf. I have avoided over researching ivf due to my surgeons optimism but I'm just doubting him now :(

I'm petrified of IVF, not going to lie. It is the last thing I want to go for. However, my parents are much older parents than others my age and this just makes me not want to wait any longer. I would struggle to afford private - id definitely need a loan but I just don't want to wait too long and if I did manage to get pregnant for my child not to get to have much time with its grandparents.

I really want to have patience and hopefully it will happen naturally, I'm just so worried that the blocked tube is hindering everything else and it just won't happen :( x

OP posts:
Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 23:04

@Annab1983

I'm so sorry for your loss - I'm pleased you did get your baby naturally.

Do you know why your tube was blocked by any chance? My surgeon thinks mine could be congenital as there isn't an obvious cause (another thing that's confused the life out of me!!)

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 26/02/2023 23:18

31 is young as in you do have time

I would leave it a year ttc.

You may have to wait 2yrs before nhs ivf

Ask Surgery what their time limit is

All Postcodes are diff

Ivf is mentally emotionally physically and if private financially demanding

It is Awful Paying back a loan /making credit card payments when it has failed

So as hard as it is at the moment - give it time

ConfusedNT · 26/02/2023 23:21

onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 23:02

@ConfusedNT

No I don't - how do I find this out? I assumed this was something I'd be told when I got referred for nhs ivf. I have avoided over researching ivf due to my surgeons optimism but I'm just doubting him now :(

I'm petrified of IVF, not going to lie. It is the last thing I want to go for. However, my parents are much older parents than others my age and this just makes me not want to wait any longer. I would struggle to afford private - id definitely need a loan but I just don't want to wait too long and if I did manage to get pregnant for my child not to get to have much time with its grandparents.

I really want to have patience and hopefully it will happen naturally, I'm just so worried that the blocked tube is hindering everything else and it just won't happen :( x

It's about 8 years ago I went through this so it might be more standardised now, but I'm pretty sure I just put in IvF and my NHS trust into Google and all sorts of information came up

I understand what you mean about older parents, I was in the same position so I totally get that. But if I understand it correctly you are talking about 8 months left of trying before your 12 months is up?

And then a cycle of IVF takes around a month as i remember so even if you need multiple cycles it's not that lengthy

So unless you have really long waiting lists your parents age shouldn't make that much of a difference

RogueV · 26/02/2023 23:23

I have one blocked tube and achieved 3 pregnancies, one took 18 months, second 9 months and the third 2 months

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 23:34

@RogueV

Thank you - interesting how the time it took decreased!

OP posts:
Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 23:36

@ConfusedNT

Thank you, I'm glad you understand what I mean regarding my parents age too! It's always hard explaining this to those with 'younger' parents!

I'm going to hold off going for ivf atm - everyone has been so helpful on here so I don't feel quite as negative as I did before
I posted!

💖💖

OP posts:
Fromwetome · 26/02/2023 23:41

Post in the fertility threads please for your own sanity, some of these replies are so incorrect.

I'm saying this as someone who has endometriosis and nil fertility after IVF. A lot of these comments are very wrong.

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 23:52

@Fromwetome

Which comments are wrong?

OP posts:
ConfusedNT · 27/02/2023 00:04

onlygetitinmynightdress · 26/02/2023 23:36

@ConfusedNT

Thank you, I'm glad you understand what I mean regarding my parents age too! It's always hard explaining this to those with 'younger' parents!

I'm going to hold off going for ivf atm - everyone has been so helpful on here so I don't feel quite as negative as I did before
I posted!

💖💖

It still might be worth researching the wait times for the fertility treatment. I found once I got to the point of treatment the whole thing only took a few months

But it took me about a year to get to that point, but on the other hand I went into it not knowing what was wrong with me so most of that time was taken up waiting for diagnostic tests as I ended up needing MrIs and all sorts. In your case you might get there a lot quicker

I second the suggestion to post in infertility, you might get someone under the same NHS trust as you with a much better idea of the wait times. My experience is so out of date now that it might be irrelevant

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 00:05

@ConfusedNT

Thank you. I'll repost this in infertility - I felt selfish putting this in there as I've not necessarily been diagnosed as infertile (potentially yet) xx

OP posts:
ConfusedNT · 27/02/2023 00:08

onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 00:05

@ConfusedNT

Thank you. I'll repost this in infertility - I felt selfish putting this in there as I've not necessarily been diagnosed as infertile (potentially yet) xx

I found the infertility board extremely supportive when I needed to use it and I don't think anyone would think you are selfish for posting there

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 16:16

I've reposted in infertility but only had 1 reply 😔

OP posts:
spidereggs · 27/02/2023 21:12

@onlygetitinmynightdress which area are you and we can work out number of cycles.

You are young and my instinct would be give it twelve months.

I had multiple losses, multiple failed ivf. Discharged, done, now have three. But the trauma from that has never left me

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 21:13

@spidereggs

Thank you so much that's so kind of you. 😭

I'm in the midlands.

I'm panicking now about the fact that I have still got the blocked tube - it definitely wasn't hydrosalpinx but I'm unsure as to why it could leak liquid during ivf?! Is this just an ivf thing?

OP posts:
spidereggs · 27/02/2023 21:18

Have you had an HSG

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 21:21

@spidereggs

Yes during my laparoscopy x

OP posts:
Lcb123 · 27/02/2023 21:24

At 31 I’d give it 1-2 years, and make every effort to not stress, stress has such a negative effect on the body. I would stop tracking and just keep having very regular sex. IVF is so invasive, I’d only have as last resort

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 21:25

@Lcb123

Thank you. I'm trying so hard to keep my stress levels down. I just feel like I'm reading conflicting advice everywhere I turn and it's hard to know what's best for my situation x

OP posts:
spidereggs · 27/02/2023 21:33

Would need more postcode specific area. East Midlands one course. According to Google.

You could pay privately for a consultation. We did this at Newcastle after being discharged from Edinburgh NHS .

We found it helpful to have the time to talk over everything at length with someone.

At that time we were referred to donor list.

I think it was about two hundred but explained things in so much detail.

I would say when I then fell naturally Edinburgh were wonderful and the NHS care was second to none.

The original consultants both took over my care.

ConfusedNT · 27/02/2023 21:36

onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 21:13

@spidereggs

Thank you so much that's so kind of you. 😭

I'm in the midlands.

I'm panicking now about the fact that I have still got the blocked tube - it definitely wasn't hydrosalpinx but I'm unsure as to why it could leak liquid during ivf?! Is this just an ivf thing?

My best friend used midland fertility a few years ago and they were fabulous! I can't help you with how many rounds free you get from the NHS there because her partner already had a child so she had to go straight to private, but they were excellent and she always recommends them

Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 21:46

@spidereggs

Sorry yes it is East Midlands!

One round :(

If I did make an appointment with a private service would this mean I couldn't then go for nhs ivf?

Sorry for my never ending questions

OP posts:
Original poster
onlygetitinmynightdress · 27/02/2023 21:46

@ConfusedNT

Thank you so much, I'm going to look into them whilst I try and hold off at least a few more months xx

OP posts:
DESGUSTING · 28/02/2023 08:40

One round, includes any frozen transfers op.

It's basically one round of egg collection.