Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Mum being targeted because of her age

55 replies

missb10 · 26/02/2023 00:51

My Mum is in her 80s and last week had someone at her house saying he had been cleaning the moss off her roof while she was out and wanted to be paid. He said that he worked for the company who put the tiles on her roof a few years ago. Well how are we supposed to know? She refused to pay him and her neighbours and I agreed that she did the right thing. The thing is, she is worried now that he will come back. She intends to refuse to pay, but she is worried. I would be concerned about this if it happened to me, but even more so because she is an old lady living on her own. Can people on here stick up for her?

OP posts:

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 26/02/2023 11:35

It's a scam. Definitely your mum did the right thing in refusing to pay for a service she hadn't booked. I'd doubt if any work had actually been done.
If you can get a ring doorbell that sends through to your phone, that might give both of you some peace of mind x

Guis · 26/02/2023 11:53

Well why would anyone say other than she did the right thing ?
Unless you are concerned she did invite him to clear moss on her roof and has forgotten. But from all you say that seems most unlikely.

She could call the local parish council to let them know there is a problem person around. They in turn might be able to communicate to others who could keep an eye locally for similar activity.

Btjdkfnn · 26/02/2023 11:58

People target the elderly massively. My mil and fil were targeted. They were previously savvy but trusted nice pleasant con artist type men. They were targeted with home improvements and also a phone banking scam in which they nearly lost £2000.

CaveMum · 26/02/2023 12:08

Hopefully this was just an opportunistic crime and he won’t be back again - if she had paid him something he’d be more likely to come back and try and get more money out of her.

Report to police and local parish council. If there is a local Facebook page post a warning on there.

A Ring doorbell that you have access to is a good idea, as is Power of Attorney so that you can keep an eye on her financial affairs.

When we took on Power of Attorney for my MIL’s financial affairs we discovered she was paying out about £150 per month in dodgy insurance she’d been talked into taking out by cold callers (cover for her TV, washing machine, etc that was totally unnecessary).

FictionalCharacter · 26/02/2023 12:11

Casilero · 26/02/2023 03:32

You need to report this to the police. I would also suggest that (and I mean this kindly) that if your mother lacks capacity you need to get power of attorney. There's loads of scam artists out there and I've seen my mother's elderly friends fall foul of these people. I also work with the elderly and I'm very regularly getting involved in a service user who's been scammed in one way or another. You need to take control of this situation.

There’s nothing here to suggest that her mother lacks capacity. Someone came to her door and tried to scam her, she refused to pay them. She’s just worried that they’ll come back. That’s all completely normal.

Streamside · 26/02/2023 12:14

I work as a crime prevention officer within a local authority. I'd recommend that you speak with your local police and request a visit from the local crime prevention officer or neighborhood police officer.
Look at your mother's home in the way a criminal would, is there good natural surveillance, can you slow down their access to her door via a closed gate etc. Does the exterior of the house make it obvious that an old person lives there, it must have been obvious to this caller.
A more general point about scam artists and probably more applicable to telephone scams is that many older people now have a second sacrificial type of card account with a maximum of a few hundred pounds on it.
Don't allow this to take over your mother's life, deal with it sensibly and calmly.

Englishash · 26/02/2023 12:17

Door chain. Deadbolt. Spyhole. Ring doorbell on your phone.

Colgatetoothpaste · 26/02/2023 12:26

I'd report to the police, it is probably just an optunistic crime (newer roofs can be very obvious) but the man somehow must have been able to work out an elderly person lives there. Or It may be an ex-employee of the company who fitted the roof and they may have an inclining of who it is.

I'd also mention it on your mum's local FB group. 'Nottingham knockers' are a problem in my area and as soon as someone knows they're in the area there will be a mention on the group. Gives family members a chance to warn elderly/vulnerable relatives.

ChickenDhansak82 · 26/02/2023 12:28

Absolutely she should not pay, and if they return she should call the police.

I think she should perhaps contact 101 police anyway and let them know what happened as they are no doubt trying this with others in the area to scam some money.

NeedWineNow · 26/02/2023 12:31

My mum is elderly and lives on her own. We've made sure she's got a chain on her door and my brother is going to install a Ring doorbell.

She gets a lot of telephone calls and if she suspects it is a scam she tells them that, because of problems in the past, her line is being continually monitored by the police and all calls are being recorded. I've used the same script when we've had calls at home and it gets rid of them surprisingly quickly! My brother is a copper and he told her what to say.

Justmeandthedog1 · 26/02/2023 12:31

Report to the police. It’s a well known scam, lots of variation on it. If anyone comes to her house she tells them to send an invoice as her daughter/son who is a police officer pays all her bills.

TicketEnforcement · 26/02/2023 12:32

Buy
beware of huge dog stickers

Neighbourhood watch stickers

Anti scammer stickers/police aware

For doors & windows

FredaFox · 26/02/2023 12:39

Fromwetome · 26/02/2023 02:00

OP ring doorbell is the best bet, the notifications can come up on your phone too, so that any time someone walks past or comes up to your mums door you can check who it is. My boss does this at his 84yr old mums house. He was able to tell roofing scammers to piss off very quickly!

I have the ring app on my 79 year old mums home, she's housebound with poor mobility so she's slow walking to the door plus I like the safety that she's not opening her door to strangers
It gives peace of mind I can check on her and speak to people at the door
She has started to use the speaker herself and speak to people (it took a while for her to figure it out)
I really recommend it

Smugglers · 26/02/2023 12:41

She totally did the right thing

2bazookas · 26/02/2023 12:49

You should notify her local police (on her behalf) because she won't be the only vulnerable person targeted in her area; and someone will have seen their vehicle or caught it on local security cams. Local Neighbourhood Watch would also want to know so they can spread the warning.

You might want to set her up with a doorbell camera to record doorstep conmen.

FirstnameSuesecondnamePerb · 26/02/2023 12:50

My dmum is in sheltered accomodation now but she just said "My son deals with this, I have no access to money, but you can have his number if you like".

Cherrysoup · 26/02/2023 12:55

Police! Of course she did the right thing. Scammers target older people thinking they’ll just pay up.

Similar happened to my mil, some blokes cleaned her drive, charged her a fortune and got scared off when me and my Dh drove up and told them we had moved in. DH is quite used to dealing with scammers.

DuplicateUserName · 26/02/2023 12:57

What have the police said about it OP?

And has it not reassured your mum?

linelgreen · 26/02/2023 13:12

We got my elderly Mother into the habit of telling any tradesmen that called that she only rented the property and so they would need to speak to her landlord about any work needing doing. This tradesmen would then go away as they knew she was not responsible for maintenance issues. This worked really well.

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 26/02/2023 13:16

FirstnameSuesecondnamePerb · 26/02/2023 12:50

My dmum is in sheltered accomodation now but she just said "My son deals with this, I have no access to money, but you can have his number if you like".

This is brilliant, I might have to borrow this approach.

BloodyThursday · 26/02/2023 13:17

Definitely report to the police. Depending on the force they may even offer to put a ring doorbell on for her for reduced cost or free.

ScrantonDunderMifflin · 26/02/2023 13:19

Crazy. If it happens again probably best to say 'why don't we call the police to let them help settle this and find out why you're on my property without permission?'. I think the man would ran off.

TitoMojito · 26/02/2023 13:26

Oh people like this are so gross. I tell them I'm a tenant and they need to take it up with my landlord. I am, of course, not a tenant and I own my home but they are scammers and can fuck off.

helpfulperson · 26/02/2023 13:27

My mums next door neighbours have kindly said that if anyone comes to the door with anything and she is at all unsure she is to say to them that she will need to get the person who deals with these things so wait there and to shut the door and give them a ring and they'll pop round. This gives her confidence that if it is something genuine they will come round and help her deal with it.

Kedece2410 · 26/02/2023 16:40

BloodyThursday · 26/02/2023 13:17

Definitely report to the police. Depending on the force they may even offer to put a ring doorbell on for her for reduced cost or free.

😮 what Force does that

Flip

1 2 3