AIBU To Think That The Plots Of The Chalet School Books Were Really Improbable

[TheShellBeach]

.................................such as Prince Cosimo, the endless kidnappings, all the train crashes/bus crashes/car crashes/plane crashes/boat sinkings hang on a minute, were there any boat sinkings

Okay, I've just remembered that there were a couple of near misses with boats when the CS was on the island. Joey was nearly flung overboard once (a missed opportunity for EBD to get rid of her IMO) and there were probably others.

Anyway - all aboard and ahoy there.

I said this on the other thread but I got judgey about Captain Humphreys going off and having a climbing accident and leaving Baby Robin an orphan.

It is possible to get far too invested in these books :)

Yes, the return is hilariously underplayed, in a world where Joey’s gift of some jam has the whole school ‘given their heads’ to clap and cheer en masse as if they’ve just won an Olympics bid! You’d think a CS girl’s father returning from a space flight would rate a mild note of pride.

Or is it that having a CS girl with the first British astronaut father (actually, no idea when the first Brit went into space) might make the school’s official famous old girl look a bit passé for just writing children’s books, having lots of babies and wearing breezy earphones?😀

Actually, I do wonder what EBD was thinking with Prof Richardson — presumably he had a university post, so why on earth was he apparently building rockets solo up a mountain in the Tiernsee? Was EBD under the impression he just needed somewhere quiet and high up, and could carry everything he needed in a backpack or something?

I think he was just taking observations at the Tiernsee. It was when he heard about someone else building a rocket that he dumped his kids on Joey and went haring off.

I expect he was on sabbatical. I've been assuming that the total lack of attention paid to his failed space flight was a grown-up version of the 'don't make a fuss of the child who's in San after falling through the ice/drowning/being kidnapped so she won't feel special' technique beloved of Matron and Miss Annersley.

I’d forgotten about the first space trip.

Perhaps because it was so underplayed. Maybe they thought that if everyone politely ignored the first trip, Prof. Richardson wouldn’t do it again?

".................................a grown-up version of the 'don't make a fuss of the child who's in San after falling through the ice/drowning/being kidnapped so she won't feel special' technique beloved of Matron and Miss Annersley"

Unless the child happens to be Joey Bettany, of course.
Then we can have whole chapters written about her family coming to visit and pray, not to mention the entire school collapsing in misery and grief and the school baby being persuaded to sing The Red Sarafan eight times in a row because Matey's medicine hasn't worked

Captain Humphreys isn’t really comparable to Professor Richardson though.

Climbing’s an extreme sport, true, but most people who go on climbing holidays return home in one piece.
Unless Captain Humphreys was attempting something along the lines of conquering Everest, he’d have had a reasonable expectation of returning home safely.

Professor Richardson, on the other hand - him and some mates have basically built a rocket in someone’s back garden, and taken it on a test drive. To space.
That’s insanely risky. He’s got to know that there’s a high chance his children will be orphaned. Surviving the first space trip’s probably a minor miracle.

I sort of had the impression that the first space trip just fell in the sea or something rather than actually getting into space.

But wouldn't Professor Richardson have drowned in that case, and been therefore unavailable for a second attempt?

Will have to go back and find out why I think that now - vague half memory of someone saying he was lucky not to have drowned. But I haven't been reading very carefully.

Tears welled up in Fiona's dark eyes."Inteet, you are fery, fery kind," she faltered. "We will try to be happy here."

Robin slipped an arm round the thin shoulders, and bent and kissed her.
"You will be. Everyone is - or if they're not, it's their own fault."

(Highland Twins)

So there we have it. If you don't like living at Joey's house, or if you hate the Chalet School, it's your own fault, and you'll be made aware of this before you have the temerity to complain.

I think there was a theory that Captain Humphreys was really an undercover agent working for Jem / MI5, and actually on a mission rather than a climbing holiday…

And on the subject of the Highland Twins, I am puzzled by EBD's representation of Hebridean Islanders in the book.

I live in the West Coast of Scotland and there are a lot of native Gaelic speakers here, (and I can speak a little myself), but the Gaelic is not spoken the way EBD has Flora, Fiona and Shiena speak. And that's another bugbear. Native speakers always refer to "the" Gaelic, not just "Gaelic".

Nobody tells the twins that they pronounce the word "Gaelic" wrong, either. However, English people generally complain that the word should be pronounced "Gaylic" (as the Irish do), and not "Gaa-lic" (which is how the Scots pronounce it).

I also cannot imagine anyone, even in the 1940s, going around dressed in kilts with Glengarry hats.

The Highland twins were so music hall Scottish, I’m amazed they weren’t arrested as obvious Nazi spies.

Yes indeed.
But the actual spy, Gertud, was not recognised as such.

I thought it was common practice to plan for a sea / ocean landing for returning spacecraft?

There's climbing accidents that you wouldn't expect and ones that really could be avoided and we don't know what the Captain was doing.

I remember my Uncle used to do lots of climbing and things like that. It stopped when he went off to do a climb and when he came back, he mentioned casually to my Aunt that one of the party had died during the climb. When she expressed horror he and said "that climb has a 1 in 8 deaths and there were 10 of us so it was better than expected." It wasn't so much the death rate so much of his casual acceptance that she was shaken by. I don't think he did another dangerous one after that.

But one of my favourite theories is the Captain is actually a Russian spy. It explains him speaking Russian and having to go and leave Robin behind. I think it does have some plausibility.

Despite the fact that her cunning disguise consisted of changing her name from Gertrud Becker to Gertrude Beck, she speaks English with a German intonation, has a ‘hard’ mouth, and shows up suddenly mid-term displaying a suspicious interest in German and Austrian past pupils!

My mother was a keen climber in the 50s and lost a boyfriend and a fiancé. I think it was accepted by those in the climbing community that it was horribly risky. I think it’s madness myself.

I always saw Prof Richardson as the mad scientist trope in action. Not that different to the people who do the Bognor Birdman competition now. I think it’s quite an entertaining way to get her parents out of the way so she can discover her true Chaletian roots!

Now on "Changes" and totally confused by the different forms. Why is 10-year-old Con Maynard in the same form as 13-year-old Emerence Hope? Also, how come the triplets get to go to the Swiss School when it doesn't take girls under 12? After all, Joey was quite happy to send the boys to schools in England so it can't be because she wants her entire brood with her at the Platz....mind you, the boys have always played second fiddle to the girls in that family.

The forms were all jumbled up by ability rather than just age, the triplets are always shown as a bit ahead (hence the invention of Inter V!) and Emerence not very academic. Sounds like a recipe for chaos though.

I've been rereading Exile and just realised Bruno Von Ahlen (Frieda's eventual husband) starts out as a San doctor. But later on he works for a bank in Basel! EBD continuity error, or could one of her beloved doctors have actually quit medicine?!

Does anyone know why the girls can't walk out of prayers without music playing? And why the music teacher can't just play the music but always has to 'crash into' whatever the song is?

When we left assembly, the music teacher always played the piano. He often played very very loud!!!

At primary school we always walked in and out to music.

EBD mentioned in one of her newsletters, 'After the war Bruno von Ahlen had to take what work he could obtain and this was the best choice'