To have said this at the riding school?

[TigeToo]

I’ve been doing horse riding lessons for around 6 months now (after on and off lessons when I was younger). I was paired up with a lovely but very sedate cob called Frank. It’s a mission to get Frank to do anything other than a very slow half hearted trot. It was ok at first as I needed a slow steady horse to build my confidence up but now it’s just frustrating. I’m meant to be learning how to canter but I can’t get Frank to canter. The instructor shouts “give him a kick” which I do but he doesn’t give a shit. The instructor will then laugh and call him a lazy bones or something. Occasionally she’ll run up behind him doing a weird noise which might make him canter for 3 steps but then he’ll stop again.
Last week I arrived at the stables and was told “Frank isn’t available so I’ve got Toby out for you, he’s a bit more forward, are you ok with that?”

Well Toby was amazing! Still slow and steady but up for a slow canter when requested. He was perfect!! I had an amazing lesson and finally felt like I was getting somewhere (with lots of cantering!!)

At the end of the lesson I asked if I could have Toby again on my next lesson. She said that was fine and wrote his name next to mine in the booking book.

So imagine my horror when I turn up today and see Frank stood waiting for me. I said “I’m meant to be on Toby today” and she said “oh, sorry he’s not available this week”. So I said “As lovely as Frank is I really want to learn to canter now, is there any other horse available?” And she got pissed off and said “no, I’ve got Frank ready now”.

So I took Frank into the school. Absolutely pointless, walking around so slow that he literally stopped a few times. Managed a slow trot, no chance I was getting anything else out of him.

So when it came to booking next weeks lesson I said “can you put me down for a horse I can learn to canter with” and she said “I can try but Frank is the best horse for you really due to your height, weight and ability” (I’m 5ft 10in, 10.7stone). They have a massive yard full of horses. I have another friend who goes and has said she won’t ride Frank or Toby as they’re too difficult to work with.

I didn’t book at the time but after speaking to friend I rang them just now and asked if I could book in with Blaze, Pepsi or Toby next week. They said “yes, I’ll put them on as well as Frank”. I said “No, not Frank”. She got very defensive and said there were no guarantees that it won’t be Frank if he’s the only one available so I said I won’t bother then.

The lessons are expensive and I feel like the’re taking the piss out of me.

You should do what I did in that situation, get a pony on loan maybe one or two days a week and teach him yourself. I taught both my daughters the basics on a pony we loaned 2 days a week, and then they progressed to a pony we had full time and I paid for lessons.

Because it is not correct! The horse part is superfluous. No need to qualify "riding". Not too many elephants or camels in GB.

@Postapocalypticcowgirl

Accidents or not nobody pays what sounds like a largish stable for a "lesson" that consists of 60 minutes of sitting on a horse trying to force it to move

Not necessarily. But you may not know that if you're a horsey person without much direct experience of how unhorsey people ride. Some riding school ponies are properly hardened. Sounds like the op could not possibly give the aids strongly enough.

Frank needs someone with a hot bottom (stop sniggering at the back) to give him a bit of spirit bless him, pref out on a hack.

but you need a pony with good start and stop buttons to learn to ride on, people confuse a school master with one that needs a rocket up it’s bum to shift out of first gear

Quite a lot of bikes though!

FWIW I agree.

But for some novice riders, if you tell them to squeeze or put their leg on, or even give a nudge with e.g. the outside leg behind the girth etc, their aid will be so soft the horse literally won't notice it- I've tested it by asking them to squeeze my hand etc, and honestly the leg aid was barely noticeable.

Sometimes you have to tell someone to kick to get them to give an aid the horse will actually feel!

My usual phrase was "legs on" etc, but occasionally I would ask a rider to give their horse/pony a kick because it was the only way they would give an aid the horse would actually feel!

So I think it is a bit dependent on context!

I stopped riding even though it’s my biggest love because most riding schools still think it’s acceptable to ask you to kick or whip a horse. Would you do that to any other animal? It’s disgusting and I wouldn’t go back.

I'm a rider and a trainer and you are absolutely not being unreasonable. You don't learn by having to constantly boot a horse in the ribs, and actually no horse or pony deserves that. Good riding schools make sure their horses and ponies are schooled properly between teaching, so that they are able to respond to proper leg and hand aids. It's not good riding to be constantly kicking, they shouldn't be teaching that. Good schools teach that whips are for subtle reinforcement of other aids, not hitting...
It sounds like poor Frank is either bored, has a physical problem, or both.

Maybe try some lessons at another school?

That's valid and OP is obviously welcome to move stables.

But as I said in my previous post, serious accidents close riding stables now. And when I say serious, I mean things like a broken arm, not life changing.

So some stables have become overly cautious.

OP is obviously unhappy with her lessons on the horse provided. The stables seem to have basically told her they won't provide another horse for her to ride without really going into why- possibly because they don't want to offend.

They'd probably rather lose her custom than have her have a serious accident on another horse.

That's been my experience too.

I sometimes rode a lovely horse who was a very lazy trotter. And I was reasonably experienced, but she frustrated the heck out of me to start with.
Over the course of a few weeks I realized I had to keep on her back and constantly push her to begin with - reminding her with a nudge every time she slowed down - then she'd pick up a beautiful trot and breeze into a canter on request. But if you lost her cooperation in the first ten minutes, you'd lost her for the hour and would have a fairly exhausting time.

Until I got her measure, my heart would sink on arrival knowing I'd have some hard work ahead of me and my legs would be as stiff as broom handles afterwards!

IME, most horses WILL take the piss if they think they can get away with it! Ours tried all sorts of tactics and usually if you ignored their silliness, remained unfazed and kept pushing them, their wills would lose out to ours.

I miss my riding so much. I was seriously injured last year (spinal compound fracture; not rider error nor a spooked horse, just a pure, split-second, chance accident). I gave it up on a promise to my child, but I sometimes I feel I'd give my right arm for a nice canter around the paddock!

I do agree with you re. the safety - but it is an inherently dangerous pastime, and accidents do happen.

i was nearly killed myself when a riding school steadfast pony took off after seeing a dustbin lorry - right down the middle of a dual carriageway that met with the lane back to the Yard. Only the fact I probably too big for him stopped him I suspect! (I did scream all the way - they told me they could hear me back at the yard. Mind you, I was 12.) I have also known someone be killed out on a sensible when they came off headfirst in a wood (again, from a Riding School). But also, of someone who broke her neck in the Indoor school by hitting the boards (she came off the grumpy mare that I had bonded with).

There will probably come a time when no School sends people out hacking, as they are afraid of what might happen. The combination of less off-road to ride on and dangerous traffic on the roads that it is necessary to cross, or use, might mean that no-one will take the risk - and everyone will be doomed to circles in the school, and the horses may as well BE mechanical ones!

So how come she can canter with Toby if she can't ride?

Hm, hard to know really without seeing you ride.

I use to ride a Frank and I loved him, he was so sweet, would take everything in his stride but he was so slow. At the time it was frustrating but now looking back I can see it was amazing for my seat and aids, making him go forward was such an accomplishment. At the end of riding I could take him out of the yard on my own (no mean feat for a trekking pony)

Next time remember they are probably giving you him to help improve you seat, contact and aids. Focus on that for your next lesson and focus on getting him going as forward as you can. I also agree that your instructor should be showing you the aids, if she can do it, she can show you how to do it. They should also be mixing up the horses you ride so that you get a good amount of experience.

All the best

NB. I've never attempted a personal injury claim nor to report my injury to any official bodies, and would not do so. It would ruin the stable owner and I have no desire whatsoever to do that to her. The horse isn't a tearaway - the place is well managed, and well looked after - and what happened was categorically not her fault.

Haha me too

She may have been cantering on Toby, but that doesn't mean it was safe.

It's very odd to me that if she had such a successful ride on Toby the week before and everyone was happy, that she'd be given Frank this week.

Maybe the riding school are just really crap, but it gives me the impression there must be more to it.

Not really, but unfortunately it's widely accepted in the horse world and even some experienced riders and instructors think that it can be unavoidable.
I train horses and people and nobody riding with me ever kicks. They don't "smack" with a whip either. The most they would do is a light touch on the horse's body or a rattle on their boot.

Same with my dd. I didn’t realise either and the money we wasted over the years there is astronomical. She’s now at a very professional school, where they look after the horses properly. Took dd right back to the beginning to unschool all of those bad habits. She hated it to start off with but now is really progressing.

I have riding lessons and swap between the "Frank" and the "Toby".

Now, Frank is a VERY lazy trotter and it does feel painful, but get him into canter and he's amazing - comfortable, steady, not too bouncy and easy to control. Toby on the other hand is bouncier and faster in trot, but equally very bouncy in canter and not very easy to learn on - even though it's easier to get him going.

I was meant to learn on Frank but he was out injured and I ended up up learning on Toby and it wasn't easy - I even took a tumble over his head. I suspect they have a reason for keeping you on Frank even though it does feel really frustrating at the time.

I can now canter on both but in hindsight I'm really glad I spent more time on Frank.

Indeed!
DS said he was “ Going riding “ today - Mountain biking.

Or as I;ve seen it callled "HorseBack Riding"

Is that to differentiate between ^hanging round your horses neck with the pommel in your stomach" riding ?

@coffeecupsandwaxmelts
Out of interest, how long did it take you to reach that point?

(I might be misremembering my own experience, in the dim mists of time, but OP says she has been going for 6 months, I assume weekly-ish....)

Hard to tell as my lessons were all over the place at first - I'd say it was about a year of lessons but they were only twice a month at first, plus a couple of months off completely as my instructor was on maternity leave

So maybe if they'd been regular, weekly lessons - about six-ish months?

another vote for find another school! frank sounds lovely and like the horse version of a lead rein/second pony for a child - perfect to get them going OR perfect once they’re strong enough to make him go after they know exactly what they’re doing. but he’s no use to someone in the middle, which is where you sound like you’re at @TigeToo . if they’re not interested in you progressing, stop giving them your money. horse riding is expensive and only worth it if you’re actually progressing. i would say though that what a lot of riding schools (and therefore novice riders) think of as progress is going walk, then trot, then canter, then jump, when in fact there’s so much worth in working on a range of things at lower speeds (eg polework in trot, sitting trot without stirrups, working on a lunge in trot with no reins etc) before moving up a gait. but that doesn’t sound like something you will get from where you’re currently at. feel free to PM me your location and i might be able to offer some advice on where you should look 🦄