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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Unexpected downside of wfh

36 replies

Dishwashersaurous · 16/02/2023 15:26

So I hybrid work which means majority of the time I'm working from home. This works brilliantly in terms of being able to do school drop off and back to.start work at 9.

Then can leave work at 5.55 and collect from.afterschool club at 6.

However, I'm off for half term.and desperate to not be in the house because I'm here so much working.

By contrast children are knackered from school and just want to hang around at home chilling out.

I'm ready to climb the walls.

Does anyone recognise this unexpected wfh side effect?

OP posts:
Deliaskis · 16/02/2023 15:33

I don't think that's something that has affected me specifically, although have the usual thing of needing to have clear boundaries about switching off etc.

But on the theme of unexpected downsides of wfh....I would say lunch! I have become thoroughly resentful of feeling like I have sole responsibility for eating whatever is in the fridge/breadbin, in the order in which it needs to be eaten due to freshness etc. I know I could simply not eat what's there, but I sort of feel obliged not to waste it etc. When I was in an office, I would take leftovers maybe 2 days, walk to a local shop to buy soup & baguette 1 day, maybe a lunch out, maybe a shop made sandwich/salad box the other day etc....there was variety and choice. Now it's just...that curry has been there since Tuesday so you have to eat that!

It's a bit of a pathetic moan really, but it is on your theme of unexpected downsides!

TeenLifeMum · 16/02/2023 15:44

Yep, dh is like this since wfh. In holidays he wants to be out all the time. I work in 2 offices across the week with occasional wfh days so I’m holidays I want to chill in my home that I love. We rarely argue but last summer clashed a bit until we realised where we were both coming from and figured out a compromise. It’s weird but does make sense. Dh is an introvert so it works okay for him but he gets a bit bored of seeing the same scenery.

BarrelOfOtters · 16/02/2023 15:50

Yes I get bored of the same scenery and need to get out and see something different, even if it's just lunch out. And I work from the office mostly.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 16/02/2023 15:52

I WFH full time but make sure I go out every evening, just the gym, park, cinema, something like that. I find it helps differentiate work from home so it doesn't feel quite so bad.

Tailstock · 16/02/2023 15:56

Yes I am the same, I have taken a few days leave this week, it's been raining but iv been out doing garden jobs just for a change of scenery

mybunniesandme · 16/02/2023 15:56

Yes I agree - I've never organised so many activities at weekends and holidays as I have since WFH more. I hate Monday mornings knowing I'll be sat in my lounge working all day - then trying to wind down at night then weekends potentially in the same space

Kranke · 16/02/2023 15:57

I miss lunches. I used to work next a big food market and would regularly treat myself to a lovely lunch. My waistline and bank balance aren’t missing it though!

Bumblesaurus · 16/02/2023 15:58

Hahaha yes, I was looking at how much leave I have left to take yesterday, but I couldn't get excited about it because I didn't see the point in taking time off to sit around the house.

Saschka · 16/02/2023 15:59

Yep, we have this argument at home all the time -DH seems to think that me going to work is “me time” because I’m leaving the house, and that he is entitled to a similar amount of time out of the house… at the cinema, or going to the gym, at the weekend. Leaving me with all of the childcare and housework.

I do sympathise with cabin fever, but he could take DS out with him.

Newusername21 · 16/02/2023 16:00

Yeah - I've worked from home for over a decade and the same four walls can get to seem like a prison. I totally know what you're saying!
Like pp has said its a good idea to force yourself out of the house evenings/weekends.
For the holidays with kids you have to compromise and let them chill at home for part of the time and just arrange a few out of the house activities'/trips - but not every day.

TallulahBetty · 16/02/2023 16:06

I hear you. I'm hybrid working as next week I'm 'farming' DD out to her GPs (I wasn't able to book any time off). I feel bad, but after a day of being being glued to work, DD will have run out of ideas to entertain herself - she would much rather have proper company.

Rainallnight · 16/02/2023 16:18

Saschka · 16/02/2023 15:59

Yep, we have this argument at home all the time -DH seems to think that me going to work is “me time” because I’m leaving the house, and that he is entitled to a similar amount of time out of the house… at the cinema, or going to the gym, at the weekend. Leaving me with all of the childcare and housework.

I do sympathise with cabin fever, but he could take DS out with him.

Whaaaaaat?

Seasonofthewitch83 · 16/02/2023 16:24

I would approach half term the same way I would term time - they need to be in suitable childcare arrangements and if not, then I would be packing my laptop and working out of the house for the week!

KickHimInTheCrotch · 16/02/2023 16:31

I work hybrid so the 2 days I WFH are still enough of a novelty that I'm not climbing the walls at the weekend. However my friends who WFH full time are always nagging me to meet up with them and saying how bored they are of the 4 walls. I also spend a LOT of time client facing when I'm not WFH so don't miss human contact like some of my friends do. It's hard to maintain friendships when I'm completely spent and want to lie on my sofa on Friday night!

Dreamstate · 16/02/2023 16:32

As a person who live alone this is why I am now back in the office as much as possible. I only wfh is I need to get an appointment or have a delivery coming.

I love coming back home its my relaxation space so even though I can shut one bedroom off its not the same.

Plus being in central London means I meet my friends more often as we can do a random lets get drinks after work.

I also think being at home did make me less tolerant to noise, being back in the office for first few times, I would be thinking why are people so loud. They weren't being loud its just not being used to that type of background noise.

And especially during the cold weeks I loved how much money I saved not heating the house during the day nor being those who just sucked it up and felt cold.

anotheragain · 16/02/2023 16:36

Yes. I get less of the stuff done I need to it the house too as I just want to be out of the house. I have one day a week off but I just want to get out of the house, whereas I used to spend it getting stuff done in the house. So WFH has actually made me less efficient.

And yes, I have real go's at the kids about how I need to get out the house and so they need to come with me.

I really don't like homeworking at all. I am at home nearly all the time, don't really like where I live or my house, and my job rarely involves speaking to anyone, so it is especially bad for me.

AlwaysaLittleBitTired · 16/02/2023 16:36

Yes, full time wfh here too. I have recently decided to give myself a longer lunch once every month or so to meet DH or friend outside the house for lunch. I have also decided to have my haircuts midweek (yes, I know that's scraping the barrel for company but I get on well with my hairdresser).

DNBU · 16/02/2023 16:45

100%
sick of making my own lunch too.

ChilliBandit · 16/02/2023 16:48

I am the opposite with lunches, I really enjoy being able to make fresh breakfasts/lunches now I WFH, rather than spend money or eat a limp salad/soggy sandwich. I had dippy egg and soldiers for lunch today, was lovely.

paintingwithcampbells · 16/02/2023 16:51

I have a spare room in the attic so can walk away at the end of the day. And I love eating leftovers! Much nicer than sandwiches.

I find I just don't exercise on wfh days. I could go for a walk at lunch, and often tell myself I will, but don't. I'll just slob about watching netflix while eating, and the hour slips away. I cycle into the office on other days which is much better for me.

Ffsmakeitstop · 16/02/2023 17:20

My DH is retired and I work in a shop full time. Every weekend he wants to be off out but never knows where so not only do I have to take him out, he can't drive atm due to ill health, I also have to think about where to go.
I work early morning until lunch time and people assume I only work mornings so don't get tired. They don't realise I've done 3 hours before they surface. Sorry it's not quite the same but still rankles.

Ponderingwindow · 16/02/2023 17:22

Not a problem I share. I quite love being at home.

SnowAndFrostOutside · 16/02/2023 17:43

I love being at home. I assume your kids are old and won't and haven't got childcare? DH and I still take turn with leave to have the kids so they aren't stuck at home and bored. That also means we are quite busy in the term breaks going to various activities.

You don't need full day leave either. I find half day very useful. For example, I can work the morning, and then take the kids to wall climbing or a trampoline park after lunch.

mycatsanutter · 16/02/2023 19:53

How old are the kids ? Surely they aren't going to be tired all week and unable to do anything ?

soboredtonight · 16/02/2023 20:09

Yep I get a walk in with the dogs every day just for a bit of time out the house. I have audio books and I listen to them only when walking the dogs.