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Original poster

'Nicola Bulley's reputation 'destroyed' by police'

922 replies

MyrtIe · 16/02/2023 10:37

Article here

The points made about victim blaming and the police disclosing this information to cover themselves are spot on imo.

The usual gutter press are having a field day with this today.

What exactly was the point of it? What's it achieved, apart from compounding the heartache of her loved ones?

YABU - the police were right to divulge this sensitive information as it was relevant to the investigation

YANBU - there was absolutely no need to do so

OP posts:
JackiePlace · 20/02/2023 23:54

This reply has been deleted

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TooBigForMyBoots · 21/02/2023 00:05

It bullshit speculation @JackiePlace. The Bulley family have asked for an end to bullshit speculation.

JackiePlace · 21/02/2023 00:15

@TooBigForMyBoots Thank you for that information but I doubt any of her family are reading the MN forum.
In any case, I don't see where "speculation" is against the forum rules.

TooBigForMyBoots · 21/02/2023 00:26

Sick, disrespectful, ghoulish behaviour. A bereaved family have made a reasonable request that fuckwits stop speculating on SM about their loved one's death.

It's a disgrace that they had to make such a request, but it seems some people were dragged up with no manners or sense of decency.

PurpleButterflyWings · 21/02/2023 00:27

100% agree @TooBigForMyBoots

@JackiePlace PLEASE STOP. Sad

JackiePlace · 21/02/2023 00:33

TooBigForMyBoots · 21/02/2023 00:26

Sick, disrespectful, ghoulish behaviour. A bereaved family have made a reasonable request that fuckwits stop speculating on SM about their loved one's death.

It's a disgrace that they had to make such a request, but it seems some people were dragged up with no manners or sense of decency.

I disagree with what you say, but I would defend your right to say it.

JackiePlace · 21/02/2023 00:34

JackiePlace · 21/02/2023 00:33

I disagree with what you say, but I would defend your right to say it.

Show quote history

p.s. what about non-fuckwits? Are they still allowed to speculate?

TooBigForMyBoots · 21/02/2023 00:45

All those still speculating on SM and adding to the grief of a family are sick fuckwits.

Northernsouloldies · 21/02/2023 02:17

Mumsnet perhaps it's time to delete this thread just like the one about sending cards to the family. Absolutely nothing more to be said about Nicola and her family that hasn't been said already. Leave them in peace.

biscuiteer · 21/02/2023 03:14

Please delete the thread. Please can people just stop now.

itsgettingweird · 21/02/2023 04:17

TooBigForMyBoots · 21/02/2023 00:45

All those still speculating on SM and adding to the grief of a family are sick fuckwits.

Agree.

MarigoldFeatherstone · 21/02/2023 05:10

It was relevant to the investigation, Because it showed that she was only a little affected by both menopause and alcohol. In spite of some opinions locally.
The police did not consider the family to be at risk after the earlier visit in December.
Neighbours and 'friends' were preparing to sell 'their story' to the tabloids. In spite of not having all the information. In my opinion therefore, it was better that the police put out a statement with minimum factual information with no conjecture in an attempt to stop that happening or at least reduce it's effect.

mids2019 · 21/02/2023 05:34

This reply has been deleted

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15feb · 21/02/2023 06:59

MarigoldFeatherstone · 21/02/2023 05:10

It was relevant to the investigation, Because it showed that she was only a little affected by both menopause and alcohol. In spite of some opinions locally.
The police did not consider the family to be at risk after the earlier visit in December.
Neighbours and 'friends' were preparing to sell 'their story' to the tabloids. In spite of not having all the information. In my opinion therefore, it was better that the police put out a statement with minimum factual information with no conjecture in an attempt to stop that happening or at least reduce it's effect.

None of us can say how affected she was by this factor or that factor. Only the police and her family will know. The police did not say they did not consider her to be at risk. Also, the fact that she wasn't sectioned doesn't mean anything – earlier posters pointed out the practical difficulties (legal difficulty/impossibility, strained NHS facilities, etc) of doing so.

I appreciate you might be wanting to "rescue" her reputation, but I think this has the opposite effect of making any issues (if any) she potentially did suffer from look shameful, when really they shouldn't be... As a poster said above, I think the family need some non-judgmental privacy to reconcile all that's happened, whatever that may be.

daisychain01 · 21/02/2023 07:06

there have been millions of posts created by people who have never met this woman, or her family, don't live in the area or the county or even the country, have never been involved in search and rescue, and yet those people including on here have suddenly become experts about someone's life and circumstances they have zero knowledge about.

This is what social media and 24/7 news on loop has done to our society.

Don't people have their own lives?

Nellodee · 21/02/2023 07:38

On radio 4 yesterday morning, there was someone from some body that helped victims of crime(sorry can’t remember which one). They said that the family had got in touch with the police saying someone they knew was going to sell an expose about her alcohol use and mental health issues. Apparently, the family asked the police to release the information first to kill the story. This, to me, puts their revelations in a totally different light. They took the blame for releasing the information to make the family’s lives a little easier.

Port1aCastis · 21/02/2023 08:18

The ghouls and vultures should let the poor woman rest in peace now and as her family have asked to be left alone just let it be.

Bippetyboppityboob · 21/02/2023 09:07

Nellodee · 21/02/2023 07:38

On radio 4 yesterday morning, there was someone from some body that helped victims of crime(sorry can’t remember which one). They said that the family had got in touch with the police saying someone they knew was going to sell an expose about her alcohol use and mental health issues. Apparently, the family asked the police to release the information first to kill the story. This, to me, puts their revelations in a totally different light. They took the blame for releasing the information to make the family’s lives a little easier.

This was alluded to in the family's statement a few days back. Again it swirls back to the media being disgusting vultures- they very well would pay someone £££s and print the story when if they had an ounce of integrity and respect they wouldn't entertain it. Of course people could still post on social media, but more people believe what they read in the papers than on social media so it would be different imo.

The police have taken a lot of flack when realistically their initial thoughts, following their expertise, experience and whatever else was sadly correct. There was an article yesterday where the police were criticised for their social media person responding to a tweet saying we will pass your kind words on to the SIO- what's wrong with that ffs? And then of course the medias intrusion, theories, giving 'experts' a platform. Its disgusting.

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 21/02/2023 11:21

Again it swirls back to the media being disgusting vultures- they very well would pay someone £££s and print the story when if they had an ounce of integrity and respect they wouldn't entertain it

I wouldn’t be surprised if that was behind the media’s constant hounding of the police.

if they had a sniff of something being kept from then and just picked until someone was actually prepared to put their name to it and sell.

dawngreen · 21/02/2023 11:34

I heard that it was a local new YouTube person that actually went, and filmed the body being removed from the river. I thought that was really sick. And people reported her too.

Pirateships · 21/02/2023 11:43

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 21/02/2023 11:21

Again it swirls back to the media being disgusting vultures- they very well would pay someone £££s and print the story when if they had an ounce of integrity and respect they wouldn't entertain it

I wouldn’t be surprised if that was behind the media’s constant hounding of the police.

if they had a sniff of something being kept from then and just picked until someone was actually prepared to put their name to it and sell.

Yep, pretty much! There are absolutely many issues within the police and I'm in no way claiming that they're perfect, but out of everything the way to media approaches and handles cases like this should absolutely be addressed. I mean they criticised the police for releasing the personal info but they all printed it when they didn't have to.

TrinnySmith · 21/02/2023 11:47

There is lots of wailing and gnashing of teeth and ‘the police should do more’ comments. But the media are a law unto themselves and there’s nothing we can do about it (unless thousands came off TikTok in protest but it’s too important in people’s lives for that to happen).

Hawkins003 · 21/02/2023 12:47

daisychain01 · 21/02/2023 07:06

there have been millions of posts created by people who have never met this woman, or her family, don't live in the area or the county or even the country, have never been involved in search and rescue, and yet those people including on here have suddenly become experts about someone's life and circumstances they have zero knowledge about.

This is what social media and 24/7 news on loop has done to our society.

Don't people have their own lives?

It's the same as the past but with the internet, it's global

Pirateships · 21/02/2023 12:56

TrinnySmith · 21/02/2023 11:47

There is lots of wailing and gnashing of teeth and ‘the police should do more’ comments. But the media are a law unto themselves and there’s nothing we can do about it (unless thousands came off TikTok in protest but it’s too important in people’s lives for that to happen).

Eurgh wailing and gnashing of teeth is a hideous phrase.

But the media shouldn't be a law unto themselves is the point, its not the polices place to sort it out but IPSO should seen as though the outlets won't take responsibility themselves. Social media is out of control and too hard to actually moderate in any meaningful way really, but these people wouldn't have as much ammo if it wasn't broadcast and inflamed by the media.

Newnamenewme23 · 21/02/2023 13:07

There was an article yesterday where the police were criticised for their social media person responding to a tweet saying we will pass your kind words on to the SIO- what's wrong with that ffs? And then of course the medias intrusion, theories, giving 'experts' a platform. Its disgusting

I thought the hounding of the SIO over her appearance was disgusting too.

she’s a detective. Detectives don’t wear uniform. She wore an appropriate M&s suit dress and just happens to have a fit and toned body. Yes she’s clearly made an effort for the cameras but who wouldn’t. Especially a middle aged woman- she was probably anticipating being torn apart over her appearance anyway, but not because she looked “too good”. No make up and casual dress and she’d have been a sour faced old boot with no empathy.

I’m not surprised she’s let the SLT make the statements from then on.

there’s someone on Facebook keeps posting Police Officer recruitment ads on all the “police did a crap job” threads which I want to applaud.

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