To think this is a very privileged view on life

[HermioneWeasley]

Saw this shared on social media today and my immediate thought was “aye, tell that to the women being raped to death by the Iranian national guard.”

am I a miserable cow, or does this represent an incredibly privileged and narrow experience of life? Is it unbearably trite?

its a bit naff but if it makes someone feel better who is having a shit time then I don't see any harm in it.

Have a read of "the Choice" by Edith Eger. Or "The Gift" but I would always say read The Choice first.

She was a Jewish teenager during.ww2. she writes powerfully about how she used this mind over matter thinking to cope, during her time imprisoned and the aftermath

Yes, as a Facebook meme type thing is a bit trite, but actually we all have a choice how we deal with the challenges life throws at us (am not an Iranian prisoner admittedly, but I do have a condition that means I am often bedbound, so finding the "positive" is key to keeping going)

I find them twee and I eye roll when I see them but if one of them resonates with someone and makes a difference to their day, then it's a good thing surely?
You give an extreme example (and if anyone sent these to those poor women then that would be highly insensitive).
But where do you stop? Supermarkets not advertising or even offering dine in for 2 deals including wine because they cost some people's whole week food budget? No one posting holiday photos because it's not fair on those that can't afford them? (Both of which i have seen complained about on social media, and I am sure there are other examples).
Having compassion for people in difficult circumstances is to be applauded, and I do think we need to be mindful about what we post and where. But life would be exhausting and almost impossible if we had to consider every single person that we might offend by something as innocuous as those memes.

It's not a competition, OP. There's no prize for being the person with the worst possible life ever. And, it's entirely possible to feel terrible even if on paper you have a privileged life. Your attitude makes people who are suffering from mental ill health (with on-paper-privileged-lives) feel like they have no "right" to seek help. Or even be ill in the first place.

FWIW I find it twee but regardless those are the things I teach my kids, to help build resilience - and, in fact, when my son was diagnosed with two life-changing, incurable autoimmune diseases, sentiment like that was in fact helpful.

So yeah, you are being a bit of a misery.

I’m going something pretty horrendous at the moment health wise.

This is after a life time of really, really shit things happening to me. If I listed them all, I’d get called a troll. Even my husband said the other night that this is all almost unbelievable to happen to one person.

The amount of times I’ve been told stuff like that

It makes me want to fucking scream.

No amount of positive thinking or people telling me that better days are coming would ever help me.

Better days aren’t coming. The latest is that I’ve been told I am going blind at 43. My youngest is just a toddler. And that’s along with all the other shit that makes up my life.

A miracle won’t happen. It is hopeless - there is no treatment for the condition I have. There is nothing I, or any doctor in the world can do. And what is the bright side or the new beginning from knowing that one day, I won’t be able to see my children?

Shit like that is deeply patronising to people who are going though serious things.

It’s a bit twee but quite frankly I’d say we are all in privileged positions over the women you describe , so I am not sure what your point is. In the scenario you present we are all privileged.

its just an odd thought process over something so twee.

No I find it twee crap!! Another one I hate is 'you've got this' got what ??!

Agreed. It works for some people I guess.

Chlamydia?

I agree with the endings/beginnings bit but the rest is a crock of shit.
I hate the silly font and pastel colours too.

I do think some people respond well to this sort of thing and just need to be gee'd up to crack on with things, but I'm not one of them. Life is shit and silly pictures like this won't improve my lot.

Agree with PP that it's patronising.

Not everything is aimed at everyone. It's not for you, so what?

^this

Some people have the very worst luck while others sail through life merrily. No amount of twee positive messages will make it alright.

I would say it's better than being told you, in the general sense, are not suffering enough to complain there are being having it worse

It depends on what is going on in your life. I can remember (and scoffing at) nonsense like this when my mum was terminally ill.

Do you think those being raped’s position will be improved if they believe their situation is hopeless, that they are unequipped to handle their misery and that there is no chance that their situation will end?

While a positive mindset won’t improve their immediate circumstances, it might give them the resolve and fight to keep going (there are a lot of references to this in Holocaust survivors) rather than curl up and die and fall into deep(er) depression.

It is a bit twee, it’s not practically hugely helpful, but keeping a hopeful and positive outlook is a survival strategy that might help even in the most dire circumstances.

We can’t always accommodate those in the worst circumstances, people from all walks of life have issues that are important to them even if they are trivial in the context of the wider world. No one ever felt better by knowing they weren’t the WORST done by. Should those being raped be grateful they aren’t being murdered?

Also this is an instagram post, I don’t think the target audience is those being raped in Iranian prisons as I doubt they are given much opportunity to scroll through life coaching social media pages…

Another one I hate is 'you've got this' got what ??!
Actually, although I wouldn't use this phrase with my friends I do find it useful with some of the teenage girls I work with. It works well as a bit of a pep talk after they have had a falling out with friends or a boyfriend has dumped them. It seems to work for them.

Not everyone's problems are huge to outsiders but to some young people some of their issues can seem significant. Little reminders of how wonderful they are, how far they have come with other issues they have dealt with and a reminder that they can get through 'this', whatever 'this' is can be a useful tool.

No need for others to diss it if it doesn't apply or useful to you.

'It's not intended to lift people up from rare trauma. It's intended to keep us on an even keel in daily life. Surely that's obvious?'

This ^ It is obviously aimed at day to say first world problems, and not major trauma. Op why can't you see that? It is like when people complain, there is always somebody worse off but it doesn't mean that people cannot feel upset.

Well, you’re right but I don’t think you should consider a career in motivational speaking.

I don't think it's meant for people who are dead or even those who have suffered trauma.

I'm pretty sure it's aimed at people who overthink things that are in reality trivial (such as memes).

People love trite shit written on things. A walk through the next home department confirms this. If you dont like it dont read them.

Surely not! ...

It’s nice to be hopeful and glass half full but agree with you that this is not always possible and it is the privilege at times of those who have lesser worries.

I just looked up the Instagram profile. My eyes are burning from all the beige and twee fonts.
Its still inoffensive though

Sorry you have been having a crap time op. I think it’s called toxic positivity.

Don’t wish to sound patronising as obviously there are some young people who have gone through a lot, but quite a lot of this sort of content is put on Instagram or Tik Tok by young people who by definition are healthier than most, they are optimistic about the life ahead of them, and many haven’t yet encountered loss or serious illness, thankfully for them! It’s best just to ignore and move on.

Having said that, it may be twee, but I think some bits of the message have validity. I’m sure it’s different when faced with an endless onslaught of crap, but there are instances where enduring and overcoming shitty times makes us stronger.

It’s trite bollocks but it isn’t aimed at people with severe MH issues or in dire circumstances. Same as the ‘have a lovely warm bubble bath’ or ‘go for a walk‘ memes you see. They are lightweight advice for averagely happy people having a down day, nothing more, nothing less.