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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think the UK is more tolerant of dogs than children

201 replies

playgroundwarrior · 14/02/2023 13:55

This morning an entitled dog owner shouted at me for pointing out that she wasn't allowed her (offlead) dog in our local playground. The dog was nosing around in our pushchair and hurtling around. The owner said she had seen the notices to say 'no dogs allowed except assistance dogs' but that hers was a puppy and that I needed to get a life! She genuinely thought her dog was as important as our children (she didn't have her own child and was with a friend)

This made me think about all the threads I've seen here about noisy toddlers in cafes and small children blocking the stairs. Last night I read someone moaning about the sounds of Peppa Pig on the bus.

I appreciate that the above examples of toddler behaviour are objectively annoying (mine frequently annoys me) but I'm beginning to think there's greater tolerance of dogs in this country than toddlers.

I've seen so many toddlers knocked over by offlead dogs and our 3 year old neighbour was pinned down by one last year, which was sort of just accepted as something that happens.

Since the pandemic, everyone seems to have a dog and the culture feels much more dog orientated than child oriented. I'd love a nice cafe or pub with a sign welcoming kids and a nice play area for them but have never seen one in my area, yet there are many signs welcoming dogs with treats and bowls.

Fully appreciate there are inconsiderate parents of toddlers and great dog owners who have perfect recall etc! I quite like most dogs but am
starting to feel the UK has its priorities very muddled.

AIBU?

OP posts:
LexMitior · 14/02/2023 15:34

This dog, is a tiny dog. So tiny you can barely see it. Your sign is for a regular dog.... so it's fine.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=GYAoB115O2Q

gogohmm · 14/02/2023 15:53

Entitled pet parents and human parents are as bad as each other! The reality is that other people aren't interested in accommodating either your children or pets so make sure you aren't putting others out. There's spaces set aside for children (play parks) and dogs should not be there, in other spaces they are shared so dog owners should keep their animals under control (not necessarily on a lead if well trained) and human child owners should ensure there little darlings don't pester dogs happily playing with their tennis ball by chasing after them (ok that's a personal one Grin)

I'm restaurants, if your baby (human or fur) starts making a lot of noise and can't be settled, take them out promptly. And if it's not really a good environment for your little ones, leave them at home (obviously the children need a sitter) if I'm paying £150 for dinner I really don't want to be disturbed by humans or animals.

GrinGrin

squashyhat · 14/02/2023 15:58

Off-lead dogs and noisy children occupy the same space in my world.

HufflepuffRavenclaw · 14/02/2023 15:58

Choconut · 14/02/2023 13:59

Yes it's all about the entitlement.

Yup.

Some people love their dogs. We get it. You are free to love your dogs as much as you want, in your own houses/garden. But it is also sheer fucking common sense to realise that lots of us DON'T love your dogs. That we're either indifferent to your "fur baby" or actively dislike it. So any decent owner keeps their dogs to themselves. On leads. Out of areas where dogs are not allowed.

I got a mouthful of abuse from one of those dog-obsessed people when I asked her to remove her dog from the charity shop where I was volunteering. She said it was "just a puppy" and when that didn't work, said it was an "assistance dog". Like hell it was. So entitled, and there are about 4500% more of them than 5 year ago.

fitzwilliamdarcy · 14/02/2023 16:21

I think entitled parents and entitled dog owners are both dreadful, but I find that there are way, way, way more entitled parents than dog owners (and often the entitled own both!). I literally can't find a cafe that isn't like a bloody zoo these days, and it's not the dogs. Ditto restaurants, buses, trains, the theatre, supermarkets...

I also think that dog owners are mildly less annoying because they don't smugly insist that them having a dog is for my and society's benefit because it's going to look after me in my old age. At least dog owners know they got a dog because they wanted one and nothing more.

vivainsomnia · 14/02/2023 16:23

I'd love a nice cafe or pub with a sign welcoming kids and a nice play area for them but have never seen one in my area, yet there are many signs welcoming dogs with treats and bowls
Come on OP, that's not evidence that dogs are more appreciated than kids, if anything, it's the opposite as it should be. No need to me tion kids because it's obvious they are welcome and a sign isn't required to state so.

vivainsomnia · 14/02/2023 16:25

Haha, love that video!

ohyouknowwhatshername · 14/02/2023 16:26

I remember reading that the NSPCA existed 50 years before the NSPCC. Says it all really.

vivainsomnia · 14/02/2023 16:28

I got a mouthful of abuse from one of those dog-obsessed people when I asked her to remove her dog from the charity shop where I was volunteering
Many charity shops accept dogs. Maybe the issue was how you spoke to her. I can think of better ways to ask someone to not bring their dog in than asking them to remove them!

Hazelnup · 14/02/2023 16:35

YANBU. My child got bitten by an off-lead puppy last week. In a kids playground. Owner “He’s just a puppy.”

Yes I know he’s a puppy, I have no problem with the puppy but wtf is the owner doing taking it for an offlead walk at 4pm on a school day in a kid’s playground opposite a primary school? In an area surrounded by woods, where they could easily walk instead?

My child is now terrified of dogs and screams if he sees one. People act like my child is the problem but it seems a rational response to me 🤷‍♀️

Catapultaway · 14/02/2023 16:35

Depends on perspective I suppose. To her, her dog probably is more important than your child.
My kids are more important than my dogs (working dogs, that work), but my dogs are more important to me than your kids are to me.
Doesn't excuse her poor behavior of course, all dogs should be trained properly.

Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 16:53

This reply has been deleted

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Why does someone owe you a seat because you're pregnant?

You're not ill or a martyr - you chose to have a baby. You're not more important than a woman on her own.

LexMitior · 14/02/2023 16:56

Dogs don't need seats. That women was a fool.

HufflepuffRavenclaw · 14/02/2023 16:56

Why does someone owe you a seat because you're pregnant?

FFS. A pregnant woman, who is struggling to manhandle a pram too, is "owed" a seat more than a sodding animal.

Original poster
playgroundwarrior · 14/02/2023 16:59

So sorry to hear that @Hazelnup. That's horrendous.

'This dog is a tiny dog' video is hilarious! I want to find my dog baby park lady and show it to her!

OP posts:
Headabovetheparakeet · 14/02/2023 17:02

I think this is more the case of the dog owners thinking their wants and needs are more important than yours or your child's rather than a thing about dogs specifically.

I agree with you though, my son was knocked over a few times by untrained, off lead puppies during lockdown and the owners were all useless.

LexMitior · 14/02/2023 17:03

Tiny dog is a whole series which gets funnier and more ridiculous each time.

Say it! "this dog, is a tiny dog..."

www.tiktok.com/@alexiadox/video/7113996796237499690?lang=en

winterpastasalad · 14/02/2023 17:08

We were having a BBQ once on a beach that was dogs on leads only. A drooling boxer bounded over, jumped up and started licking the meat. DH tried to shoo the dog away and a very irrate owner marched over and started screaming that his dog had as much right to enjoy itself as our dc did Hmm I tried to point out that our dc were sitting quietly and if they tried to lick anyone else's food they'd be in trouble. The man just couldn't see why we were annoyed that his precious dog child was slobbering over our food.

WehIstMir · 14/02/2023 17:16

HufflepuffRavenclaw · 14/02/2023 16:56

Why does someone owe you a seat because you're pregnant?

FFS. A pregnant woman, who is struggling to manhandle a pram too, is "owed" a seat more than a sodding animal.

Really? Wherever I have lived in the world with decent public transport, passengers are asked to vacate priority seats for pregnant women. Does a pregnant woman on a site called 'Mumsnet' really need to explain why she would need a seat, not to mention being with a pram and a child?

LlynTegid · 14/02/2023 17:25

I think OP there is a greater acceptance of dogs. Not that bad dog ownership should ever be excused.

beAsensible1 · 14/02/2023 17:26

playgroundwarrior · 14/02/2023 13:55

This morning an entitled dog owner shouted at me for pointing out that she wasn't allowed her (offlead) dog in our local playground. The dog was nosing around in our pushchair and hurtling around. The owner said she had seen the notices to say 'no dogs allowed except assistance dogs' but that hers was a puppy and that I needed to get a life! She genuinely thought her dog was as important as our children (she didn't have her own child and was with a friend)

This made me think about all the threads I've seen here about noisy toddlers in cafes and small children blocking the stairs. Last night I read someone moaning about the sounds of Peppa Pig on the bus.

I appreciate that the above examples of toddler behaviour are objectively annoying (mine frequently annoys me) but I'm beginning to think there's greater tolerance of dogs in this country than toddlers.

I've seen so many toddlers knocked over by offlead dogs and our 3 year old neighbour was pinned down by one last year, which was sort of just accepted as something that happens.

Since the pandemic, everyone seems to have a dog and the culture feels much more dog orientated than child oriented. I'd love a nice cafe or pub with a sign welcoming kids and a nice play area for them but have never seen one in my area, yet there are many signs welcoming dogs with treats and bowls.

Fully appreciate there are inconsiderate parents of toddlers and great dog owners who have perfect recall etc! I quite like most dogs but am
starting to feel the UK has its priorities very muddled.

AIBU?

recently saw a cafe in leafy part of town that said prams/small kids not welcome between 12-2 !

Original poster
playgroundwarrior · 14/02/2023 17:33

It's such an odd attitude @winterpastasalad And revealing that they likened their dogs to your human children! Clue: they're in no way comparable!

To the people telling me that their dog was more important to them than my kid (I received that messsge loud and clear from doggy mama at the park!) I'd say that's irrelevant.

I love my annoying toddler more than I love someone else's granny, but if any granny needed a seat on the bus, I'd make the kid move! Because we live in community and there are certain social codes we adhere to as part of a civilised society! As for the person not standing up for a pregnant lady, well that's just bizarre.

OP posts:
Comedycook · 14/02/2023 17:35

Yes!

A few years ago I took my two primary aged children to our local pub at lunchtime. It advertises itself as being open to children and dogs. My two children were sat at the table, well behaved, not running round, talking at a normal volume. One woman kept giving them the most horrible dirty looks. Meanwhile my friend goes there with her huge dog and gets endless endless positive attention from people.

Forever42 · 14/02/2023 17:35

squashyhat · 14/02/2023 15:58

Off-lead dogs and noisy children occupy the same space in my world.

I think this is part of the problem.Dogs and children should not be equated. Dogs are inferior to children because they are not human and shouldn't be considered in the same way. Children should be allowed more freedoms than dogs.

Twentywisteria · 14/02/2023 17:38

Only people with children think their children are much more important than animals.

I much prefer animals to children. There is nothing at all special about your child to me.

It isn't everyone else's problem that you had a baby and your hormones tricked you into thinking it was perfect rather than just another animal on the earth.