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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Taking wings off dead fly = psychopath?

101 replies

gezelligheid · 11/02/2023 20:05

I sprayed a housefly with spray and left it to die. Later I've come back and it has no wings. Although he denies it, I know DS11 removed the wings. When I asked about it he got nervous and started laughing and denied it.

Should I be worried that he is pulling the wings off a dead fly? Is it psychopath behaviour?

YABU - not psychopath behaviour
YANBU - psychopath behaviour

OP posts:
Youdoyoubabe · 11/02/2023 20:06

Fairly normal childhood behavour. Junior science!

You are the one that killed it......

pussycatinfluffyslippers · 11/02/2023 20:07

not as bad as taking them off before the fly spray had fully worked😉

BrutusMcDogface · 11/02/2023 20:07

Oh my god! 😂

yes, you killed it. You’re the psychopath 😉

Hellodarknessmyoldpal · 11/02/2023 20:07

You're the one who killed it though. He didn't catch and torture it. Sounds like he was just a bit curious.

Brendabigbaps · 11/02/2023 20:08

You sprayed a fly and then left it to die. Psychopath?

if I kill a fly, I make sure it dies as quickly as possible by picking up in a tissue and squashing etc etc.

alwoajsp · 11/02/2023 20:09

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

XenoBitch · 11/02/2023 20:10

If pulling the wings off of a dead fly makes someone a psychopath, then I surely need to be permanently incarcerated, based on what I did to bugs as a child.

alwoajsp · 11/02/2023 20:10

Whoops that was meant to go the MNHQ 😂

SomeCommonThing · 11/02/2023 20:11

....it's dead.

The lads I went to school with used to pull the legs off of live crane flies and spiders, one of them ate live ants. I don't think you need to be too worried.

DaveyJonesLocker · 11/02/2023 20:13

Fly spray is vile stuff, can't believe people still use it. Just open a window and let it out.

I'd be concerned if DS was pulling the wings off living flies, but I'd also not be teaching him to kill flies.

gezelligheid · 11/02/2023 20:14

Thank you for the reassurance guys. I know I'm the one that killed it etc etc which probably makes me worse! But when I saw he'd taken the wings off all I could think was all those things we are told about how kids who do that go on to be psychopaths and I wanted some opinions from other people instead.

Once something is in my head I tend to fret about it so you've really helped.

He's a lovely kid, really passionate about football and music, is a lovely brother to his baby brother and he still loves a cuddle with mum so it's not like there are any other reasons for me to be worried. So that's probably why it threw me for six!

But I appreciate your responses. Thanks xxx

OP posts:
WhiteArsenic · 11/02/2023 20:14

I used to cut open my pet hamsters after they’d died to see what they looked like inside. I became a vet, rather than a psychopath. There’s a big difference between gruesome curiosity and cruelty. If it’s already dead, there’s no cruelty. If it’s still alive … that’s different.

gezelligheid · 11/02/2023 20:15

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

How is it a troll post? I don't understand? It was a genuine question.

OP posts:
BlüeöysterCunt · 11/02/2023 20:16

XenoBitch · 11/02/2023 20:10

If pulling the wings off of a dead fly makes someone a psychopath, then I surely need to be permanently incarcerated, based on what I did to bugs as a child.

Same 😭

RoseslnTheHospital · 11/02/2023 20:17

Psychopaths are (stereotypically) supposed to take the wings off when the fly is alive. Because they have no empathy for the fly's suffering and are either just interested in it's reactions or worse are actively enjoying seeing it suffer.

Taking the wings off an already dead fly is just curiosity.

QueenCamilla · 11/02/2023 20:19

I used to throw earth-worms to ants and watch the nature take it's toll (worms being sucked out until they shrivel).
I'm much less fond of that idea these days... 😁

Luredbyapomegranate · 11/02/2023 20:20

I can’t work out if that would be a good thing in your eyes or not Fly Killer lady?

Teach him how to give bugs a quick death, spray and SWAT OP, spray and SWAT.

MammaTill2Pojkar · 11/02/2023 20:20

My son got stung by a bumblebee, turned out he was trying to pull it's legs off so it could only fly, he was only 5 though so the thought of him being a future psychopath didn't even cross my mind. I'm hoping he learnt his lesson as the karma was very quick to sting him... we've discussed that it's not a nice thing to do as well of course.

Unikeko · 11/02/2023 20:21

You killed it. 🙄

He just exhibited some morbid curiosity.

gezelligheid · 11/02/2023 20:21

QueenCamilla · 11/02/2023 20:19

I used to throw earth-worms to ants and watch the nature take it's toll (worms being sucked out until they shrivel).
I'm much less fond of that idea these days... 😁

Earthworms really creep me out so this description made me feel a bit sick inside! But its actually really interesting because I never would have imagined that would be the outcome or that ants would do things like that!

OP posts:
NeedMoMoney · 11/02/2023 20:21

WhiteArsenic · 11/02/2023 20:14

I used to cut open my pet hamsters after they’d died to see what they looked like inside. I became a vet, rather than a psychopath. There’s a big difference between gruesome curiosity and cruelty. If it’s already dead, there’s no cruelty. If it’s still alive … that’s different.

If you cut one open...why did you have to keep cutting others open! How many hamsters did you have!!!

WhenDovesFly · 11/02/2023 20:22

My mum (now 86) told me as a kid she used to pull the wings off of crane flies, while they were still alive. She's never shown any psychopathic tendencies that I'm aware of.

Airplant · 11/02/2023 20:23

I would suggest you buy him a copy of E O Wilson , letters to a young scientist. one of the great Ecologists of our times, who started out dissecting ants to see how they function and investigated their pheromones as a child.

www.amazon.co.uk/Letters-Young-Scientist-Edward-Wilson/dp/0871403854/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=

Ceilingplaits · 11/02/2023 20:24

Killing the fly in the first place is the more psychopathic behaviour. Your son presumably got it from you!

Spanisheomellletttes · 11/02/2023 20:24

There was a girl in my son's class who not only removed the wings off a fly, she kept it alive - as a pet. That disturbed my kids so much that they never went back. I still wonder how she is turning out. There were some serious problems at her home.