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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Not to trust DS

49 replies

MeghanThyStallion · 08/02/2023 21:55

DS is nearly 13. He was lying in wait for DH to get home, hovering about on the landing instead of brushing his teeth. When DH arrived home, he handed DS a Crunchie bar and DS whooped and scuttled off with it in his oodie pouch. I followed him and made him hand it over so I could put it out of temptation's reach overnight. DS was swearing blind that he only wanted to "admire" it and he wouldn't eat it until your morning. I took it anyway, because he's 12 and I don't want him rotting his teeth. He's displeased.

WIBU?

OP posts:
Thunderpunt · 08/02/2023 22:11

Have you eaten it yet? 😈

NEmama · 08/02/2023 22:14

Bet you enjoyed it with a brew once he was in bed ☺️
I wouldn't trust mine either

CoorieInByTheFire · 08/02/2023 22:16

He’s 13, could he not have eaten it then brushed his teeth again?

TinaYouFatLard · 08/02/2023 22:17

I think you’re a bit of a meanie.

Zola1 · 08/02/2023 22:19

Ahh..I think you were a bit of a fun sponge, he could have eaten the crunchie he was clearly buzzing for and then done his teeth again!

Createausername1970 · 08/02/2023 22:21

I am undecided. I would be wanting to know why DH was giving DS chocolate at bedtime and why was DS seemingly waiting for it? What's going on there?

But the time will come when you will be confiscating far worse than a crunchie, so in overall scheme of things, it's not that bad.

Girlswithgoodbodieslikeboyswithferarris · 08/02/2023 22:24

Nobody is going to have all their teeth fall out because they had a crunchie in the evening once when they were 12. Even if they don’t brush their teeth after.

Are you always this controlling?

Mischance · 08/02/2023 22:27

So .... his Dad brings him a treat and you take it away ..... hmmm

BabyOnBoard90 · 08/02/2023 22:28

Just a standard day to day parenting event.

YANBU for your actions (besides making the thread).

FrenchBoule · 08/02/2023 22:33

YANBU

He can have it tomorrow in the daytime.

As for “D” H he can deal with DS’s toothaches and dentist appointments also incur any costs associated.

My teeth are all patched up due to slack in care and DGM giving sweets before bedtime. I loved it but my teeth were in a sorry state after that.

Chickychoccyegg · 08/02/2023 22:38

What did dh think? If I'd brought home a treat for my dc and my dh confiscated it, I'd have something to say about that. He's nearly 13, I probably wouldn't trust him not to eat it, but I would likely say, if you're eating it now remember to brush your teeth again before going to bed 🙂

WrendaleCountryDogs · 08/02/2023 22:44

One crunchie isn't going to rot his teeth.

Girlswithgoodbodieslikeboyswithferarris · 08/02/2023 22:47

WrendaleCountryDogs · 08/02/2023 22:44

One crunchie isn't going to rot his teeth.

It’s a gateway drug. Before we know it he’ll be on the candy floss and Fanta.

RobertaFirmino · 08/02/2023 22:48

Well done! I hope you'll be having a stern chat with your DH too, you must be ever so cross! Nobody needs chocolate and quite frankly, any sort of food after 6pm is pure PIGGERY. Honestly, it's no wonder children are going off the rails if they are permitted to gorge themselves on sugar. To be honest, I think your DH has been very neglectful, borderline abusive in fact and I'd make it clear that from now on, carrot batons are the only acceptable snack food. Two or three batons should suffice, there's really no need for gluttony.

Chickenly · 08/02/2023 22:49

I’d be thoroughly pissed off if I bought my DS a treat and my DH overruled me and confiscated it. Who made you the big boss? If I were your DH then I’d be asking for a serious conversation about control, respect and his equal right to make parenting decisions.

Girlswithgoodbodieslikeboyswithferarris · 08/02/2023 22:49

RobertaFirmino · 08/02/2023 22:48

Well done! I hope you'll be having a stern chat with your DH too, you must be ever so cross! Nobody needs chocolate and quite frankly, any sort of food after 6pm is pure PIGGERY. Honestly, it's no wonder children are going off the rails if they are permitted to gorge themselves on sugar. To be honest, I think your DH has been very neglectful, borderline abusive in fact and I'd make it clear that from now on, carrot batons are the only acceptable snack food. Two or three batons should suffice, there's really no need for gluttony.

Carrots are full of sugar. Celery is better.

CowSnail · 08/02/2023 22:50

Girlswithgoodbodieslikeboyswithferarris · 08/02/2023 22:49

Carrots are full of sugar. Celery is better.

Show quote history

Celery isn’t entirely calorie free. The kid has a toothbrush, let him just chew on that.

ChocMarshmallows · 08/02/2023 22:50

RobertaFirmino · 08/02/2023 22:48

Well done! I hope you'll be having a stern chat with your DH too, you must be ever so cross! Nobody needs chocolate and quite frankly, any sort of food after 6pm is pure PIGGERY. Honestly, it's no wonder children are going off the rails if they are permitted to gorge themselves on sugar. To be honest, I think your DH has been very neglectful, borderline abusive in fact and I'd make it clear that from now on, carrot batons are the only acceptable snack food. Two or three batons should suffice, there's really no need for gluttony.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

ChocMarshmallows · 08/02/2023 22:51

Made up post? Can't b real surely!? It's a crunchie not crack cocaine!!

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 08/02/2023 22:52

Is this a joke?

Original poster
MeghanThyStallion · 08/02/2023 22:53

I didn't let him eat it and then brush his teeth because it was already past his bedtime. Of it had been half an hour earlier I wouldn't have been bothered.

Yes, I am always this controlling with my 12 year old son. I'm his parent Confused DH is his step dad and hasn't got PR.

No, I haven't eaten it yet Grin I've put it with his phone (also confiscated overnight, meanie that I am) ready for him to undoubtedly eat it for breakfast tomorrow. If it had been a proper chocolate bar, he might not have been so lucky!

Apparently he texted DH to ask for a Crunchie as a reward for reading DD a story and letting her brush his hair when I was ill yesterday. Hence lying in wait!

OP posts:
TheChosenTwo · 08/02/2023 22:54

Does his dad usually bring him a crunchie? He was obviously expecting it as he was waiting about for it.
What time was this? On the surface of it I’d say YABU, it’s one crunchie, a brush of the teeth a little while after eating wouldn’t do much harm although not something I’d want to be happening on a nightly basis.
unless you’re about to say that your ds has diabetes or something!

Girlswithgoodbodieslikeboyswithferarris · 08/02/2023 22:55

CowSnail · 08/02/2023 22:50

Celery isn’t entirely calorie free. The kid has a toothbrush, let him just chew on that.

Show quote history

But toothpaste often has xylitol in it, and we can’t be sure he has rinsed the toothbrush thoroughly. Surely a glass of water is the only acceptable thing to consume?

RobertaFirmino · 08/02/2023 22:56

ChocMarshmallows · 08/02/2023 22:51

Made up post? Can't b real surely!? It's a crunchie not crack cocaine!!

But the SUGAR! Not to mention the CARBS and the ADDITIVES! I can't believe you think it's acceptable to allow our children to BINGE on CHEMICALS!

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 08/02/2023 22:56

I'd have let him eat the crunchie. Especially as it wasn't a normal thing to happen.

The phone is a non comparable situation. No DC should have their phones overnight that young