Not to trust DS

[MeghanThyStallion]

DS is nearly 13. He was lying in wait for DH to get home, hovering about on the landing instead of brushing his teeth. When DH arrived home, he handed DS a Crunchie bar and DS whooped and scuttled off with it in his oodie pouch. I followed him and made him hand it over so I could put it out of temptation's reach overnight. DS was swearing blind that he only wanted to "admire" it and he wouldn't eat it until your morning. I took it anyway, because he's 12 and I don't want him rotting his teeth. He's displeased.

WIBU?

Redic.

He hasn't got diabetes but he's currently eating for England. He's cleared out the fruit bowl, eaten DD's yogurts, had tea, then made himself beans on toast. He's very fit and as skinny as a rake but he was a prem baby and hasn't got a full coating of enamel on all his teeth. I just realised that's a big drip, sorry! He hates brushing his teeth, has to be reminded constantly and has dental checkups every 3 months to make sure the enamel hasn't eroded too badly.

Jesus Christ! I didn’t say he could have toothpaste, I said a tooth brush. Would you really permit a child to have toothpaste?! I like your water idea but both a glass and water seems extreme to me.

I have a 12yr old boy, he would certainly eat the chocolate. And I would have let him because life's too short and that's not a hill I want to die on.

A glass of water would wash away the fluoride coating from brushing his teeth. I'm afraid he just has to subsist on the Lynx particles in the air in his bedroom overnight.

People with Diabetes CAN eat chocolate ya know!!!!!

I’m sorry for accusing you of such neglect. I must have deeply misunderstood. Please allow me to repent my sins.

Maybe sucking on some ice is safer all round?

@Thunderpunt

Yes I know!! I was just grasping at straws and thinking there must be a real reason why you’d be so reluctant to not allow a bit of a one off treat! I cross posted with the op who then did go on to explain the tooth enamel situation which does go some way to clearing it up.

YANBU. Mine would eat from dawn till dusk if I didn't occasionally say no to them. I also would take away a chocolate bar at bedtime, and none of mine have enamel issues.

Also - I've recently taken all three of mine to the dentist - do not rinse after brushing, in fact don't use water at all! It's much better for your teeth.

Yes, I am always this controlling with my 12 year old son. I'm his parent Confused DH is his step dad and hasn't got PR.

A stepdad! That explains it all! I have never seen such disdain for "step" parents anywhere as I see on Mumsnet. How dare he communicate with your DS except through you and with your permission!! LTB immediately. If DD is his biological child, take her and never let him have visitation or communication as he will doubtless poison her mind with chocolate too.
It was one nice bonding moment between STEP dad and STEP son and encouraged a nice moment between brother and sister. All destroyed by the toothbrush witch!

Oh let him live

I would have turned a blind eye and let him have it, after all it was as a reward for helping out when you were ill.

Flip me. A one off treat of a crunchie. Poor bloody kid. Of course he’s eating everything he is a pre pubescent boy!!! And skinny…honestly totally ridiculous. I genuinely feel for the boy. You need to wise up a bit OP, you’re going to have to cut the cord soon.

I really want a crunchie now.

And Fanta
I don't even like fanta

It sounds like it isn't a common happening for your son? I'd have let it go for once. Its lovely that him and his SD have that relationship going.

If it's very regular, maybe have a word with SD about his timing.

I'm with you OP. My youngest also has enamel deficiency. He also hates brushing his teeth, ironically.
He'll also need braces and I'm struggling to make him understand they won't fit one if he doesn't look after his teeth.
As for the eating, that's normal, my eldest went back to this cluster feeding routine about a year ago. Eats endless amounts in the evening.

Toothbrushes aren't safe for chewing, but OP could get him some chewlry for the next time tooth brushing coincides with the need to chew something. Zero sugar, zero calories 100% safe, at least until they discover food grade silicone causes something more horrendous then obesity gateway drugs like Crunchies.

In reply to "Celery isn’t entirely calorie free. The kid has a toothbrush, let him just chew on that."
Quote fail 🤦🏽‍♀️

No, no way, NO¡!!! Ice is very bad for teeth if he should accidentally crunch down on it.

Ex ice cruncher here.

If I was your dh I would be giving that Crunchie back to ds & telling you to go fuck yourself. It was a crunchie, not crack or heroin.

Well I'm with you OP. It was past bed time, you are not supposed to brush teeth immediately after eating as it actually spreads the sugar, so that's a further delay to bed time. If he wasn't going to eat it, leaving a choccy bar in a warm hoodie over night is gross. I'd have done the same and given it to mine for breakfast.

I think you've shot yourself in the foot here. His step dad bought him a treat as a thank you for helping look after his little sister whilst you were ill. You confiscated it. Don't you want him to help out next time you're not well?

Definitely let him have it for breakfast!

I suppose it's too late to clarify my AIBU: WIBU not to trust DS to look after a Crunchie overnight instead of scoffing it...

Anyway, this went down a lot differently IRL to the dramatic scene of cross DH and sobbing DS some posters seem to be imagining. DH was laughing as DS scampered up the stairs, giggling wildly as I chased him. There was an extremely theatrical standoff in the bathroom where DS promised he was only going to admire it and would never dream of actually eating it. He then handed it over with a scowl, brushed his teeth and gave me a cuddle before hopping into bed. DH and I ate Nik Naks on the sofa (another gateway drug).

He's now up and has eaten the Crunchie for breakfast.