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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think we should be able to view a house even though we aren’t selling?

382 replies

HolidayHun2020 · 06/02/2023 15:39

So a house has come up for sale near us, we’re in a position that it’s not the ideal time for us to buy BUT for the right price and property we could make it work. Our house isn’t on the market but if we wanted to go for something we would put it up straight away. We plan to look at selling and actively trying to move within the next 6-12 months. I want to go and see this house as I saw it a couple of years ago and fell in love with it. It’s come up again, but the estate agent has said that we can’t view it unless we proceed with putting our house up and then if it’s a no from us on the house we are viewing we would then need to get out of the contract to sell our house!

AIBU that this is ridiculous? We just want to see this one house on the off chance it’s the one? If we offer and they say no under the circumstance fair enough. Should we just walk away until we are definitely ready to move.

OP posts:
PizzaPastaWine · 06/02/2023 17:46

YANBU

There are a handful of houses near me that if they were up for sale then I'd want to view/move.

My house could be on the market in days so it would hardly be a delay...unless the sellers had a cash buyer.

I understand you have to tidy up/put things away but it hardly has to be a show home. Besides, the last few times I sold the estate agents did the viewing.

I get that a few years ago when the market was booming you could pick and choose your buyers but surely now thats changed?

I'd put a note through the door to the sellers with your number. If they want you they'll call.

Highfivemum · 06/02/2023 17:50

To be honest it depends really. I have done this once. A house came on that I had admired from a distance with land. I viewed it and it was perfect. I then put my house on at a price to sell. It sold two days later and I bought the other one. I didn’t waste anyone’s time as I was prepared to take a lower offer on mine to get it.

Suedomin · 06/02/2023 17:57

You are ultimately a time waster and I would not have the time to arrange a viewing from someone who couldn't progressr
Not at all. My DD was in exactly the same position as the OP she liked the house so put hers on the market the next day. She is now living in the house she viewed. So certainly not a time waster.
I agree OP you should be allowed to view it. House buying and selling is a nightmare there is no point putting your own house in the market if you are not sure that you will be able to find anything suitable to buy.

BeckettandCastle · 06/02/2023 18:00

Viewing before yours was up for sale was common place when we bought our second house in 2006.

We weren't looking to move but saw a house we were really interested in. Viewed it, put an offer in and then put ours up for sale. Was sold within 5 days, on first day of us having viewings.

Ended up not going ahead with the original house due to issues their end but bought an even better one but wouldn't have even considered moving without being able to view the first house without ours being up for sale.

I understand why things changed over covid but wish it was accepted to go back to viewing houses without necessarily having yours up for sale first.

SchoolQuestionnaire · 06/02/2023 18:02

Obviously sellers can do what they like but I think being inflexible does rule out lots of serious buyers. Some people are just more impulsive but that doesn’t make them time wasters. We have always had a bit of a browse to see what’s out there before putting our house on the market. With our second home we weren’t even looking to move until we happened to drive past the house and see the for sale board. We rang up and got in to see it an hour later and had an offer accepted by the weekend. Our first home was on the market within the week and sold very quickly.

The vendors of our current home allowed us to view but refused to accept our asking price offer until we had sold. We could afford to buy without selling our previous home if we had to but they wouldn’t seem to accept that. We couldn’t be sure we would get the house even if we did sell so had to look at contingency houses as it took us a month to find a buyer for our home. They were so inflexible that we honestly questioned if they actually wanted to sell at all.

After lots of back and forth we actually found a better value home (we preferred the initial house but couldn’t justify buying it when compared to the other one, particularly when it was such hard work) and pulled out completely. The vendors then decided they were desperate to accept our offer but we had our heads turned. In the end we agreed to reconsider the first house but at a lower price. Had they accepted initially and not been so difficult we would have honoured our first offer and wouldn’t have been keeping an eye on the market in the first place.

It turned out the vendors were actually lovely and really reasonable so I’m unsure whether the issues were down to them or as a result of advice from the ea.

GoldenCupidon · 06/02/2023 18:05

If you saw it two years ago and didn't go for it, I can see why they might think you'll do the same again. Have you explained why it's different?

I worked in an EA one summer and it was a flipping eye opener. The number of people who'd go to a viewing and then announce that they'd love to live there in 3 years once they'd taken early retirement or the like - well it probably won't be on the market then you absolute idiot. They knew this of course, some people just like to look round houses, especially on holiday. It's selfish to the vendors, the agents and of course to any tenants or other people living in the house.

Agents don't get paid until the house sells so you can see why they're not desperate to take hours out of their day to take you around, essentially at their own cost as they are pretty sure you won't result in a sale.

Inapicklee · 06/02/2023 18:07

We were in this position.
Confident we had a very sellable house (3 offers at asking price first day of viewings when we bought it) and we were looking for a fairly niche property, most of which we couldn’t afford.

I found the perfect one. We were allowed to view and offered. It was initially rejected as our house hadn’t sold (or was on the market) so we went back with a 5k increase and asked a 2 week grace period to sell ours.

They agreed and we are due to exchange any day now.
The property we are buying had been on the market a while and just taken a price reduction. I doubt they would of accepted had they just come on the market

AlwaysLatte · 06/02/2023 18:08

I don't remember that being the case when we were looking for the same reason, a few years ago. But I have a vague recollection of being asked to provide the means (bank statements) so maybe without that they wouldn't have allowed the viewing. We didn't end up selling anyway, we extended instead.

magicthree · 06/02/2023 18:11

I'm not in the UK and I've never heard anything so stange!! Anyone can view a house here - in fact it is common to have an advertised time when there is an "open house" and anyone can just drop in, even just nosey neighbours.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 06/02/2023 18:13

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at poster's request

OoooohMatron · 06/02/2023 18:13

Nope. I would not be letting timewasters who want a nosey round into my house.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 06/02/2023 18:14

Oops wrong thread I'll report.

stripedsox · 06/02/2023 18:18

Another one saying no visit unless you are on the market. We went live on the market on a thursday and had a viewing day on the saturday of 15 appointments, four were no shows but we had three offers. Accepted the one that had mortgage ready.
Had told estate agents NO time wasters, which they respected.

CLLock · 06/02/2023 18:21

When we have sold houses before (twice) both times, we were doing so with a baby. We did actually tell the estate agents to ask the position of the potential buyer. If their house wasn't on the market, then we refused to let them view.

We did this in our first house because you couldn't really swing a cat in it, so every viewing, I left the house with baby, whilst husband showed the potential buyers around.

Second time around, we did it because it was taking hours to clean and sort/hide clutter for potential buyer.

ColdHandsHotHead · 06/02/2023 18:26

When I sold my last place, people who had obviously come round to have a look because they were nosy and lived in the next street drove me mad. They were even worse than the no-shows because you could tell they weren't actually interested. One woman criticised the internal door handles ('like something you'd get in a council house') and ffs, that wouldn't be an issue for a serious buyer.

Doris86 · 06/02/2023 18:37

clairelouwho · 06/02/2023 15:52

YABU.

Unless your house is for sale you’re just wasting their time.

Why is it wasting their time? The OP is a potential buyer who may well make an acceptable offer. If she decides to buy it won’t take long to get her house up for sale, but how will she know if she wants to move without seeing what she can get for her money first?

OP - I would be putting a note through the letterbox of the house, saying you are potentially very interested in it but the agent is refusing to let you view. I’ve done similar in the past, when agents have played silly games and not letting me view without seeing their in house mortgage adviser first.

FlatWhiteExtraHot · 06/02/2023 18:44

How on earth is anyone going to find a house to buy if you can’t even look at another one till you’ve sold yours? This is the most illogical thing I’ve ever heard?

So only FTB with cash funds are allowed to look at any properties? It just doesn't compute.

Alifeinaday · 06/02/2023 18:45

Rightmove/on the Market/Zoopla is for people like in your position. If you have already viewed once in person and want to see what condition it is in just check these websites.

WishIdDoneItYearsAgo · 06/02/2023 18:45

All of you saying no, what if buyers were like us and only interested in selling if they could buy your house specifically?

Maybe the fault lies with the EA expecting us to accept one of the 3 offers despite ‘the’ house having sold. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Nobody wants their time wasted but I don’t know what the answer in the Op’s situation which is very similar to ours.

Doris86 · 06/02/2023 18:47

FlatWhiteExtraHot · 06/02/2023 18:44

How on earth is anyone going to find a house to buy if you can’t even look at another one till you’ve sold yours? This is the most illogical thing I’ve ever heard?

So only FTB with cash funds are allowed to look at any properties? It just doesn't compute.

Totally agree. It’s madness that 70% of posters here think it is unreasonable.

Original poster
HolidayHun2020 · 06/02/2023 18:50

Thanks for all the responses, a real mixed bag for MN 😂 mostly IABU but a fair few I’m not. Just to clarify a few things…

  1. When I say ‘we saw it’ we didn’t actually view. We couldn’t afford to move then so only saw it on Rightmove! I would NEVER go and view a house unless we genuinely were in a position to buy sans current property being on the market this is the first ever property we are going to see (move in to this place straight from parents houses and was a new build)
  2. Since that time we’ve managed to save enough for the deposit for this house in question in cash, plus stamp duty is being gifted, plus equity in our current property & changes in salary etc
  3. I do think part of the problem is our house isn’t desirable in the area (two bed in a new build development) so could be hard to sell.
  4. The house is having viewing days rather then going round at convenient times so I don’t think by going we are putting them out if I’m honest

I also don’t think we are time wasters. We can afford it and would be willing to offer we just would need time to sell ours. I think that should be up to the sellers rather than the EA! I got the impression the sellers were fine with our position it’s the EA who have said it’s pointless as we won’t be able to compete with a market of largely cash buyers!

The thing is the system is broken. Say we put ours on the market and say the same thing ‘only those under offer’ it just becomes a cycle!

I am now in two minds whether to still try and view on the one hand, houses like this genuinely don’t come up often - this is maybe 1 of 10 houses that come up in our area a year and it’s completely turn key!!

OP posts:
Moveoverdarlin · 06/02/2023 18:50

This is standard practice and has been for at least the last two years. People will be snapping their hand off, they just don’t need to do viewings with people who are thinking about moving in the next year.

Original poster
HolidayHun2020 · 06/02/2023 18:51

Also as soon as this house went up I was straight on to our mortgage advisor to ask if it was doable and he said yes, so covered from that angle too!

OP posts:
Blondewithredlips · 06/02/2023 18:51

Selfish, entitled time waster comes to mind.

WishIdDoneItYearsAgo · 06/02/2023 18:54

Moveoverdarlin · 06/02/2023 18:50

This is standard practice and has been for at least the last two years. People will be snapping their hand off, they just don’t need to do viewings with people who are thinking about moving in the next year.

But it’s not the case that the OP isn’t thinking of moving for years. Just like it wasn’t the case for us. For us it was simply the case that we only wanted to move for that particular house.