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AIBU?

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Original poster

Rats. Should visitors be told?

87 replies

APlaceOfGreaterSafety · 03/02/2023 17:36

I’ve namechanged for this one.

I need some perspective on who is being unreasonable here, and I’m too close to this to see it clearly.

So.

Person A currently has a problem with rats in their house.
They’ve got in, they’re living in the walls, A and her DH have seen the rats on several occasions when they’ve got up in the night. This has been going on for a few weeks. Traps have been set, rats are ignoring them so far, and A is getting another rat catcher in next week.

Person A and Person B often meet up at each other’s houses, and have refreshments while there. Tea / coffee, biscuits, cakes, etc.

Person B has visited A’s house and had refreshments several times while the rats have been there. A did not mention anything about the rats to B until the end of today’s visit.

B is upset that A did not mention the rats before B’s visit, or at least before A offered B food and drink. B has a rat phobia, but B had not told A about this until today.

A thinks B is overreacting, and that there wasn’t any need to say anything as having rats in a house is nothing to be ashamed of, and also they’re dealing with the problem.

YABU = A is unreasonable, A should be telling visitors about the rats;

YANBU = B is unreasonable to expect A to have mentioned the rats.

OP posts:
Applesandcarrots · 03/02/2023 18:05

BlueHeelers · 03/02/2023 17:59

We’re all within 6 feet of a rat. We just don’t see them usually as they don’t usually infest houses.

B was unreasonable. Did she see any rates? Was she offered food rats had gnawed at?

no? Of course not. Well, why would she even need to know. She managed a whole visit without knowing and without even suspecting the presence of rats.

So as long as they didn't come to food and only come out at night, would they also be fine in businesses like cafes?

They wouldn't because you simply don't know what they do and touch. Vermin doesn't have to get into food for place to become health hazard (I know, bit dramatic, but I don't know "softer" version😂).

It's fine to be around outside, we don't generally leave our crockery and firniture (except washable one) there, do we.

Applesandcarrots · 03/02/2023 18:06

I see I crossposted while typing

ReamsOfCheese · 03/02/2023 18:06

A is being unreasonable. It's bad form to surprise guests with rats.

SarahAshley2 · 03/02/2023 18:08

We had rats or mice as we could hear them at night. We didn’t see them but someone from pest control came and told us how to get rid. We didn’t stop having guests over though! We would have noticed if we were serving food or drinks potentially contaminated by our fury guests I think!
Obviously if I knew someone had a phobia that’s different but you didn’t so it’s totally fine! Most houses have had rats or mice at some point.

PaulGallico · 03/02/2023 18:08

Get a professional firm to get rid of the rat infestation. A few traps will not do the job. You need all the entry points into the house blocking.

olympicsrock · 03/02/2023 18:09

I agree with others that overnight guests need to be warned but not a friend popping in for a coffee.

Anoisagusaris · 03/02/2023 18:10

I can’t imagine anyone continuing to live in a house with rats running around?? I live in the countryside and and obviously know they will be nearby but to actually sleep knowing a rat could be in your room…..I just don’t understand it. I do have a phobia but I still wouldn’t expect a person without a phobia to be happy with that!

RoseThornside · 03/02/2023 18:11

olympicsrock · 03/02/2023 18:09

I agree with others that overnight guests need to be warned but not a friend popping in for a coffee.

I also agree. If a friend told me they had rats in the walls but were dealing with it, I would be perfectly happy to pop for a cup of tea.

Thank God our house is too old for cavity walls. 😉

kittybiscuits · 03/02/2023 18:13

YABU

blackpearwhitelilies · 03/02/2023 18:15

It sounds as if A is trying to eliminate the problem. We had rats last year and first of all brought in one of the big national companies who were absolutely useless- in fact they made the problem worse. After weeks of calling them back we called in a local firm who were brilliant and sorted the problem in five days. I didn't have anyone round for coffee in that time, as I found it absolutely mortifying. I tried to persuade my husband that we should have an Air BnB while they were they, but they were costing us enough already. I'm still on edge all the time in case they return. It's a horrible situation. None of which addresses A's question, I realise. Sorry.

ChocolateMousewhothefucktookthisname · 03/02/2023 18:17

Rats and mice are 2 completely different situations imo. Rats in the house are a major serious situation. Anyway incidental.

I’ve had a rat infestation and I wouldn’t feel comfortable inviting someone in as a social visit whilst ongoing.

But if they were just limited to one area and a host knew for sure they weren’t going in the kitchen and all the food was sealed in containers and everything was kept sanitised, then I suppose it might be ok. Otherwise more sensible to wait until dealt with.

MereDintofPandiculation · 03/02/2023 18:18

OhClunge · 03/02/2023 17:41

Why are they ignoring rat infestation ? It doesn't sound habitable, I would want to know

They’re not ignoring it. They’ve had one rat catcher in, hasn’t worked, getting another in. Hardly ignoring.

Johnnysgirl · 03/02/2023 18:18

PriOn1 · 03/02/2023 17:54

I’ve never had rats, but have had mice. It wouldn’t cross my mind to tell visitors about them as to me it’s a bit inconvenient/unpleasant, but not hugely significant and I would throw out any potentially contaminated food.

I think person B’s phobia is highly significant here though. If person A knew about the phobia and didn’t give B the knowledge to allow B to make the choice, then it is a bit unfair.

So did A know about B’s phobia as that might affect my answer?

It might be very significant indeed to any of your guests! You don't need to have a phobia to be grossed out eating in a house where vermin are running round unfettered.

iklboo · 03/02/2023 18:20

Everyone hates rats.

Wild / sewer rats probably, but I love fancy (pet) ratties!

tillytoodles1 · 03/02/2023 18:23

I have a phobia of rats and mice. I don't ever leave my windows open in the summer because I'm terrified one would come in. I keep a full 5 ltr tin of paint on my toilet seat and keep it closed, and I always flush before I use it because I've heard they can get in that way. My neighbour puts my rubbish in the communal bins.

DangerNoodles · 03/02/2023 18:24

I'm so surprised at the amount of people who wouldn't give thier friend the option to decline an invite in these circumstances. I really hope none of you are my RL friends!

For what it's worth OP, I wouldn't judge you for having an infestation (I'm guessing you are A), these things happen, I just wouldn't fancy a cuppa! I would probably offer to lend you a cat or two until the rat catcher was available.

lmnabc · 03/02/2023 18:28

itsabigtree · 03/02/2023 17:53

No-one would be coming into my house until the issue was sorted.

This

Qwerty111 · 03/02/2023 18:31

DangerNoodles · 03/02/2023 18:04

Before the infestation would A be happy to drink a cup of tea in a cafe that had a rat problem? Probably not. I imagine she would aski be disgusted if she found out a cafe she had recently visited had a rat infestation which the owners knew about.

If I were A I wouldn't have anyone round until the problem was sorted, and it sounds like A needs to call in decent professionals before it gets even more out of hand.

Yes I completely agree with you Dangernoodles. Why is A inviting anyone into the house who’s not from a vermin control company?

From the post, A seems to be massively under-reacting to a serious rodent infestation, not sure I would trust that they had cleaned very thoroughly.

WonderingWanda · 03/02/2023 18:31

I wouldn't be in my house if it had rats in it, let alone entertaining in it. However, I would imagine that being aware of the return problem A is being extra cautious with hygiene.

StarDolphins · 03/02/2023 18:31

I had rats - they burrowed under a 2m patio to get in through the cavity & into the loft. Thankfully never got in the living area but I made sure not to invite anyone while it was going in.

YukoandHiro · 03/02/2023 18:33

Person A isn't "ignoring" the infestation. They have traps set, they're not working, they've had one rat catcher in and they're getting another.
We currently have mice that won't bugger off. It's not easy in an old house.

MichaelKeaton · 03/02/2023 18:34

Popping over for ‘refreshments’ at each other’s home sounds like a WI meeting. I like it.

I’m going to start using that.

Personally, I wouldn’t invite anyone over if I had a rat infestation. Phobias aside, I’m not sure anyone would be particularly keen to share a home space with them.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 03/02/2023 18:34

WTF is this A and B shite. just ask what you want to ask without complicating stuff fgs

InspectorPaws · 03/02/2023 18:38

BlueHeelers · 03/02/2023 17:59

We’re all within 6 feet of a rat. We just don’t see them usually as they don’t usually infest houses.

B was unreasonable. Did she see any rates? Was she offered food rats had gnawed at?

no? Of course not. Well, why would she even need to know. She managed a whole visit without knowing and without even suspecting the presence of rats.

You do know that’s absolute bollocks, right? It’s like the myth that you’re never more than 2 miles from a McDonalds.

Lollypop701 · 03/02/2023 18:39

Rats get everywhere. I’ve had them and they were a bugger to get rid of. Didn’t have guests till got rid

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