To think it slightly strange that school is encouraging this

[AsIfIWish]

Just got a letter from our school (sent to all parents) about attendance, starting with congratulations for good attendance, but then going into more detail of what they actually want. One bit says:

"Sometimes your child may be too ill to attend; however they could go to school if they have one of the following symptoms:
• Headache
• Stomach ache
• Ear ache
• Cough
• Cold
• Sore throat

I don't expect my kids to be 'wimps' as my dad would say (and I only let mine stay at home if they seem to exhibit quite bad symptoms - e.g. my youngest sometimes mentions something mild and I encourage them to go and then they bounce out happily at the end of the day) but likewise I do find it a little odd to be seemingly encouraging kids to go to school when ill.

Maybe these things are aimed primarily at those parents who keep their child off for every little thing? What do you think and what are your schools' policies? This is a secondary school btw.

I wish the schools would speak individually to parents. I'm tired of all these generic you letters when the people it really applies to are not reading them or thinking it doesn't apply to them.

I have 2 dd in secondary school 1st dd said in morning I don’t feel right just thought maybe her period, she still pottered and went off to school got a call half way through day she had projectiled vomited all over her class room down the hall and in the toilet got home she was fine that afternoon 2dd 3days later said she had a bit of a headache but did the same happily went to school and vomited all over the nurse halfway through the day, you just don’t know what’s going to hit yes this bug went round everyone in the house twice 🙄

Can’t say I’d appreciate a school sending me such a patronising letter. I’m more than capable of making a judgement call on whether my child is well enough for school or not.
I had a letter threatening the EWO for my child who has spent 4 weeks inpatient in hospital this school year due to a health condition the school are well aware of.

Same. My (single) mum was a teacher and had to work so unless projectile vomiting, covered in blood or unconscious, it was a case of ‘in you go and tell the teacher if you still feel ill at lunchtime (which I inevitably didn’t). Same rule applies to my kids I’m afraid.

I work in a school, and these notes are necessary in order to catch the attention of the type of parents who won't send their child in because they had a nosebleed yesterday. We also regularly have to send ones out that politely remind parents that if their kid has a raging temperature, is drowsy with illness, is vomiting, has diarrhoea, is crying with pain, has a rash etc- seek medical advice when necessary and KEEP THEM HOME til they're better. Contagion spreads like absolute wildfire in schools. You honestly wouldn't believe the state some kids get sent to school in. We had one before Christmas that had a horribly chesty cough one day. Parents collected early and sent them in the next day! They fell asleep on the bench taking their coat off and were so hot we recommended parents take them straight to urgent care. Parents were annoyed and said school should administer basic medical care.

There are lots like that.

Have to say, mine go in with most of those things. Unless it’s D&V which requires 48 hours after last ‘episode’ or something else requiring an isolation periods they generally go in with appropriate medication. I’d they’re really not well and are literally flat out then I might keep them off. DD has Covid before Xmas and stayed off for the required amount of time. She was devastated to lose her 100% attendance (and I mean devastated as she’s autistic and takes these things seriously). However her Covid cough went on for a month and she developed a sinusitis type thing as well which eventually required antibiotics and it took a good 5 weeks to get her cough, snot and headache free. I would not have kept her off for 5 weeks. Luckily 2 of the weeks were the Xmas holiday.

I am the same myself as an adult. I’m rarely off work. I’m a teacher. We pick things up from the kids all the time. I’d never be in work. There are some things that render me totally useless though and I do stay off and I always follow isolation rules for D&V type things.

I agree it’s all about ofsfed though!

My children loved going to school and had to be at death's door not to go. In fact I think only one of my 4 children has/had a day off due to sickness and that was covid (no symptoms but decided to test as friend tested positive). My eldest is a doctor and I think she'll be the same. My other daughter has a 9 month old who is at nursery but spends more time at home as they won't take him if he's not 100 percent

I can see this one from both sides.

yes some parents undoubtedly keep children home when they are well enough to be in school but then at the same time as the parent of a child who has health conditions which mean he is hit hard by illness then to a point I agree that sometimes a few days to let things clear is better.

So even though you were brought up that way you still think it's ok to throw a sickie???

I withdrew my ds when he was in reception to home educated as he was unwell a lot and I was told my threshold to keep him at home wasn’t in line with nhs advice (eg he had scarlet fever and they demanded him back 24 hours after starting antibiotics and I refused. They then wanted him in with hfm but he couldn’t eat as mouth so sore and his shoes made him cry due to the spots on his feet). The school were awful and said it was perhaps a parenting issue so I deregistered immediately!

What happens when the medication runs out in 4 hours?
We aren't allowed to give non-prescribed medications to children at school.

If my kids have anything like that I will give them calpol if needed and tell them to tell the teacher if they feel worse and i will come and get them. They are always fine once they get to school. Sitting at home all day when you have a minor cold or sniffle makes you feel worse.

It's secondary school. Most kids have a strip of paracetamol and/or ibuprofen in their bag. So they'd take it when the 4 hours had passed.

Missed it was secondary.

How much of the 'Mine go in unless they are at death's door' is simply down to convenience? What is that teaching children?

I didn't give a fig for figures if they were ill they stayed home and were cared for until I thought they were fit enough to go back.

I make a judgment call on coughs with my youngest as he has a really weak gag reflex and is almost always sick with a cough which triggers the 48 hour exclusion when he does that it school so even though I would send him in, they send him back home within the hour.

My daughter's secondary was the other end of the scale. When my daughter started with a stomach bug they phoned at 11am to say she was in the isolation room with a bucket and could I pick her up at 1pm to get her attendance mark. Obviously said no and went and got her.

Agree I suffered with earache as a child and also had perforated ear drums as an adult and it’s the worse pain, your whole head hurts, there is no way you could function

It's exactly this attitude that puts my back up with schools. Childhood is so fleeting, and secondary school shouldn't be a rehearsal for adulthood. It's a worthy stage in itself. Also 'getting kids ready for work' shouldn't be about suppressing their sense of self and trust in themselves. It should be about empowering kids have the confidence to make decisions for themselves. If they feel sick, telling them to suck it up and power on isn't healthy mentally or physically or in any way grown up.

School are totally missing the mark re:attendance.

The big issue is anxiety related school refusal post-Covid.

Many children found homeschooling horrendous and feel now feel unable to cope back in school. Cahms have had to close their doors to the huge numbers of children who would ideally have their help.

School continuing to pile on academic pressure, homework and attendance goals are just increasing anxiety. It is a self-defeating approach which is damaging this generation of children.

It's aimed at the kids who are perfectly fine on Monday, have flu on Tuesday and are perfectly fine again on Wednesday.

Or it's their birthday, or it's raining heavily or they've got an after school detention or they're going to in trouble if they come in. I do often wonder what the parents' attendance records are.

I was never off school. I'm never off work. My kids are never off school. Kids are in school from 830 until 330, give or take. Most of that is spent sitting down. They can cope. And we all know what it's life to wake up feeling shit, but be OK in a few hours.

I'd have thought that if you didn't send a child in when they have any one of those symptoms mildly they'd barely have anyone in!

I do think some people must be more susceptible to viruses than others.

I was speaking to some friends the other day and both said they genuinely don't think they ever had a day off school.

In my case, and that of my children's - we have all had many different issues/illnesses that resulted in time off school. Usually if they catch a cold type virus they will get a high temperature, red eyes, nose full of snot, sore throat to the point they can't swallow, wheezing cough, fatigue. There is absolutely NO WAY I am sending my child to school in that state. 1) They can barely even make it to the toilet. 2) As soon as they got to school they'd be sent home.

I'd love to know who these people are who keep their kids home with a "sniffle" - If I call school to say my child is too unwell to go in I might say they have a bad cold, but what I mean is that they are suffering from the above symptoms and not just a bit of a blocked nose. Surely the vast majority of people want their children to be at school and not hanging around at home?

This is absolutely disgusting and I think schools should be called out on this ludicrous behaviour.

I honestly believe some schools/local authorities have taken leave of their senses.

Totally forgotten what the purpose of going to school is.

100% agree with this and I also think that some kids who feel anxious might say they feel unwell to stay off school. This will then be marked as physical illness.