To think it slightly strange that school is encouraging this

[AsIfIWish]

Just got a letter from our school (sent to all parents) about attendance, starting with congratulations for good attendance, but then going into more detail of what they actually want. One bit says:

"Sometimes your child may be too ill to attend; however they could go to school if they have one of the following symptoms:
• Headache
• Stomach ache
• Ear ache
• Cough
• Cold
• Sore throat

I don't expect my kids to be 'wimps' as my dad would say (and I only let mine stay at home if they seem to exhibit quite bad symptoms - e.g. my youngest sometimes mentions something mild and I encourage them to go and then they bounce out happily at the end of the day) but likewise I do find it a little odd to be seemingly encouraging kids to go to school when ill.

Maybe these things are aimed primarily at those parents who keep their child off for every little thing? What do you think and what are your schools' policies? This is a secondary school btw.

My kids school has shown themselves to be more interested in attendance than wellbeing so I just ignore anything about attendance from school now. I’m a responsible parent and don’t need their input.

Any school that is ok with a member of staff telling kids that covid is over so they should be in school every day when one of the kids had just lost a parent to covid can fuck off. Oh, and period pain isn’t a reason to be off school either apparently.... according to a male member of staff, who would definitely know. 🙄

At secondary age you should be able to have a sensible conversation about how they are feeling. If kids stayed off as soon as they had any of those symptoms they'd never be in.

I send my DC in with everything except vomiting, fever and excludable diseases.

It's an odd and vaguely irresponsible list considering the sore throat, cough and cold could be Covid or strep - which are both contagious. Headaches and stomach-aches can also be pointers of more serious conditions. My DSIS is a paediatric and former high school nurse, she's wondering which medical professional suggested that list to them. It smacks of a school struggling with attendance and being quite reckless with their students' health. Although arguably most parents will ignore it and still make their own calls about their DCs' health.

“Maybe these things are aimed primarily at those parents who keep their child off for every little thing?”

Well there you go, you’ve answered your own question.

I work at a primary school where 25% of pupils are persistent absentees. This is a middle class, small school.

We get parents calling in because their child feels unwell - what does that mean? What's unwell about them? Be specific.

Or siblings off because one has a cough.

Sally has a cold and won't be in this week, she's tested negative for Covid but just in case...

Now I get that when you're ill you're not always able to function well enough for school. If a child is genuinely not themselves then it's much better to have a day to recover.

But you'd be surprised how many children are missing large chunks of their education through mild illnesses. This won't affect the school. In fact, teachers would rather not have to have any illnesses in class. But it will affect that child's long term opportunities in life.

So absolutely some parents need to be reminded that if a child is only mildly unwell, then dose them with pain relief and send them in. The school will call to collect if need be.

My parents were always strict about attending school and it definitely affects my work ethic as an adult.

Once on antibiotics a child can go into school with Strep. For the vast majority of people the infection is mild and doesn't do serious harm. Whereas missing school regularly is harmful.

Stomach ache without vomiting/cough or sore throat without fever = mine would be in

I don't see anything wrong with that list. It's reasonably good guidance for those parents who feel that if their child has a sniffle they should keep them home. This is the season for sniffles/colds/coughs etc and it's perfectly normal for many people to just get on with life if it's mild. Building a natural immune system after Covid is going to take time.

A real problem is when a parent's anxiety over illness is passed into their child causing the child to be anxious. Perspective is needed.

I wouldn't send my child in with an earache, it's so painful. I've had a couple as an adult and was in tears (not usually a wimp)! Other ailments on the list I'd send them in if mild.

Depends how affected the child was with the list of "approved" bugs as to if I'd keep them off or not - with DD1 it tends to be really obvious and I worry if she goes quiet and stops talking! It's my decision as a parent to make - not some gatekeeper at the school office though.

Thing is during the covid times they were really hot on that at our nursery. So many PCR tests!

To the posters saying a DC with a strep throat could go to school if on antibiotics:
In our area you’d need to keep the DC at home while you tried to get through to the surgery, waited for a triage call back and then either attended an appointment and got a prescription filled or waited to pick up a prescription phoned through to the pharmacy.
Turning up to the surgery without an appointment is banned and it can take literally hours to get through on the phone.

Hmm. I disagree. If the last 2 years taught us anything, it's that we shouldn't isolate ourselves to try to avoid catching mild viruses. 2 years of lockdown and restrictions have resulted in extremely high rates of strep A, chicken pox, RSV. More children have died as a result of these than would ever have died of covid. Not to mention the mental health problems, social problems in young children, anxiety in adults, etc etc. (I know the lockdowns and restrictions were not to benefit children).

I wonder if this is on the back of Covid and people feeling they should stay at home with mild symptoms in case it was Covid. Now the school want to go back to the no of 4 years ago so students miss less?

School governor here.

Schools have to have an attendance policy and you’d be surprised at the lack of common sense ‘some’ parents demonstrate, hence the prescriptive examples.

Ultimately it is what’s right for your child given a particular set of circumstances. Someone having a one off headache vs a series of cluster headaches under investigation with the GP is quite different.

The school is due Ofsted and they know their attendance data will prevent them from getting the grade they want. No matter how hard they work or what grades they produce, it's all out of their control because attendance is seen as the school's issue not the parent's issue.

Of course there are a minority of parents who need support and incentives to get their kids to school. Often they are parents with mental health issues and a poor experience of school themselves.

90% of what schools do is a tick box exercise for Ofsted and doesn't reflect the human opinions of the school leaders.

It's a difficult one. I have let DD stay off with fairly minor symptoms, but clearly enough that the day would be unpleasant. She is bright and never had any difficulty catching up, and on each occasion we knew there was nothing major she would miss. I really didn't think the damage to her education was going to be enough to justify a miserable day. If she'd done it a lot, I'd have been less willing to let her stay off, but it was only occasionally.

However on one occasion she had a really rotten cold and I really didn't think she should be going in, but she had assessments in both the first two lessons. She insisted on going in, and a friend took her to the medical room after the second lesson, and she was sent home. That did demonstrate to me that she was willing to push through if there was a good reason.

We get parents calling in because their child feels unwell - what does that mean? What's unwell about them? Be specific.

When my kids have been ill, I mostly just
say they’re unwell in recent years, as unfortunately the office staff like to gossip. Only when it’s been something like covid have I said the reason in more recent years.

So absolutely some parents need to be reminded that if a child is only mildly unwell, then dose them with pain relief and send them in. The school will call to collect if need be.

That hasn’t been done on a few occasions with my own kids and others I know unfortunately. I’ve arrived to pick my children up to find them asleep as they’ve felt so ill but school didn’t call me. My daughter was sick and they told her to have some water and go back to class. My friends son was injured in PE and despite not using his arm for the rest of the day and going to the nurse, they didn’t call home. He had actually broken it!

My parents were always strict about attending school and it definitely affects my work ethic as an adult.

If my kids don’t feel up to school, they don’t go. Their attendance is mostly good but there’s nothing worse than being around noisy kids if you feel rubbish. Some of my kids friends have parents who don’t let them have a day off unless they have a bad stomach bug. They say they dislike their parents and don’t respect them. I let my kids decide if they’re well enough once they were at secondary, they’re good kids and want to do well at school. They have a good attitude to their studies, one is doing a levels, works and volunteers so I don’t think you need to be super strict to have kids with a good work ethic. It’s just as important that they know for the future when to say they’re not well and need to rest.

I'll keep posting on here FYI.
Department For Education have issued new guidance to schools and LA’s - to be fully in place by September 2023. This is to combat the significant drop in school attendance since the pandemic.

www.gov.uk/government/publications/working-together-to-improve-school-attendance

Common sense isn't that common. Once you accept that, you realise why schools have to point these things out.

You'd think common sense would mean an obviously unwell child needs keeping off (so don't give them a ton of calpol and then magically be uncontactable all day, leaving your poor child upset and unwell at school/nursery) and if they've got a runny nose then send them in.

You've got to realise that some parents are the sort of parents who read "no trainers" in a uniform policy, go and buy an £80 pair of branded trainers and then complain that the school say they are trainers. School communications have to deal with that level of parental lack of common sense.

I'd not send in with earache, but I have one child with severe inner ear problems and ops so I know there's risk as well as pain for that one for us. The rest I'd medicate and wave off, depending on severity.

My three have over 90% attendance but had one off with a sore tum a day last week, fully recovered by lunch after a rather large poo and we had a lovely rest of the day together. I knew he was chancing it but hes top of the class in all areas so figured a day just us would do his mental health a lot more good than sending him in at that point. Mine are primary age. I probably let them have two days per school year where I suspect they're chancing it and they've only ever dipped below 90% when one had an op at the start of the school year. My kids mental health is just as important as academics but there definitely is a line.

Actually just checked our app, all 3 are above 97% so no guilt here.

DD is very rarely off with anything other than migraines, which are completely debilitating for her. She can get up with a mild headache which, even if I give her her medication as soon as she tells me, can be a terrible migraine by 10. It all depends on the point at which we catch it with the medication. If we've caught it in time, it goes within 30 minutes so shes fine for school. Sometimes she wakes up with a full blown migraine so obviously school is out of the question, and she's recently started getting the aura beforehand where she gets visual disturbances at one side. Sometimes if she takes her medication when that starts, it's fine. Other times it develops into a very very bad one (having the aura seems to mean if it does develop, it'll be bad). So if the aura started at 8.30, I'd have to keep her at home to see if the medication worked and if it did then I'd take her in. One day recently, she went to school fine, started with the aura in registration, tried to power through but by 10.30 was in tears with the pain and had to come home.

Mine would be sent with all of them unless distressed and or high temp