Page 9 | To complain about the lolly pop lady

Morph22010 · 2023-02-02T09:48:51+00:00

I have to drive ds to school about 10 miles away as he’s austistic and at specialist. No other viable way to get him there, we get a transport budget paid from council. I drive through a large village on way, not an alternative route. There is a school with a zebra crossing and lolly pop lady, have never really noticed much before just stopped when needed to then on my car. There’s been a new one there about 3 months and she crosses people across then if anyone is walking down road she’ll wait in road until thry get there then they cross as well. This is meaning the traffic can start to back up so there’s more of a wait in a queue than there used to be. There was a queue this morning, was in it maybe 7 mins then stopped again at crossing. Now the bit that’s annoyed me is that the parents were crossing back across the road and one had stopped and they’ve had a conversation in middle of the road, only about an extra 30 seconds but there were huge queues both ways. She seems a great lolly pop lady for getting people across the road but Aibu in thinking they should have some regard at least to the flow of traffic? My mornings are quite stressful anyway due to ds so I’m probably letting this stress me out more unduly

Everanewbie · 03/02/2023 12:04

Stop picking apart the OPs daily routine. The OP has said that the lollipop lady is gas bagging in the middle of the road and is stopping traffic when kids are miles away. Do she want the lollipop lady crucified? No. Does she want to sit there beeping and swearing from her overgrown chelsea tractor? No. She just wants someone to have a quiet word about being mindful of traffic flow.

Devoutspoken · 03/02/2023 12:30

Echo, I wouldn't mind in either case

Frabbits · 03/02/2023 12:39

Everanewbie · 03/02/2023 12:04

Stop picking apart the OPs daily routine. The OP has said that the lollipop lady is gas bagging in the middle of the road and is stopping traffic when kids are miles away. Do she want the lollipop lady crucified? No. Does she want to sit there beeping and swearing from her overgrown chelsea tractor? No. She just wants someone to have a quiet word about being mindful of traffic flow.

Exactly this.

The issue is that people stopping in the middle of the road to have a chat. The fact that one of them has hi-viz on is irrelevant.

It's dangerous and it's inconsiderate to other road users. If people want to have a chat, just do it on the pavement. Nobody should be stood in the road having a natter.

I bet half of the people repeating the tired as fuck "be kind" mantra are the same to whinge about being held up for 10 seconds by a cyclist.

GoodChat · 03/02/2023 12:43

Everanewbie · 03/02/2023 12:04

Stop picking apart the OPs daily routine. The OP has said that the lollipop lady is gas bagging in the middle of the road and is stopping traffic when kids are miles away. Do she want the lollipop lady crucified? No. Does she want to sit there beeping and swearing from her overgrown chelsea tractor? No. She just wants someone to have a quiet word about being mindful of traffic flow.

Some wild exaggerations in your post.

BankOfDave · 03/02/2023 12:44

Princesspollyyy · 03/02/2023 10:10

@BankOfDave

I doubt she would leave over someone gently correcting her. I'm sure she wants to do a good job?

And I doubt she’ll be ‘gently corrected’ following a complaint.

Everanewbie · 03/02/2023 13:21

GoodChat · 03/02/2023 12:43

Some wild exaggerations in your post.

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I was using figures or speech to illustrate the OPs point. Not we know the kids aren't "miles" away.

Original poster

Morph22010 · 03/02/2023 15:32

I went late today as I don’t have to travel onto work after on a Friday so can drop off later and managed to completely miss lolly pop lady so did whole 10 miles in 18 mins total

OP posts:

Ultraninja · 03/02/2023 15:36

BankOfDave · 03/02/2023 12:44

And I doubt she’ll be ‘gently corrected’ following a complaint.

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Of course she will. She works for a school. They're not going to sack her as a result of one minor complaint about her work. 😂

ZIEVAR · 03/02/2023 19:31

Were you Speeding at all?

Original poster

Morph22010 · 03/02/2023 19:35

ZIEVAR · 03/02/2023 19:31

Were you Speeding at all?

No you can’t really as it’s country roads so although they are National speed limit you can’t really go above 60 as there are bends

OP posts:

Choconut · 03/02/2023 19:52

You go at 60 miles an hour all the way? No wonder they need a lolly pop lady!

The problem isn't really the lollypop lady - it's that ds really struggles with leaving the house. I would look at everything you could do and put in place to make that go more smoothly rather than complain about the lollypop lady. If you put the issues up in the SEN section people may have some ideas that might help. It's not clear exactly what the issues are though so it's difficult to make suggestions.

Original poster

Morph22010 · 03/02/2023 20:54

Choconut · 03/02/2023 19:52

You go at 60 miles an hour all the way? No wonder they need a lolly pop lady!

The problem isn't really the lollypop lady - it's that ds really struggles with leaving the house. I would look at everything you could do and put in place to make that go more smoothly rather than complain about the lollypop lady. If you put the issues up in the SEN section people may have some ideas that might help. It's not clear exactly what the issues are though so it's difficult to make suggestions.

Only on the country roads not through the village

OP posts:

EchoWheresMyBrain · 03/02/2023 23:10

Choconut · 03/02/2023 19:52

You go at 60 miles an hour all the way? No wonder they need a lolly pop lady!

The problem isn't really the lollypop lady - it's that ds really struggles with leaving the house. I would look at everything you could do and put in place to make that go more smoothly rather than complain about the lollypop lady. If you put the issues up in the SEN section people may have some ideas that might help. It's not clear exactly what the issues are though so it's difficult to make suggestions.

@Choconut you see you'll be the perfect person to ask. How does this solve OPs frustration with the lollipop lady taking the pee with people's time in the mornings? I got the impression that OPs son is more year four kind of age (apologies if I'm totally off OP), so I would assume she would already know how to manage her timings? From my perspective, seeing people respond like you is surreal.

EchoWheresMyBrain · 03/02/2023 23:16

@Choconut or do you mean OP needs to be prepared to change her routine when there's a change of LPL?

Original poster

Morph22010 · 04/02/2023 08:35

EchoWheresMyBrain · 03/02/2023 23:10

@Choconut you see you'll be the perfect person to ask. How does this solve OPs frustration with the lollipop lady taking the pee with people's time in the mornings? I got the impression that OPs son is more year four kind of age (apologies if I'm totally off OP), so I would assume she would already know how to manage her timings? From my perspective, seeing people respond like you is surreal.

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He’s year eight but has asd so is in specialist so socially/emotionally he’s prob year 4 or younger. My routine is based around keeping him calm and getting him to school calm so that is why we can have such a variation in leaving times. As I said it’s not been an issue for two years until the lolly pop lady changed and even now it’s not even a major issue every day, it’s just some days we can get caught wrong if we happen to coincide leaving with a time we arrive at the lollypop lady when by chance she’s been waiting for ppl down the road so queue has built up so I can’t even predict the timings anyway. To be fair the other day was only time is noticed her chatting in the road as I happened to be at front, and we’d already been sitting in the queue for a while whilst she waited for people down the road then when she started chatting I just thought ffs this is taking the piss now

OP posts:

Emotionalsupportviper · 04/02/2023 10:53

PinkSyCo · 02/02/2023 22:16

I agree. People are so bloody intolerant and self centred these days. It’s sad that OP wants the lollipop lady to get reprimanded for swapping pleasantries with the people she helps across the road.

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Absolutely agree.

What if a parent had asked her a question as they were crossing the road? Should she ignore them? I'd initially thought that was two mums chatting in the middle of the road (that would have annoyed me), but if it's the lollipop lady and a mum, it could well be a simple question/ request and answer.

There's nothing to suggest that the mid-crossing conversation was a daily thing, or that they were swapping gossip for 10 minutes - OP says 30 seconds.

This woman is new to the job - give her a chance to settle in and get her bearings.

you really are directing your blame and anger at the wrong person here.

You really are.

EchoWheresMyBrain · 04/02/2023 10:57

@Morph22010 you see I do completely understand. I'm annoyed it's gotten to the point where you have to explain your every thought to justify your actions and feelings.

@Emotionalsupportviper "This woman is new to the job - give her a chance to settle in and get her bearings."

Well exactly. Every mum of a special needs child is new to the job every morning she opens her fucking eyes. How dare you expect a group of mums to give more weight to the potential feelings of an inconsiderate lollipop lady over the needs of a woman with a special needs child to vent when she is upset. What the actual fuck am I reading?

EchoWheresMyBrain · 04/02/2023 11:01

That lollipop lady signed up to that job knowing the needs of the parents and somehow, people seem to think we should hand her a newspaper and tell her not to try "too too hard love". This entire thread is surreal

Emotionalsupportviper · 04/02/2023 11:05

EchoWheresMyBrain · 04/02/2023 10:57

@Morph22010 you see I do completely understand. I'm annoyed it's gotten to the point where you have to explain your every thought to justify your actions and feelings.

@Emotionalsupportviper "This woman is new to the job - give her a chance to settle in and get her bearings."

Well exactly. Every mum of a special needs child is new to the job every morning she opens her fucking eyes. How dare you expect a group of mums to give more weight to the potential feelings of an inconsiderate lollipop lady over the needs of a woman with a special needs child to vent when she is upset. What the actual fuck am I reading?

My daughter is Asperger's. I've been there.

The world will not revolve around our children; we have to gently teach them how to cope with the world.

Where is your brain, indeed!

EchoWheresMyBrain · 04/02/2023 11:11

@Emotionalsupportviper well all I can say to illustrate my point is: if I had to assume something about you without knowing you at all, I would assume you were a lollipop lady, and not a parent of a special needs child. I hope that makes sense.

Original poster

Morph22010 · 04/02/2023 11:17

Emotionalsupportviper · 04/02/2023 11:05

My daughter is Asperger's. I've been there.

The world will not revolve around our children; we have to gently teach them how to cope with the world.

Where is your brain, indeed!

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I’m not asking the world to revolve around him, the only reason it is relevant that he has asd is because I have to drive him to school as he’s in a special needs school, otherwise if I posted without saying that people would have just said why don’t we walk to school to avoid the issue. At what length of time does it go from being ok to have a conversation in the road whilst holding up lines of traffic each way to not being ok? 30 seconds is ok apparently, what about 1 minute, 5 mins, 10 mins?

OP posts:

EchoWheresMyBrain · 04/02/2023 11:21

@Morph22010 exactly. Thank you. Please remember you asked about if the lady's actions were okay or not. And they may or may not be. But you didn't as if you're justified to have your own feelings. There seems to be a rogue group of people on this thread taking the opportunity to blame you for your life choices when you asked a simple question. I'm starting to worry about the effect these 30 second delays are having on our education system 🤣

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 04/02/2023 11:31

Yes, I would complain about her. She's there to keep pedestrians safe, not to prioritize them over traffic flow.

Original poster

Morph22010 · 04/02/2023 11:42

EchoWheresMyBrain · 04/02/2023 11:21

@Morph22010 exactly. Thank you. Please remember you asked about if the lady's actions were okay or not. And they may or may not be. But you didn't as if you're justified to have your own feelings. There seems to be a rogue group of people on this thread taking the opportunity to blame you for your life choices when you asked a simple question. I'm starting to worry about the effect these 30 second delays are having on our education system 🤣

It’s not even the 30 seconds talking, if it were just thst alone it wouldn’t be an issue, it’s just the thing that topped things off and made me go ffs this is taking the piss now. Poster above said about not expecting world to revolve around my child (which I don’t) but seems to think it’s ok for the world to revolve and stop indefinitely so that the children in the mainstream school can get to school safely without having to wait at the side of the road for a couple of seconds first

OP posts:

EchoWheresMyBrain · 04/02/2023 11:46

The issue is people not reading or understanding the whole question. As you've said, having a special needs child is relevant, not just because it explains why you would be more frustrated, but because it means it's clearly on a route to a special needs school. The strategic placement of that lollipop lady was poor, and people are too busy thinking you're saying 'woe is me' to actually see that.