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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To let DD shave her legs?

74 replies

hellodarknessmyoldfriend22 · 01/02/2023 20:32

DD is 9.

She's not started puberty in anyway but is worried about her legs being hairy. They aren't particularly hairy, but light hair has increased recently.

I think 9 is really young. Obviously I'd start her on electric razor.

Ideally I'd encourage her to wait but it's her body and I want her to have freedom to choose.

I remember hating my legs, wanting to shave and being told I was too young by my mum. I was probably about 13 and people had commented at school.

OP posts:
Dacadactyl · 01/02/2023 20:34

I wouldn't at 9. Not unless you personally think they are bad and noticeable.

I would also recommend waxing rather than shaving when you do start, but certainly not this young imo.

TakeMe2Insanity · 01/02/2023 20:35

Please please help her do it! My mum wouldn’t help me so I ended up using the blade of a craft knife at a similar age. Definitely take her through the options and let her choose.

WunWun · 01/02/2023 20:36

I would absolutely let her if she feels self conscious about it.

Slimjimtobe · 01/02/2023 20:36

shes young (I have a child the same age) but I remember being barely 11 and embarrassed so I think i would allow it

ironhelp · 01/02/2023 20:38

I would allow her, and teach her how to do it properly and safely.

I remember not being allowed too, so going and buying a razor and going to a public toilet and shaving my forearms 😵‍💫

KendrickLamaze · 01/02/2023 20:39

If she has an issue about something that's sorted so easily, just let her. DD was 9. She does it at good intervals so it's not causing an issue and she is so much happier. We have death white skin and I have black hair so faced th same issues at the same age. DD has fair hair but still noticeable.

Thatiswild · 01/02/2023 20:42

Yeah I’d let her if she wants to but I’d probably suggest the cream or something instead.

Original poster
hellodarknessmyoldfriend22 · 01/02/2023 20:42

I was also not allowed so stole a razor from my mum and ending up cutting myself badly.

Would definitely help her and teach her

OP posts:
SecretSophie · 01/02/2023 20:43

Yes, if she wants to. My mum didn't help me with anything like that.

NCSQ · 01/02/2023 20:46

Same story here. I was older (about 13) but my mum wouldn't show me how to shave so I just went ahead and ended up with razor rash all over my legs. It was painful and looked far worse than the hairy legs.

Soopermum1 · 01/02/2023 20:46

I've had similar OP, DD aged 9 is self conscious that her eyebrows meet in the middle. I assured her she was beautiful as she was but she was unconvinced, so I showed her how to use the tweezers, and told her only to tweeze a little at a time and only when I'm around so I can help if she needed it. She's happy with that, but I really struggled with the decision as she seems so young, but in the end I didn't want her to be teased for something that could easily be sorted.

Justalittlebitduckling · 01/02/2023 20:50

Tights for now and tell her you’ll talk about it in the summer?

SunsetStrip · 01/02/2023 20:51

I started shaving mine about the same age, just did it, never mentioned it to my mum. My dd was the same. When I mentioned it to her she thought I was going to tell her off as her friends mum had. She was really happy when all I did was tell her where my spare razors were.

GavisconNrennie · 01/02/2023 20:55

Absolutely let her.

changingforthebetter3 · 01/02/2023 20:56

I've already told my 8yo it's no big deal and I will help her whenever she wants me to. I was also thinking battery razor. At the moment she's fine in tights for school, leggings for PE, but she's happy that she has a choice when summer comes.

Smartiepants79 · 01/02/2023 20:56

Justalittlebitduckling · 01/02/2023 20:50

Tights for now and tell her you’ll talk about it in the summer?

I feel this is a good compromise.
She’s so young! Why is this even something she’s noticed?!
Personally I would be trying to get her to wait a little while to see if she’s really seriously bothered or if it’s just a bit of a passing fancy.
I think my Dd asked at a similar age and I didn’t say no exactly I just said I’d rather she waited a bit and see.
She never asked again and no drastic razoring has happened. She’s 12 now and it’s still boy come back up. I’d say yes now.
Mind you, you might find she’s less bothered when she realises what a faff it is and that stubbly legs don’t feel that nice!!

MoggyMittens23 · 01/02/2023 21:00

Mine does and is a similar age. she uses a ladyshave the day before she does swimming at school

Singleandproud · 01/02/2023 21:00

DD asked around about the same age, I bought her some bits and taught her how to do it safely and how to avoid cutting herself. Sometimes she does it, sometimes she doesn't but she has the option.

BakedTattie · 01/02/2023 21:02

Bless her. She’s very young. But if my 9 year old came and asked me, and I thought she was serious about it, I’d help her.

Scotty12 · 01/02/2023 21:03

Hmmm I’m not sure about that. What about using a hair removal cream?

Snapplepie · 01/02/2023 21:05

We all have stories about pinching dad's razor, using kraft knives or blunt bics, cutting our ankles up or getting covered in razor burn... the risks to your daughters health all seem to come from you stopping her and her taking matters into her own hands rather than you letting her and showing her how to do it properly. I'd let her.

Jimboscott0115 · 01/02/2023 21:06

Apart from any impact on hair growth (don't really know about this!) My question would be why not? If she wants to it doesn't harm anyone else do not sure why you'd ever say no?

OoooohMatron · 01/02/2023 21:33

As you said, her body her choice. Don't let her be self conscious about something that's so easily fixed.

Rinkydinkydoodle · 01/02/2023 21:43

I wouldn’t want my DD feeling uncomfortable either OP. Mine is 10 and also has v.v. hairy legs. She seems to be fine about it, so far, especially since there are more models now with visible body hair. She’s also seen beautiful young hairy-legged students on holiday in Europe. However, back in the day, I started shaving my armpits at eleven because someone said I was gross. I had about twenty hairs per pit - my mum strongly suggested I tweezed them but the thought gave me the creeps. Within a couple of years they were like a Cossack’s arse. I wonder if it’s legal to take a kid to get her legs waxed? If DD seriously wants the hair off I think that’s what I’d do, shaving is a lot of upkeep and hard to do without cutting yourself in the beginning. Suspect 9 might be very young for wax, do any beauticians know?

reluctantbrit · 01/02/2023 21:54

I would sit down with her first and ask her why. Was it a comment in school/swimming/dance school? Does she have particular dark hair?

DD started with a lady shave when she was 11 and started feeling weird during swimming lessons. It's a small thing but it makes a big difference.

She is now 15 and it's very much a "I do it in Summer but not when I wear long sleeves or trousers". I can't remember when I bought her new blades. They learn to be confident but as a pre-teen it is so much more confusing.

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