AIBU to not understand this recent trend of giving baby girls male names?

[LaLuz7]

James, Ryan, Dylan...

I can't wrap my head around the idea of purposefully choosing a very traditionally male name for a girl.

Why would you? What message are you trying to send? Why don't you ever see it done the other way around (female names for boys)?

I personally feel that if I had gotten a male name it would have made me feel like my parents really wanted a boy and were disappointed in me. It would feel almost spiteful and it would give me inadequacy feelings.

My other gripe with this is that it doesn't sit well with me from a feminist perspective. By giving girls male names (but never ever the other way around) you are perpetuating the idea that masculinity as a trait is desirable and valuable above femininity.

Can someone explain it to me?

In Catholic countries, 'Marie' or 'Maria' is quite often used for males, usually as part of a compound name (e.g. Jean-Marie) or as a middle name.

But it's almost always paid with a traditional male first name, so there's no ambiguity around the person's sex

That's not my name though. None of those names is Diana.

I can’t help thinking of a little girl who used to be a neighbour. I first met her when she was maybe 6, and the first thing she said was, ‘My name’s Robin and I’m not a boy!’

I suspect her mother had wished she was - her hair was cropped to about an inch all over.

Many males from Eastern Europe have Carol as a name including a couple of Kings of Romania and a recent Pope (John Paul II).

Yes, Carol is exclusively male in Easter Europe. No one would use it on a girl and if they did it would be regarded as majorly weird. Carolina is the female form.

See, I find that very sad

It's not new. My own name is unisex (think of an actress who's on ITV a lot) and i'm 53. I was at school with girls called Robin, Alex, Shirley, Jonquil and Jamie. Maybe the 70's were ahead of the game.

Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds have a daughter named James.

Me too, @LaLuz7 🙁

Michael Learned - the mum in The Waltons, and more lately Dahmer's mum in the mini-series.

But they weren't, they will have been Christine, Samantha and Joanne/a or Josephine. What the OP describes is different - it's like calling your daughter Christopher.

That is sad, but it’s also a very different thing to having a traditionally male named child who is allowed to be who they wish. As I said I have a man’s name, I’ve never met another woman with my name, but I was still allowed to do whatever I wished. I had long hair and short hair, I wore dresses and jeans, I played netball and rugby, I was a farm child so was always filthy in the mud sheering sheep, but I also did piano lessons.
My parents just liked the name. And I love that I wasn’t one of 20 in my school.

I know two women named Robin, no men but I am old enough to remember Robin’s Nest on tv. Just because a child has short hair doesn’t mean their parents wanted a boy. Jo Whiley named her son the unisex name Jude and he wore his hair long. Does that mean she wanted a girl? One of the girls in my DS yr 1/2 class had to have her hair clippered no.2 all over after cutting it herself when unattended.

Why does short hair on a girl equate to the parents wanting a boy?

I had short hair as a little girl as it was super curly and forever getting in knots - and I screamed when they needed brushing so a short hair cut it was 🤣

I grew my hair as a teenager/adult but my parents were right when they said it's a real PITA to care for!

@whataboutsecondbreakfast , it was the fact of the extremely short hair being coupled with the name, and the way the child told me, as if she’d been made aware of undercurrents.

I know it doesn’t necessarily mean gender disappointment - a friend of a dd had extremely short hair because her mother didn’t want the faff of sorting out tangles every morning and after every hair wash.

Probably already been said but “girls” names on men…
Shannon, Jesse, Hilary etc

Those aren't short forms of boys names, they are short forms of girls names: Christina, Samantha, Josephine. Male versions are also available.

Gender-bending names have been happening since before I was born. John Wayne’s real name… “Marion”. Im pretty sure sometime in the past some now traditionally girls names were boys names.
Glenn Close is 75. Stevie Nicks? Women and girls have been shortening their names to more “masculine” ones for ages. I went to school with twins called Charlotte and Francesca who insisted on being called Charlie and Frankie. Reese Witherspoon? Not her first name, but a “masculine” middle name given her at birth. I don’t think it’s a “trend”. It’s been going on for decades.

Actually, many “girl” names were taken from “boy” names.

I used to do research on name origins and many “girl” names were either derived from “boys” names or were used first as “boy” names and over time became used as silent “girl” names dependent on the culture.

Just by shortening certain names, and then using the shortened name as a forename or changing a letter, adding one with similar or same sounds were factors in how certain names became either masculine, feminine, and sometimes later unisex with immigration.

I agree! Absolutely not a new trend!

I think Hillary may have originally been a boys name.

I have a male name and I'm in my 40s and I'm definitely female.

When I was 18, one of the customers where I worked in a bar of an evening was called Tracy and he was a 40 year old builder.

Definitely not a recent trend!

Would you be happy calling your son Elizabeth? The fact is some names are too male and too female to be switched. My own shortened version I go by is unisex but there are some names that just aren’t unisex. I couldn’t get my head round Ryan Reynolds daughter being called James, I just didn’t get it.

The fact is some names are too male and too female to be switched

it is only ever that a name is too female to be switched.

I'm sure I read that when Florence Nightingale got named as a baby it caused great amusement in her parents social circle.

And it only became a common name for girls due to her.