Only poor people get the bus…

[EmpressOfTheSofa]

..I was told yesterday by a close relative. In the context of mocking me.

I get a bus to work. My bus stop is literally outside my house and ten minutes later it drops me off outside my work. I pay £70 a month for this.

If I drive to work it costs petrol plus £135 a month parking fees, and the closest two car parks are each a ten minute walk from work. It also takes longer to drive because of the one way system/bus lanes. It’s a no brainer.

But I got roundly mocked and told she wouldn’t be seen dead on public transport.

This was in the context of her admiring a new item I’d bought and I said oh funnily enough two separate ladies at the bus stop have also complimented it, she then shrieked with laughter and said there’s a weird contrast between having an expensive X and then getting public transport and that I probably look like a weirdo. That the only people who use buses outside of London are poor people who can’t afford to drive.

She’s bonkers, right? And a tad nasty? I’ve been stewing on this for a couple of days and shouldn’t let her rile me but ffs.

I grew up in the countryside and it was true that only those who couldn’t afford a car and/or who didn’t have a licence got the bus, along with people who had free travel.

I don’t know any wealthy people who live outside a city and who use the bus, other than those with free passes. I think it’s mainly due to the public transport system being poor, not being near enough to their homes and destinations and I suppose having the freedom to come and go as they please/not carry heavy bags etc

Public transport is expensive but will usually be cheaper than petrol, car insurance, car tax and car maintenance.

In cities, it makes far more sense to take public transport.

Your cousin was mocking you and wasn’t being nice. I would reply that she might be able to afford the expensive item herself if she used public transport herself!

I live in an area where houses go for an average of 2 million (not mine, alas) inhabited mostly by medics, architects and academics, all of whom walk or cycle everywhere. The Rolex equivalent involves people admiring someone else’s new electric bike or fancy child trailer. Though there are a lot of nice shoes too, actually.

I’ve spent most of my adult life trying to be acceptable to them/her and I’ve just about given up now.

So spend less time with this person.
If that's not an option - stop letting them get to you, & start taking the piss. Laugh at their ridiculous posturing. Tell them that only gauche wankers obsess over other people's money.

Tell her only chavvy people talk about "poor people". Perhaps buy her a DVD of the HArry Enfield "I'm considerably richer than you" skits for her next birthday.

😁 I love Harry Enfield and Chums 😂

She's being a ridiculous snob. Take no notice, the bus is less polluting than everyone using their cars, and you can have a glass of wine after work.

I'm impressed at your bus pricing though, It costs £5 each way into our local town, meaning £20 for me & ds to nip in on a weekend, compared to about £1.50 for diesel and free parking. Cycling in costs even less, ie nothing. Buses are definitely not for the poor in North Hampshire.

What a cow.

I know you're not in London, but most people here take the bus or tube. Nobody is snobby about it!

I have a lot of savings and still get the bus on a night out. I'm not snobby.

Ha. I don't own a car. I would bet I have a lot more disposable income than a lot of car owners, I probably spend less than £10 a week on average on transport.

Yes people rarely mention how much cars cost to run and maintain

Scumbling - not quite the same, that 'fancy bike trailer' has actually got a very practical use that can't be fulfilled by a 'non fancy' bike trailer, what ever that would be, whereas you don't need a rolex to tell the time

Round here no one takes the car in to town. You'd have to be mad. Busses are used by all and am no where near London

No not really. It's also filled with those with a phobia of driving and/or don't like taxis.

It's ridiculous! I have a car and could drive to work or the city centre but I prefer the bus for many reasons - better for the environment, less stress, don't have to find/pay for a parking space etc. Nothing to do with my financial situation - simply like getting the bus. Its the one time of the day when I can actually sit down, relax and watch the world go by.
Why is your friend trying to belittle you?

@ShakespearesBlister buses are £2 a trip at the moment in most places.

We live just outside a city centre (not London). We wouldn’t dream of taking our car in, bus works really well,, frequent in the city centre in 15mins.

Why indeed? This is the question I’m asking myself more and more recently. I used to just take it on the chin and she’d say ‘oh you know what I’m like’ but the older I get the less I feel like taking it.

Recently she told me my qualification was worthless (two years of study and top marks) because everyone passes apprenticeships and they don’t count. That my job isn’t actually a career (store manager). My hair is awful. I’m too skinny. Just constantly putting me down.

I never say anything like that to her. It’s a weird dynamic and I’m starting to not want to bother. It’s pathetic but I came home and cried after this last bout and I don’t want to put up with it anymore. I’m not perfect; I’m well aware of that, but I don’t need to be constantly reminded of all my failures.

Also, I don’t drive any more for medical reasons and she knows that, not something I’m thrilled about, so it was a particularly vicious swipe. Although I’d get the bud to work now regardless as it’s cheaper and more convenient

Speaking as one Empress to another you really don’t need this person in your life. I know you said she’s a relative but can you realistically lower contact?

In my semi rural area the bus services are being cut because no one uses them other than ‘just’ school kids or pensioners. When they’re gone there’ll be thousands of extra cars on the road (school journeys) and pensioners who are unable to leave their house. I would encourage anyone to use a bus if they can or we won’t have any!

Round here the bus is mainly taken by the over 60s with their free bus passes, students and people who live in the cheaper housing areas. So it's a mix but not a very diverse mix.

I take the bus once a week as it's cheaper than using my car and there are no parking worries. It does take twice as long though.

My main transport mode is my bike.

I am rich by median standards.

I love getting the bus. When I worked it was much much quicker and more convenient than driving (awful traffic, nowhere to park).

Also meant I could read my book for 45mins. And better for the environment. I know others who get the bus for the same reason.

I hate driving. Tbh, driving probably would have been cheaper than the bus. Buses could def be improved. But your relative is an idiot.

Good to see yanbu large majority

Why are you even in contact with this women? She sounds like a bellend. She mocks poor people, says nasty things to your face, she’s likely got other horrible traits…. Seriously why are you entertaining her?

If there was a bus like that for me I'd take it in a heartbeat, I hate driving to work because its so difficult to get parked, but its a 2.5hr, 3 different bus changes for me. Your relative is bonkers, and also very rude!