To wonder why I'm ignored at beauty counters

[Scribbydigs]

Every time I go into the beauty section of department stores and ask to try products, the staff just hand me things and walk off, disinterested. Other women seem to get sat down and made a fuss out of, and seem to have full faces of makeup put on them. (I don't even want that, I usually just want some advice on specific colours/products that would work for me).

Anyone else struggle to get help and attention from beauty counter staff? Is it just me? Or do any beauty counter staff have any insider info?

Because if they can pick and choose, they want to the ones who look like they can be persuaded to spend £££ on shite they dont need.

There is a young lad in our local boots, he wears a lot of makeup applied perfectly, he is lovely. He will serve anyone and give them all of his time and attention and (extensive) knowledge. I had been buying the same foundation for years until he put me on to one better for my older skin. My sister and I were in there , there is another woman who will do the old "up/down" to decide if you are worth her time, apparently we werent.

He served us and I my sister dropped an eyewatering amount of money. You could see her sidling over and trying to muscle in and DSis and I were both having none of it. I dont know if he made commission but I suspect he did and she realised that she had fucked up.

As Julia Roberts said in Pretty Woman "You wouldnt serve me.....big mistake...HUGE!!"

I've always found the Estee Lauder staff helpful

It might also be something to do with the time of day you go maybe… We used to work out our sales and ITP (items per transaction) score on a daily basis so we were always more keen earlier in the day as you didn’t know how the day was going to go. If, by about 3/4pm you’d hit your daily target etc you’d be much less inclined to do the full sales pitch. Just exhausted really. I mean ideally you should be full on sell sell sell all day but life isn’t like that.

I've only had decent service at beauty counters twice, one was with Clinique in my 20s when my skin was still stunning, the other was with No 7 in between Lockdowns from a lovely lady the same sort of age as me.

I'm very sorry so many department stores have gone bust but I absolutely don't miss having to work out how to get past the snotty snarky sneery salesgirls on most counters as you go in. Besides, I'm too old now to want to look like an Oompa Loompa with strangled spiders on my eyelids thanks which appears to be the current "look"....

I find that when I carry an expensive handbag I get top service, and plenty of samples. Regardless of how much make up I wear or how scruffy I look.

Well shows what I know. I wouldn't have expected anyone to approach me unless I ask them a question so maybe I've been 'ignored' without knowing!
What sort of unsolicited attention are other people getting?

@TheObstinateHeadstrongGirl Please don't use the name Karen in this way. It's such a misogynistic insult. Women have a hard enough time in the world as it is without insulting each other.

The ones in my local Debenhams were all really snooty and orange faced. With the exception of Benefit; they were very helpful and friendly.

I don't know why some people think that working on a Clarins or Estée Lauder counter makes them better than everyone else. I can imagine it's a very bitchy job to work in

Too young

They think you have no money

I used to be like you op until I worked out what counter the woman belonged to. Once I had one who was on their "right " counter they were happy to talk. These days I tend to just go to one as she is helpful non judgemental and really knows her stuff
I like her that much when her counter stopped in my local boots I followed her to the shop she went too (same complex) I know I am not the only one.

When I was young, slim, had great skin and dressed really well I definitely found the staff on beauty counters more attentive.

I'm fat and 50 now and pretty much get ignored.

I’ve mystery shopped in John Lewis for YSL and Charlotte Tilbury. I’m fat, over 60 and don’t dress up - unless wearing Seasalt counts. Despite never saying I’m looking for something for my sister for about £50 I’ve been treated well there. Maybe they knew it was time for a mystery shopper visit?

Like others above I get the best service at the No 7 counter in Boots.

I don't even work there and I'm forever recommending stuff to people in boots

I’m 44 and fat but they always pounce on me. Had a lovely chat with the YSL girl before Christmas. DH laughed afterwards and said ‘since when did you learn to speak ‘girl?’ He thinks I’m not interested in make up because he doesn’t notice.

If it helps, I’m ignored too. I am their “target” market age/looks wise and I wear a full face of makeup. It’s why I just order online these days. I went into town to buy some makeup for a Christmas gift and no one would come near me to even ask to get a few things out of the cabinet.

A lot just don’t really care unless you’re literally asking to have your makeup done. Which I never am as I’ve seen far too many women walk out of MAC with an orange face and a white neck to last me a lifetime.

I literally just go by the counters now to check a shade for foundation/concealer. Everything else I order straight away online. And to be honest, there’s enough reviews and swatches online I find myself needing to go to beauty counters less and less.

Don’t feel disheartened. It happens to my friends too who are all mid to late twenties, professional, attractive women.

This. When I was in my twenties and in my first decent job I made an appointment (by phone, it was the nineties) to attend the opening day makeover event at the new Laura Mercier counter at Leeds Harvey Nicholls. I was really into makeup, really into that brand and I was so excited.

I got to the LM concession after a long train journey and was stopped by a consultant who asked if she could help. I was so pleased, it all looked so glamorous. I announced my appointment time and took my coat off. She looked me up and down then took me to a desk at the side, glanced quickly at a large black desk diary and decided I didn’t have an appointment. No, they couldn’t fit me in. Another woman then stepped forward and asked me firmly to leave.

Meanwhile confident, tall, rich looking women were turning up and being allowed to walk past the desk with no more than a hello, welcome, have a glass of fizz. I was short, fluffy in all possible ways, objectively unattractive and clean but obviously not very well off. It was VERY obvious what was going on. I didn’t just leave, I ran, because I didn’t want them to see me cry.

I had spent months saving up enough to buy about five products that day. I still love makeup and even have some Laura Mercier but even at the age of 52 can’t go to a makeup counter without feeling like shit. Internet shopping all the way now, although from what I’ve read here, it might be time to venture out to Boots no7!

I agree with you there. All very uppity and often with very poorly applied makeup themselves. I’ve seen 16 year olds on TikTok apply makeup to themselves 100x better.

I don’t mean that in a mean way, wear whatever makeup you like, if it makes you feel good then that’s great. But don’t have an attitude to those who maybe don’t know how to do more than a basic powder and blush when you have patchy, orange foundation that doesn’t match your neck, muddy contour and blocky eyebrows that look like they’ve been tattooed on in the 90s.

That being said, the one counter I have found much more pleasant was Urban Decay. A lot of the women have amazing alternative makeup and they are genuinely lovely. I’d much rather have my makeup done by someone who’s an absolute magician with eyeliner and has the most amazingly blended bold eyeshadows.

Other women aren’t ‘being sat down and having makeup put on.’ They’ve booked a makeover. If you want a makeover you can book them.

I do feel like sometimes people want things but don’t want to communicate to other people. You ask them to get you something and they do, but you’re not happy because what you really wanted was advice? Why not just ask for the advice.

Because for a lot of women going to, what appears to be a glitzy makeup counter, is daunting. Especially if you’re new to makeup or have always used a few simple products like a face powder and one single eyeshadow.

How can you ask for advice if the women working on the counter won’t even look near you, to establish eye contact, to even allow you to show any sort of gesture that shows/states that you need help?

Not many people feel confident calling over to someone that you need help. But a lot of the time it’s that or you get ignored. So women often feel uncomfortable, they leave and the experience puts them off going back again.

Makeup should be an inclusive world where everyone can feel comfortable and able to dabble in it and try new things. A lot of the time it isn’t.

How can you ask for advice if the women working on the counter won’t even look near you, to establish eye contact, to even allow you to show any sort of gesture that shows/states that you need help?

Well… she could ask in whatever manner she asks them to get things for her, which she says they do when she asks.

OP seems to think the makeup counter workers are just wandering the shop and taking some favoured customers by the hand for makeovers - they aren’t. Those people will have booked/asked for makeovers. Same for advice. Many workers won’t want to approach people and offer unasked for beauty advice for obvious reasons.

It’s just making something out of nothing. ‘Some people don’t feel comfortable calling out that they need help.’ I mean, that’s not everyone else’s issue - people can’t read your mind. What if the person didn’t feel comfortable with being approached? What if they didn’t feel comfortable with being offered help? Customer service workers cannot be expected to read people’s minds and magically know what they want.

At almost closing time my teen daughter and I popped into Boots, lovely lady approached us immediately. We explained that she never wore anything more than Nivea but had a special occasion soon. She really listened and made her up, very naturally, perfect foundation match, explained best way to apply etc. The young girl from the till came over to chat as she loved makeup and then the manager came over too. We bought a few bits and the manager gave her a pile of samples, blusher and eye shadow palettes and a set of brushes, all free! They didn't push anything hard and seemed genuinely interested. I looked my usual low key (messy) self, I'm definitely not posh or a designer label person.

I was just in London. Was ignored despite having a hefty budget. I am ignored in the US too except for the one counter where I buy 90% of my skincare and make up. It’s extremely expensive but I don’t care. They help me and my skin issues are under control.

No joke, I am embarrassed to even share what I spend annually on skincare and make up. I could probably buy a station car. However, I’m ignored. You would think the other counters would have clicked by now. Nope, not a chance.

I always feel like they are trying to assault me with make up. I just want to ask one question and move on but they want to tell the the entire history of mascara and why I would look so much better in brown than black! I just want to move on but they take up half an hour of my time. I don’t feel like I’m going special or attractive or anything. I’m sorry though OP. I can imagine you must feel very snubbed. I would definitely feel bothered if I had the opposite problem. Maybe they should just stop treating women differently. Feels annoying and rude on both ends!

I'm not sure any of this is actually true. I think it may be perceived.

I've been approaching make-up counters since I was 15, so over 30 years and have never had a negative experience.

I think much of what has been reported here is poster's fear of make-counters that's being reflected.

I've never been rejected in the way described.