Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Driveway

108 replies

Edamcheese · 21/01/2023 20:27

Our neighbours of twelve years had their drive and pathway done ,two yrs ago. But they have now decided that because their bins have to be dragged up some steps on their property ,it is now inconvenient ,and are now using our driveway. They have never asked us if we mind,but it’s our private property . We have always been friends and they must assume we don’t mind.But it’s winding me up, but we don’t want a confrontation as this would finish our friendship,and why should we be made to feel that we are petty. We have given many hints ,that we have parked our cars in a way that it’s difficult for them to walk up our drive. But it’s inconvenient for us to keep moving our cars. She has told us that she choose to live there as there was no issues with shared driveways when she purchased her house,as she is adamant that it would not suit her but she is cheekily sharing our driveway, but we don’t our driveway used as a shared driveway either as we don’t want our cars damaged.

OP posts:
Edamcheese · 22/01/2023 22:24

This is what we have been doing every bin day and they couldn’t go up on our drive we thought that they got the subtle message.Then

they zig zagged between our cars,if we left a bit of a gap between the cars but then when we stopped doing it they started it again and this went on for about a year. We are now thinking it’s quite funny and have stopped being annoyed..I just wanted to get peoples opinion ,and yes its not worth getting upset about pig ignorant people who are utterly selfish and are greedy and just take what they want even if it doesn’t belong to them.

OP posts:
Hairybaker · 22/01/2023 22:52

Why don’t you say you’ve noticed leaks/mess from their bin on your drive and you’ve had to clean it up more than once, so would they please mind not wheeling over your drive in future.

it would really annoy me too!

DixonD · 22/01/2023 23:58

Just put some plants/lovely big boulders along the boundary.

donquixotedelamancha · 23/01/2023 00:11

pig ignorant people who are utterly selfish and are greedy and just take what they want even if it doesn’t belong to them.

They just think you don't mind. They think you are their friends and it isn't a big deal.

Yes, they should have asked but if you are bothered just use your words and tell them. You are an adult, act like one, it's ridiculous to decide your neighbours are terrible people without even speaking to them first.

Underminer · 23/01/2023 02:06

It would annoy me too, irrationally I suppose.

Get a Ring camera with siren. Set off the siren each time they step ont your drive and tell them they are causing havoc with your CCTV system and no you can’t leave it unarmed so they need another route.

🏆🥇 for the impressive and clear diagram.

WiddlinDiddlin · 23/01/2023 06:04

Time for some delightful planters at the end of her path/side of yours where she's stepping off her lawn ish...

Extra points if you grow something either really spikey in them OR something really offensive!

See if you can get to a point where they've got the cheek to complain to you, then claim you'd never noticed them doing that, but you'd rather they didn't as its so easy to scratch the cars with the bins/zips/buttons on clothing etc.

Cheeky fuckers can keep their bins on their own property, wheel them across their own property and just generally, stop being cheeky fuckers.

custardbear · 23/01/2023 06:44

Why don't you suggest they build a path across their lawn for bin access - this would annoy me too and I'd be a bit concerned if they used it as their route for a certain amount of years it could affect ownership /access rights on your property giving them sone rights to the access

Thatladdo · 23/01/2023 06:54

Honestly yes, thats a bit cheeky! I agree, but Some people are just like that and wont see that its wrong and on balance if its the only issue you have its not worth creating other problems over.
What i'd do, bearing mind your.... in your twilight years - not old of course
Its obviously binday and yous need putting out too, so put your out too, but put yours out behind your car in their path and see if they take them down too.
If they dont, then they are jerks and then say something.

Done.
:o)

DanaScully53 · 23/01/2023 07:07

I'm surprised nobody has suggested you start taking your bins down their driveway and see what they say.😀

HollywoodOrange · 23/01/2023 07:08

This would really annoy me too, OP.

It’s the fact that they’ve just decided they’d use your drive without discussing, which would have been the neighbourly thing to do!

I can only assume that those who have stated it wouldn’t bother them, would also be the CF’s in OP’s scenario!

HollywoodOrange · 23/01/2023 07:12

Also, first prize for the diagram! One of the best ones I’ve seen!

ExtraOnions · 23/01/2023 07:14

Plant some landmines down the border …

Aprilx · 23/01/2023 07:25

I could not understand what you meant prior to diagram. With the diagram, no I honestly just could not get even remotely worked up about this. Your drive isnt going to wear out because of bins being wheeled over it once a week and I am sure they can manage to wheel a bin without scratching a car.

piedbeauty · 23/01/2023 07:26

Talk to them! Just ask them not to use your drive! They should have thought about bin access when they designed their drive.

Or start using their drive to take your bins out every week and see what they say... 🤷🏼‍♀️

dexterslockedintheshedagain · 23/01/2023 07:26

Hide their bins! Then when they ask where they are, you could say, "well, where were they? On OUR drive? Why on earth would you put them there when you've got your own drive? Nope, haven't seen 'em. Oh dear, you'll have to buy some more now, won't you......"
NB: this is a light hearted reply, but it would annoy the HELL out of me so I feel for you

Whataplonkerheis · 23/01/2023 08:12

I would wait until the bins have been collected and then pretend to be a good neighbour and drag their empty bins so far up their own drive that it would be a bit of a pain for them to then have to take them up your drive to put them away.

America12 · 23/01/2023 08:17

It's quite annoying I can see.
I don't understand why your friendship would be over if you spoke to them about it ?

Raindancer411 · 23/01/2023 08:30

How about some planters put across the area?

BitOutOfPractice · 23/01/2023 08:35

That is top diagramming right there!

I couldn’t get upset about this I’m afraid op. I’d try not to worry about something that might happen and be glad I was saving my friend from having to lug bins up steps or across wet grass.

EyesOnThePies · 23/01/2023 08:38

It isn’t a confrontation to politely ask someone not to put their bins on your drive.

Just say ‘by the way, could I ask you not to put your bins on our drive please?’

If she starts with ‘oh but..’ say ‘Oh dear. But I don’t think using our drive is the solution. It makes our house look like a bin depot / we are concerned about you dragging your bins between our cars. Good luck with Whatever alternative you find’

You haven’t fallen out because of their CF-ery, why would you fall out because you ask her to stop? They feel able to co-opt your property, do you not think they have the confidence to hear a polite request not to use YOUR land?

MademoiselleTrunchbull · 23/01/2023 08:39

I'm with OP. I had neighbours who did this and I had to get three small dents removed from my car over a couple of years because the wind kept pushing the bins into down the slope into my car.

Patineur · 23/01/2023 08:53

They should have asked but, for the sake of a few minutes' use of your drive once a week I don't think it's worth falling out about it.

Bimblybomeyelash · 23/01/2023 08:56

yes its not worth getting upset about pig ignorant people who are utterly selfish and are greedy and just take what they want even if it doesn’t belong to them.

yikes! Why do I feel like one day you are rush out of your house and whack them
over the head with a spade!?

Patineur · 23/01/2023 08:57

They have "always been friends" but they're "pig ignorant people"?

LookItsMeAgain · 23/01/2023 09:03

Put a fence up. Any sort of fence. If your estate doesn't allow permanent fences, buy a few planters with lattice-work at the top to grow sweetpea or climbing roses.

Or simply tell them to stop using your driveway when they have a perfectly workable driveway themselves.

Lastly - what you could do, is if you go for a walk, leave your house, and walk in front of theirs and down their driveway to leave the property. See if they don't get ticked off every time you do that or when it's time for you to bring your bins out, do it through their property.

Swipe left for the next trending thread