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Original poster

Driveway

108 replies

Edamcheese · 21/01/2023 20:27

Our neighbours of twelve years had their drive and pathway done ,two yrs ago. But they have now decided that because their bins have to be dragged up some steps on their property ,it is now inconvenient ,and are now using our driveway. They have never asked us if we mind,but it’s our private property . We have always been friends and they must assume we don’t mind.But it’s winding me up, but we don’t want a confrontation as this would finish our friendship,and why should we be made to feel that we are petty. We have given many hints ,that we have parked our cars in a way that it’s difficult for them to walk up our drive. But it’s inconvenient for us to keep moving our cars. She has told us that she choose to live there as there was no issues with shared driveways when she purchased her house,as she is adamant that it would not suit her but she is cheekily sharing our driveway, but we don’t our driveway used as a shared driveway either as we don’t want our cars damaged.

OP posts:
Abitofalark · 22/01/2023 15:13

They should take their bins along their own drive or lawn or path. Why exactly don't they? There's a lawn between your drive and theirs. I don't understand this.
I have neighbours who take their bins along my drive every week. They'd have to move their car to use their own drive. I know it's a liberty, not a right but I don't say anything. They used to do worse, blatantly driving right across the whole width of my drive - not just encroaching by a few inches. Awful selfish people. That's the curse of open plan and people who won't stop unless there's a physical barrier to stop them.

Original poster
Edamcheese · 22/01/2023 15:20

That’s exactly my point we have steps too. For the first ten yrs she never came across our drive but since renewing her own drive she is using ours.

OP posts:
Original poster
Edamcheese · 22/01/2023 15:25

This at times has also been the case when they have three cars parked they can’t use their drive unless he moves it. But they should have thought about it more when they redesigned the drive. But it would have been nice if they had just aks us .we would have most likely said that’s ok .

OP posts:
AlwaysCountYourPennies · 22/01/2023 15:26

If you don't want to speak to your neighbours about it would a few strategically placed planters/pots send the right message?

vinoandbrie · 22/01/2023 15:30

Can you erect a fence?

mamabear715 · 22/01/2023 15:34

Can't understand people saying you're being petty. It's YOUR land!! I wouldn't be amused if it was happening to me.
I'd consider what @AlwaysCountYourPennies suggested re planters & pots.

pocketvenuss · 22/01/2023 15:35

Really hard to give ideas without a diagram. Planters? A trough with herbs? Park you car right up against the edge so they can't get past?

ShakespearesBlister · 22/01/2023 15:39

They aren't going to guess that you don't like it and they aren't going to stop doing it until you tell them to. The only option you have is to speak to them and stop avoiding the issue. The friendship is already over if they are taking the piss out of you as they just wouldn't do it if they had any respect for you. You could say the respect ended when they started doing this so you have nothing to lose anyway. Just tell them you don't want them putting their bins in your drive and if they don't stop doing it then put a fence on the edge of the drive to stop them. This isn't going to be resolved by not saying anything or by expecting them to read your mind. Yes they should know it's not acceptable but they are not thinking about your convenience, they are thinking about their own.

JudgeRudy · 22/01/2023 15:57

MeridianB · 21/01/2023 20:59

I can’t work out if they’re using your drive for their cars or their bins or to walk to and from their house. Or all three?

Neighbours have a new drive with their cars on it.Between neighbours house and their drive is a new path which is stepped. They could use this to wheel their bin out and bounce/bump it down the step but the don't.
They could also go around the drive on the otherside where they have a strip of grass but they don't.
Instead they go even further out and bypass their path, their drive and their grass and come onto OPs drive to wheel it down because (presumably) its a nice smooth run. They come pretty close to OPs car which is often on OPs drive.
They're trespassing.

JudgeRudy · 22/01/2023 16:03

Id start off with a 'hint' which would be you bringing their bin in and deliberately leaving it on their path by the step/on the drive/mid grass.
If it continued I'd just tell them to stop doing it. Don't allow/wait for an explanation. If one comes interrupt and say yes, but it's our drive. Repeat.
I'd risk a friendship over this because if they don't respect your wishes or they chose to fall out with you then it wasn't a good friendship.

EasterIsland · 22/01/2023 16:04

Just ASK them to stop!

NoSquirrels · 22/01/2023 16:22

If it really bothers you, have a word - Hey, neighbour, I notice you’re using our drive when you move the bins. Why’s that?

Then they’ll say ‘Cos of the steps’, you’ll say ‘Yes, it’s a pain isn’t it, we have steps too, I guess you didn’t think of that when you redesigned the drive?’ They’ll agree, you’ll say ‘It’s fine, but it would have been nice if you’d asked if it’s OK - I do worry about the cars getting scratched’ they’ll say ‘Sorry’ and you’ll all live happily ever after,

AgentProvocateur · 22/01/2023 16:27

You are being massively petty about a minor issue. And given that you are in your late 70s, there may be a time when you need to rely on your neighbours to take your bins in and out, so don’t make a mountain out of a molehill and cause an issue over this.

Snazzysausage · 22/01/2023 16:28

Well that's even worse,they are happy to drag bins up and down your steps but not their own?! Our back garden has steps in a couple of places and over the years stuff being wheeled up and down has taken the edge off in places so damage is possible. Could you put a note through saying "I don't want to be awkward and we do appreciate its probably more inconvenient for you but in future we would rather you use your own drive to put out and take in your bins." You don't have to explain or excuse your decision and unless they're as thick as a plank,they'll realise you're not happy about it and never have been. They should come round with flowers or chocolates but I bet they don't. You've more patience than me.

Original poster
Edamcheese · 22/01/2023 18:31

Here is a diagram arrows are the route they take. Sometimes my car is parked further up the drive. Where they pass very close to it.

Driveway
OP posts:
Theopossumwasmeantforme · 22/01/2023 18:36

Impressive diagram. Can you stop her access somehow?

Eastereggsboxedupready · 22/01/2023 18:44

Place a selection of nice planters where she would be dragging bins past...
Or invoice her for using your property
.

LicoricePizza · 22/01/2023 18:55

Cheeky fker IMO. You’re going to have to put some barrier up but then she’ll know why & then will call you petty for going to such lengths & you’ll be made to look the bad one.
So you’re going to have to tell her. Just be honest say it just bugs you esp as she never asked & worried re cars etc
Say you didn’t want to go to the passive aggressive lengths of putting up a barrier.

Or just hope she’s on MN🤣

Cornelious · 22/01/2023 19:02

It is cheeky for them to do that, especially without asking. I'd do what others suggest and put some planters/ flower pots along that area so that it's not possible.

Thewildling · 22/01/2023 19:09

Cheeky! I wouldn’t do it to a neighbour and I’m sure that if the boot was on the other foot she would be annoyed. Time to spruce up your garden with some nice plants I think, then if she continues, atleast you can address the issue of her destroying your new plants.

thirdtimeluckyorwhat · 22/01/2023 19:13

You need to get out more. If all you have to worry about is your neighbour walking the bin up once a week you are very lucky.

StillWantingADog · 22/01/2023 19:17

It’s totally fine just to tell them you’d rather they didn’t but I can’t see myself being worked up by this.

i thought you meant they were parking their car on your driveway. Yanbu to be pissed off about that .

pocketvenuss · 22/01/2023 20:09

A bit of a faff for you but if you park one car right along the edge part way down and the other car sort of next it it but nearer the house, she won't be able to get to the driveway until so far down it might dissuade her from bothering

Driveway
pocketvenuss · 22/01/2023 20:10

You'd only have to do it on bun night. She'd have to drag it along her lawn for half your driveway and she might then choose to go along her own path

RosaCaramella · 22/01/2023 20:33

OP this would really annoy me too. I’ve found that once people start taking liberties, they don’t tend to stop there.

No way would I want anyone (even my husband gets quizzed on this!) dragging a wheelie bin past my car in a tight space. Accidents do happen! Friend or not, your neighbour is being really inconsiderate.

When I lived in a flat and mid terrace house, I didn’t have my own driveway so I was a bit more relaxed about these sorts of things. But if you have your own grounds, you are entitled to have it the way you want it to be. I think you might have to place something (not your car) to block her shortcut.