To request WFH after Mat Leave ends

[Workdilemmahelp]

Hello, just want some thoughts & advice:

Before mat leave I was working in the office 5 days a week, in my final month of pregnancy I worked from home full time (was advised by HR due to working in healthcare/covid risk)

I am due to return to work in a few months and previously emailed in to see if I could WFH 3x a week, and office x2 due to nursery costs - I can only really afford to send DS twice a week. My mum is able to help look after DS on days I WFH, but cannot help full time as she also works mornings and late afternoons.

HR have said it is not fair on other staff and to work effectively I would need to be in the office more days than I WFH.

AIBU? What can I do?

You also can’t use your colleague as an example of unfairness. A school aged child and a baby are two very different beasts. It also sounds like she’s be putting in a solid stint 9-2.30 leaving for the school run, probably putting kids in front of tv while she does a solid few hours with no disruptions. May well work fine for the business. You doing a few hours and then looking after the baby is quite a different prospect.

Well, then why are you keeping it a secret?🤔

You ought to have used contraception or abstained then. You chose to have a child in your financial position.

Even if they said yes, what would you do if at 3.15pm, when you’re Mum isn’t there, and your boss wants you to do a quick zoom call with 12 colleagues but they baby has an o reflowing nappy because they have a bug? It’s just not possible. Also it sounds like you’re Mum is going to be very busy!

@op@Workdilemmahelp Colleague may be on compressed hours or PT.

It means we can pay our bills and I don’t feel bad at all. Nursery is too expensive and not everyone has family help. My boss is happy with the work I’m doing . Everyone’s happy

I wfh from home 60% and I have an eight year old and a four year old. I would not ever take any time I have my four year old as 'working.'

@Workdilemmahelp it’s possible if you need to . Ignore anyone judging. Sometimes we have to do these things to survive

@MintCho someone who can work fulltime could likely use your salary to pay their bills... you chose to have a child, you knew what nursery cost.

If you’re so confident it works for everyone why are you hiding it from your boss?
I don’t have any family help either, we made sacrifices and waited until we could actually afford a child for one thing, now I work part time in school hours so I can do every drop off and pick up. What’s the long term plan for you?! Just continue to be mediocre..?

They have really low expectations then. Imagine how impressed they'd be (and hopefully a promotion) if you worked at the actual speed and ability you are capable of.

Working from home with a toddler/small child is hell as many of us can testify to having it enforced upon us during lockdown.

I was on so many calls in which the toddler/child would need urgent attention and the poor parent completely harassed feeling that they were a bad parent/employee.

Everyone tolerated this as there was no alternative but everyone who experienced it said that it was not workable except for these extreme circumstances.

Employers know this which is why they would take a very dim view if they found out it was happening now, don’t do it and risk losing your job.

Your boss is happy with your mediocre work?

Wind them up and watch them go. 😂 Do any of you read other forums that talk about this one? 😬

Mediocre is working just fine so yes

It's not really about judging. If I found out one of my employees was doing this with it clearing it it would be a a serious situation. So is it worth risking your job? Maybe it is, OP needs to decide but also understand the consequences is it's found out.

Your boss is only happy because they don’t know the truth. Show them your posts on here if you’re that confident that you aren’t doing anything questionable.

My wound down amount of work is still getting everything done to a high standard and my boss is happy so there’s no issue

Well isn’t that lovely for you? I’m sure your colleagues are thrilled at having to pick up your slack.

This would be a disciplinary at my work if it was discovered you were working from home whilst providing child care. Fair enough one off if nursery unexpectedly shut or usual provider needs to dash off in emergency but not a regular thing

There are forums that discuss mumsnet? How weird.

I work from home and care for my under 1 year old. It’s basically impossible to do a full day but I am self employed so I take the hit. Husband works out of the house (lucky him).

My daughter goes to nursery 1 day a week and that’s the only day I get a full day done.… until I have to go and pick all the kids up from school.

Can vouch that it’s shit. Go back to the office for a break.

and you’re fine with being a mediocre mum too? That’s also ‘working fine’. Your poor kid! Please don’t have any more

I’m not slacking as getting all work done on schedule to a high enough standard my boss is happy. Doesn’t suspect a thing it’s not like I’m causing concern not meeting deadlines etc