To find new partners constant texting irritating?

[Supernova23]

We've been seeing each other for a couple of months but his demandingness and constant texting is driving me insane. Normally there are messages on my phone before I'm up in the morning and messages at various points throughout the day even though he knows I'm at work and can't look at my phone. Then more messages when he gets back from work, then more when I get back, right up until bedtime. Even my phone asks if I want to mute the conversation.

Is this "normal"? because it's driving me crazy. I've asked for a bit of space this weekend as I'm tired from work and need to catch up with things, but now he's ignoring me, so I can't win.

Call me cynical...

His reaction is just awful. Red flag city of course. If I were in your shoes I'd have the total ick by now.

Are you going to finish it?

Could you suggest not texting all day and just have a telephone convo in the evening?

That’s not happening I’m telling you that right now.

He doesn’t really, family are abroad, no siblings. He has friends but not many hobbies as such, mostly gaming and watching TV so not exactly stimulating.

I believe you. Heh.

Dump him - you’re not that into him and he sounds crazy controlling and needy.

The more you describe him the more worrying it sounds.

So you 'really wouldn't notice' him at all if he moved in.

There's about to be a terrible disaster where he has to stay at yours for 'a couple of nights' - the landlord will suddenly kick them all out in favour of a distant cousin, the flatmate will decide to attack him and rob his room, the roof will cave in just over his bed and the landlord will refuse to fix it, a gangster type is going to move into the room next door, an earthquake, flood, locusts, it WASN'T HIS FAULT.

You've got yourself a case of unrequited anotherwomanshomeaphilia there.

Please, block him before the locusts come.

Don’t get me wrong, he has good points. He’s educated, attractive, and has a decent job. But he’s extremely needy to the point where I’m getting the massive ick, and he doesn’t seem to get what I’m telling him. I’ve read the texts and he’s said he’s not angry at me for not wanting to see him today but it “upset” him. Really??

I was out yesterday and said I would be finished at 5, he text me at 5pm exactly.

Yick.

He'll have to go. Sorry.

He sounds like a 14 yo girl with all the texting. Ick.

Not only no, but hell no! Kick that one to the kerb!

I'd feel suffocated by the constant demand for attention.

He sounds like a stalker. There’s no way I’d continue the relationship.

Oh lordy, get rid of him please. He's 'not angry but is upset' because you wanted time without him and he 'gave' you all of 10 hours and now is laying on the guilt... He may have an education and job but he's no catch, if you stay with him he will close your life down until there's nothing in it except him

My dp did this, partly in response to me running scared (I was just in a funk). I told him to stop and he did, without question. He realised he was not the only person in my life. We’ve been married 25 years this year. If your dp won’t listen and sulks (how pathetic), you need to get rid.

if I’m newly dating someone or trying to work towards something then I’d probably expect contact once or twice a day with the odd long conversation when we both have time, but to be texting incessantly is really irritating and full on. It’s happened to me once and drove me so far up the wall that I had to tell him to F off 😂.

He sounds like a potential stalker op to be honest
Maybe Google him do bit of digging, see if he has any previous
Bet he would be a nightmare to dump

The texting in itself for me wouldn't be an issue. Any expectation that I will immediately, every time, respond would be a problem.

Based on your update, I am going to assume he gets shirty if you don't respond. Does he play the victim?..."it's just I enjoy being with you so much I feel sad when we are apart" or "it's only a quick text, shoeshine, I won't bother then. Some people are just never happy" etc.

Plays the victim. Actually literally just said what you said.

I had an ex like this once. Drove me mad. No life of their own and very needy/love bombing. It lasted a year but I should have ended it sooner. He would even call me when he knew I was going out and wouldn't get off the phone.

That sounds suffocating. I suspect this relationship has run its course. He doesn't respect your boundaries.

Hmm too intense and a bit stalker ish. I'd bin him off I'm afraid

Wow, this would drive me mad! His choice of words would worry me, what a weird thing to say - I'd be texting back "why would you be angry?".

Doesn't sound like the right fit for you, OP, to say the least!