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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you pay for this?

139 replies

Lockerlocker · 15/01/2023 12:02

Received a phone call from DS16s school last week to say him and another child had been involved in an incident where they had both kicked a locker, they have viewed the CCTV to confirm it was them. He explained DS would be excluded and we would be billed for the locker as they had damaged it. As there was two boys involved they bill would be halved. Fair enough. Makes sense we are billed for the locker.

Friday, I receive an email followed by the letter in the post yesterday to say that the single locker can’t be replaced so we have to pay for the column of lockers, adding that the lockers are on show in the corridor and it ruins the atheistic and the locker is now not functional. So I’m still sort of in agreement. The cost of the four lockers is £156.06 so our bill is £79.03.

Then I open the photo they have sent me (picture 1), the bottom locker is already clearly without a door (there is no suggestion that my DS was involved in this). I show my DS the photo, he states that it doesn’t look like the picture at all and that the girl is still using the locker. He said several of lockers have dents in and they have not been replaced. He has then sent me photos of the block showing the dinted lockers and the locker now.

I think I should only be charged for the broken locker and at a push 3 out of 4 lockers.

Not to drip feed, not sure it’s relevant, it’s an alternate provision. DS has an ASD & ADHD diagnosis. However I don’t believe he was having a melt down at the time of the incident.

Would you pay for this?
Would you pay for this?
Would you pay for this?
OP posts:
AhNowTed · 15/01/2023 13:44

Carry on making excuses for your son and this won't be the last time you'll pay out for his behaviour.

You're not doing him any favours here OP.

Bridgeth29 · 15/01/2023 13:47

I would be pissed off, but wouldn't want to ruin my relationship with the school and would want to show responsibility as a role model to my DS so would just pay. Then DS would need to do chores to pay me the money back in kind.

iklboo · 15/01/2023 13:48

op was going to pay, until she realised there was previous damage. Personally they could remove the locker door as they have done for the bottom one

Hardly very secure for the girl whose locker it is. Or doesn't she matter in this scenario?

Maybe the school didn’t know who broke the door, and didn’t have the money to replace it. Or it was accidentally broken?

They have CCTV footage of OP's son & another boy kicking it in

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 15/01/2023 13:53

One of the lockers - not in the OP's column - has been scribbled on, and on another the insert for putting a label on has fallen off. You'd think if the school were that bothered about the 'aesthetic' of their lockers, they'd have addressed those two very easy fixes that are spoiling it.

ShakespearesBlister · 15/01/2023 13:55

How do you know the one with no door isn't the one your son broke?

SamphirethePogoingStickerist · 15/01/2023 13:56

Tontostitis · 15/01/2023 13:14

Ffs pay it I can't believe people arguing about 'betterment ' and discounts are for real. Vandalism has consequences and £79 is cheap for what's he's done.

It's my job. I write check out reports for residential lettings.

My most (in)sincere apologies for applying my own perspective to OPs issue.

Jedsnewstar · 15/01/2023 13:57

picklemewalnuts · 15/01/2023 12:11

I think OP's irritation is that the damaged locker isn't the only damage and therefore needing to be fixed. It's just a bit more damage to an already grotty unit.

They are taking the opportunity to upgrade the lockers at OP expense.

This. I agree with paying for damage but they are clearly taking the piss.

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 15/01/2023 13:57

ShakespearesBlister · 15/01/2023 13:55

How do you know the one with no door isn't the one your son broke?

Because they sent the OP a picture of locker 'A31'.

SequinsandStilettos · 15/01/2023 14:08

It should be paid for.
Had this conversation on Friday with our caretaker.
Pupils have deliberately damaged the toilets again, obvs no CCTV there.
The cost is horrendous £££
They might not be so ready to sabotage if they know there are direct consequences.

Quveas · 15/01/2023 14:13

picklemewalnuts · 15/01/2023 12:11

I think OP's irritation is that the damaged locker isn't the only damage and therefore needing to be fixed. It's just a bit more damage to an already grotty unit.

They are taking the opportunity to upgrade the lockers at OP expense.

No. They are taking the opportunity to replace a row of lockers that have some wear and tear because a yob deliberately kicked one in. The previous condition doesn't excuse the behaviour.

NumberTheory · 15/01/2023 14:15

TidyDancer · 15/01/2023 13:09

I was thinking a third would be fair the whole way through reading this. Your DS clearly needs to pay (more as a deterrent for future than anything else) but it needs to be fair and reasonable. Since he didn't cause all the damage but all the damage is being rectified, it's more appropriate for him to pay a reduced bill.

Why is it fair and reasonable for him to pay more than the damage he caused?

He’s being punished already. Getting the locker fixed is not supposed to be a fine on top of that.

TidyDancer · 15/01/2023 14:18

@NumberTheory have you quoted the wrong person or maybe misread my post? I think you're agreeing with me (unless I've misunderstood your post!).

Mydogatemypurse · 15/01/2023 14:18

Just pay it

Tamarindtree · 15/01/2023 14:18

It shouldn’t matter to you what it costs because the right thing to do would be making your son pay by taking money from either his pocket money or savings to pay for it.

Marchitectmummy · 15/01/2023 14:20

Yes you need to pay.

diddl · 15/01/2023 14:21

If the door can be taken off then can that not become your son's locker & the girl given his?

PoloAllsort · 15/01/2023 14:25

Yabu. Pay up and also donate something extra for the wasted time the teachers and caretakers have spent on sorting the damage by your son.

It would also be polite to send an apology, explain how you have discussed the behaviour with your ds and you are in agreement with them that this was unacceptable vandalism.

You seem to be taking no accountability for this and avoiding decent reparations for the lockers and you and your ds relationships with the school.

Canttucky · 15/01/2023 14:28

It's a good lesson for your son.
Yes it is a bit unfair that you have to pay for the whole unit, and that there is clearly other damage, but life is unfair. If he hadn't damaged it, you wouldn't have to pay.

It wouldn't occur to me to argue. My son has SEN and I would pay for the damage then ask for him to pay me back, or do chores to cover it.

Survey99 · 15/01/2023 14:31

Or tell them you will get a quote and pay for a new door and a maintenance man to come in and fix it. Bet it will come to a lot more the, very reasonable, £79 each!

Just pay it. You are going to look a fool if you start negotiating for a reduction due to betterment/depreciation when the cost has only occurred due to your sons vandalism.

Survey99 · 15/01/2023 14:33

diddl · 15/01/2023 14:21

If the door can be taken off then can that not become your son's locker & the girl given his?

Then the school are still left with a locker without a door after summer when her son moves on.

ShakespearesBlister · 15/01/2023 14:33

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 15/01/2023 13:57

Because they sent the OP a picture of locker 'A31'.

Show quote history

That doesn't mean it was only A31 that he kicked.

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 15/01/2023 14:35

ShakespearesBlister · 15/01/2023 14:33

That doesn't mean it was only A31 that he kicked.

Show quote history

The communications quoted by the OP refer to 'a locker'. If two had been damaged, surely they would say 'two lockers'.

Original poster
Lockerlocker · 15/01/2023 14:36

The second photo is of the locker now, so the door has been pushed back in making it safe and useable. In the same way as the many of dented lockers. However as I said, I don’t think means we shouldn’t pay for that locker, or even really the two good ones above it. The fourth however is neither working or aesthetically pleasing as they say it needs to be.

OP posts:
NumberTheory · 15/01/2023 14:42

TidyDancer · 15/01/2023 14:18

@NumberTheory have you quoted the wrong person or maybe misread my post? I think you're agreeing with me (unless I've misunderstood your post!).

Sorry, Tidy. I misread you.

SinnerBoy · 15/01/2023 14:43

So, they've fixed the problem of the single locker he damaged, but want you to pay for the whole thing to be replaced, because it looks crap? And did so before he did his bit of now fixed damage?

If that's the case, it seems very unreasonable for them to ask for anything and simply discipline him.

If you bumped someone's car and they needed a bumper replaced, for £300 and they told you to pay £2,000, as the aesthetics were ruined; the alloys were wrecked, the bonnet dented and the headlight broken - not by you, nobody would be telling you to comply.

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