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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think DH shouldn’t quit teaching?

143 replies

mindyk · 12/01/2023 11:43

Slightly misleading title.

My DH is an outstanding Maths (and Economics/Politics) teacher. He is specialised in Maths so can easily teach Further Maths A Level standard (basically all pre-Uni level stuff) he also runs a successful tutoring company.

DH is a bit of a martyr. We have lots of outstanding / grammar schools in the area which he refuses to go to, saying the kids at bad schools need him. As a result, the abuse, lack of care from the kids and general issues with the profession means he wants to leave.

DH says he will take a pay cut but I know him inside out, the only way he would take a pay cut is because he can supplement with tutoring, this means any job that requires you to work past 5pm or doesn’t allow a WFH finish at 5pm on the dot is not possible.

Any career ideas for him? This is his requirements:

  • WFH at least half the week
  • Minimum £40k salary (he’s currently on around £55k)
  • Must be able to run the tutoring which he must start by 5pm-ish each evening.

his current school finishes before 3pm, he doesn’t bring work home 95% of the time, marking is easy as most kids can barely answer more than 1 page of a paper and he never works holidays. He tutors most evenings from 430pm to as late as 9pm Mon-Thurs. I personally think he should try a better school, maybe take on less responsibility and teach as a back up.

He cannot do tutoring full time due to security and we plan to move in a year or two, once we’ve bought the bigger house etc. he can go self-employed full time.

OP posts:
Nimbostratus100 · 12/01/2023 13:40

I agree with @Petronus , he wouldnt survive a grammar school.

Oigetoffmylawn · 12/01/2023 13:42

Honestly quitting teaching was the best thing my DH ever did. Our work/ life balance, and DHs salary prospects are the best they've ever been.

I would recommend programming, especially as your DH is good at Maths. he could do an 8 week bootcamp alongside working.

NothingBut · 12/01/2023 13:44

He’s very lucky to be in a school where nothing happens after 3pm requiring him to stay and sort out. No meetings? After-school clubs? Open evenings? Fights?

I did a day’s supply in a local school recently and couldn’t leave at the end of the school day as there was a mass brawl at the gates. Not untypical I don’t think.

Overthebow · 12/01/2023 13:45

He gets paid £55k and leaves at 3.30p each day with little extra marking and the school holidays. That’s a pretty good deal really. He would be able to retrain and start a new career but he would likely be on less for a while and would need to put effort in to progress.

mollynolly · 12/01/2023 13:46

'most kids can barely answer more than 1 page of a paper'

You're a fucking peach aren't you? Jesus.

'Bad schools'

Lovely.

milkymeg · 12/01/2023 13:46

I used to work in Ed tech and we loved having ex teachers in the team as advisors/ product developers. I was in sales so earned nothing close to 40k but some of the educational consultants would earn that or more

DottieUncBab · 12/01/2023 13:48

Actuary, lots of exams to do, but we just had a guy join few years back from teaching maths and he’s flying through the exams. Probably start on £35k but over £40k within a year or two and qualified c.£70k

MintChocCornetto · 12/01/2023 13:49

No idea how he fits in an SLT workload on 6 frees and has time to tutor in the evening

It sounds very much like there is an element of 'phoning it in' happening here

He doesn't sound motivated in his job

Riu · 12/01/2023 13:49

If he was doing something he enjoyed, he might not be so desperate to work from home. Most jobs don’t get the long holidays, so he needs to consider that as well.

Floralnomad · 12/01/2023 13:51

I doubt your husband is as outstanding as you / he thinks he is . Our son is SLT at a high school in a grammar area and if he leaves at 5 we all say he’s left early . Perhaps if he put a bit more effort into his school pupils and less into the tutoring they would be able to answer more questions .

Mugcake · 12/01/2023 14:00

My DP recently left teaching for the civil service, not quite 40k but about 35 and he can work flexible hours so can do tuition in the evening (he starts at 7/7:30) there's lots of different departments so worth looking in to. The recruitment is very slow though, I think it took about 8 months from interview to job offer.

Constantlybusy · 12/01/2023 14:09

This is a wind up surely? Perhaps to get press attention to show that there are really well paid teachers coasting along, leaving school early and doing very little work. Watch out! Expect to read a lot more goady posts if teachers strike.

Floralnomad · 12/01/2023 14:15

Constantlybusy · 12/01/2023 14:09

This is a wind up surely? Perhaps to get press attention to show that there are really well paid teachers coasting along, leaving school early and doing very little work. Watch out! Expect to read a lot more goady posts if teachers strike.

Good point actually

saraclara · 12/01/2023 14:18

Constantlybusy · 12/01/2023 14:09

This is a wind up surely? Perhaps to get press attention to show that there are really well paid teachers coasting along, leaving school early and doing very little work. Watch out! Expect to read a lot more goady posts if teachers strike.

I must admit that the OP raised my suspicions too. Doing an SLT job in a high school and teaching three subjects to A level outstandingly, is simply not achieveable without involving evening/weekend/holiday work.

saraclara · 12/01/2023 14:20

We have lots of outstanding / grammar schools in the area which he refuses to go to, saying the kids at bad schools need him

No he won't abandon the kids for a job at an oustanding school, but he will abandon them for a different career? The kids lose him and his outstandingness, whatever!

If this is real, I suspect that he doesn't want to go to the oustanding schools because he knows he'll have to pull his finger out, big time.

18e6281o62 · 12/01/2023 14:49

Forgive me if it's already been mentioned but he should definitely look at the Dept for Education. It's full of ex teachers. Ticks all three boxes. I imagine he'd qualify for at least a grade 7 job and that's normally 50kish.

flumposie · 12/01/2023 15:23

Another teacher here who can't believe your husband has so little marking, doesn't work on school work in an evening and instead tutors, without working over the holidays. This is not my experience as a part time or full time teacher. I have to do all of the above. Something isn't right about his job. I was also surprised at his age. I'm nearly 52 , 26 years of teaching and never known any teacher work the way he does.

Minimalme · 12/01/2023 19:23

18e6281o62 · 12/01/2023 14:49

Forgive me if it's already been mentioned but he should definitely look at the Dept for Education. It's full of ex teachers. Ticks all three boxes. I imagine he'd qualify for at least a grade 7 job and that's normally 50kish.

He will be required to do a fuck tonne of overtime though for no extra pay.

Huge job cuts in Civil Service generally and not much opportunity for home working since the post-Covid return to work push.

Minimalme · 12/01/2023 19:26

OP, you are look down your nose at non-Grammar schools, but if your husband's pupils can't answer more than a page of Maths questions then perhaps he just not very good at his job?

Onnabugeisha · 12/01/2023 19:31

Could he teach Economics for Open University? Or another online University?
So teaching but not at a brick and mortar school. Teaching for a Uni would probably pay more than an online sixth form.

There is also IFS- they have a lot of WFH economist type jobs.

He could get certified in tax accounting and do tax returns for small businesses….lots of that is remote and WFH as the businesses just give accountants read only access to their business accounting.

He could try journalism in economics…we need journalists who actually know what they’re talking about.

DinnerThyme · 12/01/2023 19:39

I’m a former teacher and married to a teacher. I’m a lawyer in the City. Starting salaries are about £55,000 so he wouldn’t need to take a pay cut except for when he’s doing his SQE course for a year (I think firms give about £20,000 tax free for that but he could also teach part-time and/or tutor to bring that up - it definitely gets more than the LPC did). Lots of former teachers go into law.

He doesn’t get out at 5 but he wouldn’t need to tutor and his salary would be over £100,000 two year after he started. He should definitely leave teaching, it’s shit and horrible. Hats off to those who can do it but expecting someone else to stay in that awful environment when they want to leave is just horrible.

Whewillmylifebegin · 12/01/2023 19:55

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Summerlark · 12/01/2023 20:15

To be fair maths doesn't change much at the high school level. You wouldn't throw out your lesson plans. I mean circle geometry is circle geometry. You can perhaps work on adding some computer graphics or doing quizzes or doing some hands on demonstrations I suppose. The thing is that children at bad schools don't necessarily need him. If they can hardly answer a question and are badly behaved and he is constantly stressed, he might as well work with bright children in a grammar school who want to learn. My husband is a statistician. He told me about visiting his old maths teacher from 7th form when he got his M Sc. Bright children from better schools can appreciate good teaching too.

One of my husband's relatives was a card carrying communist who was in China prepared to fight on the communist side during the revolution. As a very old man, he told me that he had started out as teacher. He had started teaching in a school in an affluent area and it had been fine. He had then moved to a school in a less affluent area. All his communist sympathies aside, he described the new pupils as completely feral, badly behaved and with no interest whatsoever in learning anything and he promptly left.

18e6281o62 · 12/01/2023 20:20

Minimalme · 12/01/2023 19:23

He will be required to do a fuck tonne of overtime though for no extra pay.

Huge job cuts in Civil Service generally and not much opportunity for home working since the post-Covid return to work push.

Show quote history

That's not my or DH's experience but appreciate all depts are different.

Itloggedmeoutagain · 12/01/2023 20:22

growinggreyer · 12/01/2023 12:48

He is not an outstanding teacher if he thinks that he can churn out the same lessons every year because 'maths doesn't change'. He is lazy and he knows he won't be able to get away with that in a better school. Stop listening to his flannel. If he quits this job you will not be buying the house you have your eye on.

This!
Marking is easy because they can't answer a page of questions.... This is where he should be doing constructive feedback
Who told you he was an outstanding teacher? What makes him outstanding?