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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you be offended?

29 replies

PoolBreachWatch · 09/01/2023 22:46

If a colleague asked if you just snack a lot at home? When you’ve never discussed your eating habits ever and just eat lunch at work (never breakfast or have any snacks at your desk)

OP posts:
dudsville · 09/01/2023 22:49

No. You're making and assumption and then being offended. You might be right, but why waste your emotions and time? My assumption would have been that they're rely into snacking and can't imagine someone not snacking.

Serialcatmum · 09/01/2023 22:50

are they insinuating that you snacking lots at home is why you’re overweight? (Yes, offended) or just curious about your eating habits and maybe comparing themselves? (No offended at all, just innate chatter)

AndyWarholsPiehole · 09/01/2023 22:51

No. Are you sensitive about your weight?

Blueberrywitch · 09/01/2023 22:51

I wouldn’t be but I’m not sensitive about my weight

DelurkingAJ · 09/01/2023 22:53

The only thing to do in such circumstances is to assume no offence could be meant (particularly for a passing comment). We all say daft, badly worded things occasionally.

I once had an otherwise delightful colleague say ‘Surely you must eat healthily in the evening’s at least. Then look mortified as she realised it could sound really rude. I was just relieved it wasn’t me saying it to her!

lljkk · 09/01/2023 22:53

I'd assume they are looking for a way to talk about their own snacking habits. The question is about them, not you.

determinedtomakethiswork · 09/01/2023 22:53

Do the others all talk about what they are cooking and you don't join in?

Chooba · 09/01/2023 22:54

I wouldn't think it's any of their business and would probably say so. But I'm a grazer and rarely have lunch when I'm in the office, so people think I just eat all day, whereas at home I stop and have lunch but don't snack.

Itisbetter · 09/01/2023 22:55

Do you always say “no thanks” when offered a snack at work?

pictoosh · 09/01/2023 22:57

Serialcatmum · 09/01/2023 22:50

are they insinuating that you snacking lots at home is why you’re overweight? (Yes, offended) or just curious about your eating habits and maybe comparing themselves? (No offended at all, just innate chatter)

This. So it depends.

Original poster
PoolBreachWatch · 09/01/2023 22:57

Perhaps I didn’t word it great.

It was asked directly to me “do you just snack a lot”

I wouldn’t say there are snacks to refuse at work.

OP posts:
Suzi9989 · 09/01/2023 23:04

I get this a lot! Am not offended, 2 doing ww, 1 on sw. Food is the main topic apart from work!

LemonLymanDotCom · 09/01/2023 23:06

Nope, wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. Don’t think I’d even register it as something to get upset about. But to each their own

ttcat37 · 09/01/2023 23:07

I would assume they’re wondering why I’m not very thin when I don’t seem to eat much at work. But I am a bit fat, there’s no denying it so I wouldn’t be offended.

DuplicateUserName · 09/01/2023 23:09

No of course I wouldn't be offended, why would I?

It's not like they've said I'm a great big snacky bastard.

AmazonsFuckedUpFreeMusicFeature · 09/01/2023 23:12

What is it lately with these vague asking posts.

BreviloquentBastard · 09/01/2023 23:13

Nope, I DO snack a lot at home a I'd tell them so. Wouldn't be offended at all.

custardlover · 09/01/2023 23:14

No. I would imagine they were thinking about someone else and were getting a data point by asking me, not that it was at all about me.

Poppyseed14 · 09/01/2023 23:16

DuplicateUserName · 09/01/2023 23:09

No of course I wouldn't be offended, why would I?

It's not like they've said I'm a great big snacky bastard.

🤣🤣🤣

UsingChangeofName · 09/01/2023 23:16

lljkk · 09/01/2023 22:53

I'd assume they are looking for a way to talk about their own snacking habits. The question is about them, not you.

This.

It wouldn't occur to me that this is something to get offended about.

pictoosh · 09/01/2023 23:17

To put it directly...are you notably overweight?

Yes - it was rude.
No - it wasn't rude.

SLS500 · 09/01/2023 23:17

Were you talking about eating and snacking?

It would be odd if they randomly said it and not in conversation

If I were sensitive about my weight I might be slightly offended. It would depend on my relationship with them and the context

Wakeywake · 09/01/2023 23:28

Well, what was the conversation about? I can't imagine a colleague coming up to me and asking me that out of the blue.

Original poster
PoolBreachWatch · 09/01/2023 23:30

custardlover · 09/01/2023 23:14

No. I would imagine they were thinking about someone else and were getting a data point by asking me, not that it was at all about me.

Someone asking if you snack a lot directly to you wouldn’t be about you? Ok..

OP posts:
Mehmeh22 · 09/01/2023 23:33

No i wouldn't unless they are very thin and looking down at me trying to imply im fat. But you've not answered that. Are you overweight?