Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Facebook and privacy

48 replies

Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 13:56

What's the consensus- is it ok to share posts on someone's timeline that they put as "friends only" with people outside their Facebook friends? Say sharing with a workplace, school, church?

Yabu- Facebook is always public, even if you think you only have trusted friends there, and it's ok for anything you post to be shared more widely

Yabu- if posted to a curtailed audience, it's out of order to share posts outside that audience that aren't yours without the posters giving permission

We're not talking anything illegal, racist, hateful etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 13:57

Yanbu for the second option, sorry. Yanbu if you think sharing outside the audience is out of order

OP posts:
Cigarettesaftersex1 · 09/01/2023 13:59

I wouldn't share anything a friend had posted unless it was with their consent

TeaStory · 09/01/2023 13:59

If it’s set to friends only then you won’t be able to share it outside that unless you screenshot and make your own post. That would be a shitty thing to do.

Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:00

Yes, screenshots, or printouts.

OP posts:
ComtesseDeSpair · 09/01/2023 14:03

Depends what it is. Their family holiday photos, not without permission (though why anyone would be remotely interested in sharing their friends’ photos with wider Facebook, who knows.) Some random quote or meme they’ve posted which you think is the most motivational thing you’ve ever read and want to share the joy, I can’t see the problem.

sometimes12387 · 09/01/2023 14:14

I would hate for anyone to share photos without content on the internet, however once that post is on Facebook no matter how many security features you think you have your entire friends list has access, and as you say can screen shot/share/do what they like with the photos. As far as I'm aware it's not illegal to re-share content - morally wrong though.

sometimes12387 · 09/01/2023 14:14

Consent 🫣

MeMyBooksAndMyCats · 09/01/2023 14:16

This is why I'm glad I don't have Facebook. Anything you put on there anyone can screen shot and you wouldn't have a clue.
Best thing to do is to get rid of Facebook or shut down your profile to your very nearest and dearest you don't need acquaintances from seven years ago you don't even talk too.

ThreeLittleDots · 09/01/2023 14:17

Overriding the person's consent by saving and posting screenshots elsewhere would be unreasonable.

Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:36

What about whatsapp messages? Screenshotting those, and sharing more widely?

Does it matter if it's one to one, or a group chat?

OP posts:
dicker · 09/01/2023 14:37

Are you going to tell us what you’re talking about or just continue the vagueness?

ClubhouseGift · 09/01/2023 14:39

Stop being so cryptic.

Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:43

I'm only interested in general. Not specific.

Someone told me that all social media should be considered public. I'm interested to know if that's a majority or minority view.

OP posts:
Igglepiggleslittletoe · 09/01/2023 14:47

If someone on my friends or family list went out of their way to screenshot something i posted on fb or private message on whatssap to another party without my consent I would find them and throttle them. All of my fb is locked down and it is a private account. Any conversations I have with people via whatsapp is the same.

If I posted something publicly somewhere and they did it well then it is my own fault for posting publicly to begin with.

sometimes12387 · 09/01/2023 14:52

Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:43

I'm only interested in general. Not specific.

Someone told me that all social media should be considered public. I'm interested to know if that's a majority or minority view.

What do you think Op

Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:55

Sorry- I thought it was clear what I think. I think that is something is posted to a clear audience of friends to take that (screenshot whatever) and share it is shitty behaviour of the highest order.

I think to do that is to be a total dick.

But someone else has said to me that "all social media is public, even if you think it's friends who you trust only".

I didn't know whether the general view is mine, or whether I've been naïve, and actually, the majority view is that Facebook is always public, even if only shared with a select group of "friends".

OP posts:
Itloggedmeoutagain · 09/01/2023 14:55

Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:36

What about whatsapp messages? Screenshotting those, and sharing more widely?

Does it matter if it's one to one, or a group chat?

I'm stunned that you need to ask

Hillarious · 09/01/2023 14:58

Yes, all social media should be considered public, purely from the point of view that once it's out there, realistically you can't avoid it being shared further. Don't put anything out there that you either don't want quoted back at you or you don't want to be circulated further. That's the reality of it.

Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:59

Stunned which way? Because WhatsApp is social media, and this person has said to me "all social media is public".

If you post to Facebook friends, you're communicating with those friends, if you post to a WhatsApp group, then it's those friends. Is it ok to screenshot either, neither? I think they're similar, sharing outside the audience is unreasonable and a dick move. But going by the poll, I'm wrong. I'm interested to know what others think.

OP posts:
MeMyBooksAndMyCats · 09/01/2023 15:00

You sound like a journalist. 😂

Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 15:02

I'm not. I'm someone who feels like I've been betrayed, but been told I haven't, because "all social media is public".

But after such a betrayal, I'm not posting details on social media like Mumsnet! Because then a journalist could pick it up, and my privacy will be even more invaded.

OP posts:
YetMoreNewBeginnings · 09/01/2023 15:05

WhatsApp isn’t social media imo. It would be akin to posting an email or text message on Facebook.

sometimes12387 · 09/01/2023 15:05

Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 14:55

Sorry- I thought it was clear what I think. I think that is something is posted to a clear audience of friends to take that (screenshot whatever) and share it is shitty behaviour of the highest order.

I think to do that is to be a total dick.

But someone else has said to me that "all social media is public, even if you think it's friends who you trust only".

I didn't know whether the general view is mine, or whether I've been naïve, and actually, the majority view is that Facebook is always public, even if only shared with a select group of "friends".

Well they do have a point. Look at YouTubers who have been quoted for outdated views in the past. It's why I don't share photos of my children on any social media. I can't remember what it is called, but people have been known to share other people children's photos as their own, and it's legal for them to do so if you have posted them on FB etc.

Original poster
Gnomeontherange · 09/01/2023 15:06

WhatsApp is defined as social media.

OP posts:
LCforlife · 09/01/2023 15:09

I think when you share things on Facebook/insta/TikTok etc you need to be prepared that your post could reach a wider audience than intended.

My settings are tight but I still don't share anything deeply personal.

WhatsApp is different. That's not social media it's messenging just like fb messenger, texts etc

If a message is sent on a private group then it stays there unless there's a really good reason to share it.