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Original poster

Had a panic attack on a work phone call

102 replies

Beingmumistressful · 08/01/2023 21:31

I received a work phone call this afternoon, i’m the on-call press officer this weekend. It was a broadcast journalist who was calling with a few questions and then said he was putting me live air to answer his questions live on air as a company spokesperson via phone. I then had a complete panic attack while the phone line was live on air. He had rang me through the out of hours weekend press line, with an enquiry that I was not aware of and had no time to look into and then after answering one of his questions he said he was putting me live on air then just went and did it, absolutely no time to look into his enquiry or anything. I’ve never experienced anything like it in 19 years in PR. The panic attack was while the phone line was live on air. I informed my boss straight away after, he’s since listened to the ‘interview’ (if you can even call it an interview as the journalist just thrust me straight on air with no warning or time to look into his enquiry) and has called it a “car crash of an interview” (for a few reasons but also because I had a panic attack). I’m pretty sure the approach that the journalist took is a breach of OFCOM rules but I will check that with our legal team tomorrow. My manager is talking about potentially suspending me for bringing the company into disrepute (by having a panic attack!)! Aibu to think they can’t suspend me for this (having the panic attack)? I’ve never experienced anything like it in all my years in PR and communications.

OP posts:
Shelby2010 · 08/01/2023 22:32

So as far as the listeners heard, you asked the journalist to email the questions in, then possibly a pause or the sound of breathing & then you hung up?

That doesn’t sound disastrous.

Heisenjurg · 08/01/2023 22:33

Mental health is health - doubt your boss would be blaming you if instead of a panic attack you’d had a heart attack… And for all intents and purposes, it is exactly the same thing.

NumberTheory · 08/01/2023 22:36

It was appalling on the part of the journalist.

I guess I would expect anyone fairly senior not to break down when pushed into being the public face, no matter how unexpected. It does reflect badly on the company.

But I don’t know that as PR manager you are that senior. And even if you are and that’s an expectation they can reasonably have, I don’t think it warrants suspension. Your boss sounds awful.

NumberTheory · 08/01/2023 22:40

Shelby2010 · 08/01/2023 22:32

So as far as the listeners heard, you asked the journalist to email the questions in, then possibly a pause or the sound of breathing & then you hung up?

That doesn’t sound disastrous.

I read it as she asked the journalist to email questions, then she was put on air and asked questions and she breathed hard and started crying before hanging up. Which I think would sound pretty bad to listeners.

1982mommaof4 · 08/01/2023 22:40

Did not want to read and run.. hope you are okaybOP

RethinkingLife · 08/01/2023 22:48

I hope tomorrow is less awful than you're thinking at present, OP.

Is this one of those events in life that makes sense of, "We have no comment at this time"?

Abigail69 · 08/01/2023 22:51

Re panic attack sorry to hear about that.
However, with your role, and your experience, one would have thought you'd be in your element.

You did nothing wrong but TBH, If I was you, I'd rethink if I was the person for this role.

Just being honest and wish you well and honestly, don't worry re panic attack I've seen it on tv with minsiters that were aware they were coming on to live tv.

Original poster
Beingmumistressful · 08/01/2023 22:52

NumberTheory · 08/01/2023 22:40

I read it as she asked the journalist to email questions, then she was put on air and asked questions and she breathed hard and started crying before hanging up. Which I think would sound pretty bad to listeners.

Show quote history

The journalist started the call by saying his name (and the station he was calling from) and then started asking me questions. I then asked the journalist do email me his questions, then I was put on air and asked the journalist again to email his questions and then could feel the panic attack coming on (breathing hard and then struggling to breathe after and cried for about a second or 2) so put the phone down.

OP posts:
WulyJmpr · 08/01/2023 22:55

Hopefully you realise this yourself, but your boss is a piece of work.

You have been leapt upon by hyenas and instead of sympathetically supporting you he's instantly resorted to blame.

If I were you I couldn't work somewhere with that culture. I hope you're ok it sounds an awful experience. Perhaps try to treat it as a learning experience and come up with some canned responses.

Original poster
Beingmumistressful · 08/01/2023 22:56

And then after putting the phone down I threw up

OP posts:
saltinesandcoffeecups · 08/01/2023 22:56

Did you hang up the phone before crying and throwing up?

Pearfacebanana · 08/01/2023 22:57

I'm so sorry this is awful. I also do on call PR and have never had this. Perhaps contact CIPR for advice?

Original poster
Beingmumistressful · 08/01/2023 22:57

saltinesandcoffeecups · 08/01/2023 22:56

Did you hang up the phone before crying and throwing up?

Only before throwing up.

OP posts:
BornBlonde · 08/01/2023 22:59

That sounds awful. Have you experienced a panic attack before? There are breathing techniques and other activities that may help if you feel one starting in the future

NumberTheory · 08/01/2023 23:00

Glad you got the request to email on air, I think that makes a difference as it will clue listeners into the fact you were being ambushed. It’s hard to know how badly the rest might have come across without hearing it, you seem to think it wasn’t bad, but your boss disagrees. Your boss sounds like a total dick but that doesn’t mean their assessment is necessarily worse (or better) than yours.

I’m really sorry you went through this, OP. I hope a bit of time will cool your boss down a bit and by Monday they’ll start being supportive and try to work out how to handle it better instead of taking things out on you. But if they don’t, please do talk to ACAS and see where you stand.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 08/01/2023 23:02

Beingmumistressful · 08/01/2023 22:57

Only before throwing up.

Show quote history

See it could have been worse!

Oh OP, I’m sorry this happened to you. My best advice at this point is to say “Fuck it” and pour a glass of your adult beverage of choice.

Tomorrow cooler heads will be had by all and you can figure out the next steps.

Urguth · 08/01/2023 23:09

Your boss is an arse.

i know you shouldn’t have to do this, but would it help if you were to reframe this as you had a medical incident/emergency rather than a panic attack? (I say this as someone who is currently off work recovering from something very similar, and this was the advice I was given when I sought help to recover)

you say yourself that you ‘think it might have been‘ a panic attack. You don’t know that. All you know is that you felt very unwell, had palpitations and then vomited. Could have been a virus, food poisoning. Anything….

the narrative then becomes:

‘ a journalist called, wanting to put you on air. you were feeling unwell and asked they sent the question through in writing. They ignored this, and actually put you on air whilst you were having a medical emergency‘

Now who sounds unprofessional?

NahNahNever · 08/01/2023 23:15

Herculesfan · 08/01/2023 21:40

Totally out of order by the journalist but it does sound like you didn’t handle it particularly well. Having worked in PR for 19 years I won’t say you’re inexperienced but the reaction certainly seems so.

I have been put into a somewhat similar situation in the past as a PR assistant and even then my reaction was to ask the journalist to email questions through as the situation was still developing and hang up once I was thrust on air.

Agreed. 20 years PR here too. Fairly common ploy and as soon as they say they're putting you on air, you disconnect the call.

Sorry OP!

BatshitBanshee · 08/01/2023 23:19

Urguth · 08/01/2023 23:09

Your boss is an arse.

i know you shouldn’t have to do this, but would it help if you were to reframe this as you had a medical incident/emergency rather than a panic attack? (I say this as someone who is currently off work recovering from something very similar, and this was the advice I was given when I sought help to recover)

you say yourself that you ‘think it might have been‘ a panic attack. You don’t know that. All you know is that you felt very unwell, had palpitations and then vomited. Could have been a virus, food poisoning. Anything….

the narrative then becomes:

‘ a journalist called, wanting to put you on air. you were feeling unwell and asked they sent the question through in writing. They ignored this, and actually put you on air whilst you were having a medical emergency‘

Now who sounds unprofessional?

Go with this, and reframe it to your boss as you thought it was similar to a panic attack but following medical advice, I believe it to have been a medical emergency.

FWIW OP, that "journalist" is about to get the bollocking of his life from this. You do not, ever, land someone live on air with no prior warning - especially when all they clearly have to say is "Please email through your questions and I'll take a look into this".

Your boss has reacted very, very poorly but I will be very surprised if you don't have an apology from the station come the morning - for nothing else than to cover their own arses. No one wants to make enemies out of OOH POs.

Doyathinkhesaurus · 08/01/2023 23:20

Were you clear with him you did not want to do an interview?

I only know radio but unless it was a very small station, a producer would have called you. You can't present and research at the same time in a live phone-in/news programme. Was he playing a pre-recorded package and talking to you? If it's not news programming then you have to wait for a song to call someone.
If he wanted you on air he would have had to tell you he was putting you on air, put you on hold, check you were there through the desk, talk to you for level, find a point in the live show to intro the story and introduce you. That all takes time and isn't simple if someone is saying they don't want to go on air. He would have been checking you had not put the phone down by talking to you on talk-back.
I think you would have had plenty of time to disappear off the line even if he was being pushy. I'm sorry you had a panic attack over it.

Christmaspyjamas · 08/01/2023 23:24

Marketing / PR person here.

Also savvy survivor of two illegal attempted dismissals.

Journo is in the wrong.

Boss is in the wrong.

Do not speak to boss. Keep everything on email. Do not use words like panic attack. Do not discuss your emotions with him.

Get on top of any outstanding queries from the journalist/ internal briefings or factfinding as a priority.

Use Google Alerts and social media monitoring tools to quantify any impact on brand reputation (SM and web team can help with this) over next week.

Write an email to your boss and his superior with these facts and your advice that:

A) Your reaction was far less harmful to company than the original incident

B) Advice as to ongoing management if this issue

C) Advice as to protocols for out of hours line etc

Would love to have seen how your twat of a boss would have fared.

Chin up girl.

Ahnobother · 08/01/2023 23:31

Not much to add OP other than I also have worked for 20+ years in PR and that's a really shitty thing for someone to have done to you.
I was berated on the phone once by a very very senior businessman who had expected more coverage than I was able to secure for his (poxy navel-gazing) announcement. He was apoplectic because my boss told him we'd get lots of coverage and then dumped it all on me to do knowing it was a shitty story. I told him I wouldn't be spoken to like that and I'd done my best and then hung up.
I went home and cried my eyes out so much I gave myself a two day migraine.

Your boss is a complete git for that reaction. Was it ideal? No. But to immediately show such a lack of support is just shitty.

I hope you're ok. Tomorrow is another day. Good luck.

Aussiegirl123456 · 08/01/2023 23:52

Beingmumistressful · 08/01/2023 22:05

Started breathing really quickly and crying. And then couldn’t breathe properly and like my head was hurting and everything was spinning and felt like I was going to faint as couldn’t breathe properly. It was pretty clear to the journalist that I was having a panic attack. I did hang up the phone when starting to have a panic attack.

Show quote history

I don’t understand because your posts are somewhat contradictory. Did you have the panic attack live on air or did you hang up when you started having the panic attack. It’s a lot to happen in just 2-5 seconds, as well as asking them to email you questions.

If this is true then your boss is an unsupportive arsehole who I wouldn’t want to work for, so I’d be looking for a new environment.

Report the journalist.

justasking111 · 09/01/2023 00:01

Beingmumistressful · 08/01/2023 22:56

And then after putting the phone down I threw up

You're in esteemed company. Princess Diana fainted, George Bush threw up under the table at a dinner and Biden wet himself recently. You're only human 💐

ItWasDobbinAtTheMareAndSpare · 09/01/2023 00:07

I’m sorry that happened to you. Flowers