To give a cash reward to the twin who gets the best GCSE results?

[Stackss]

DS and DD are both in year 11 so have their GCSEs coming up shortly. Both are bright and of very similar if not identical academic ability and are predicted very similar grades.

Both are relatively hard working (although with a tendency to coast) but DH and I would really like them to knuckle down and push themselves to get the best grades possible.

We therefore came up with the idea of an effort-based reward scheme allowing them to earn treats for completing revision- e.g. 75 hours= a meal out, 150 hours= a night away etc.

However, both twins have suggested that instead, the twin who gets the best results should receive the whole cash reward. They are both competitive with each other and have said this would give them greater incentive to work harder.

My concern is that the twin who doesn't do as well will be doubly disappointed on results day as they will also get no reward. Should I go with the twins' suggestion?

No.

This is awful, in every way.

Learning is its own reward, but if you need something extra, that is the satisfaction of getting grade itself! they don't need extra rewards. At that age they are more than old enough to be able to understand that.

The entire set up sounds awful, stressful, complicated and unnecessary. Why isn’t a verbal congratulations, a hug and going out for a family celebratory meal enough?

OP, assuming this is a serious thread, you are raising your children to understand the price of everything, but the value of nothing,

I find this quite fascinating and I agree,.

I have a child with autism who was anxious to the point that he was a school refuser and ended up home educated for the entire secondary education.

He couldn't cope if he felt work was a demand.

But he. was self motivated and did GCSE's without any push from me from online sources and is now at 6th form and is predicted As at A levels. A lot of his friends who were pushed are not coping nearly as well as he is with managing his own time.

Motivation has to come from within. People are astonished that the hands off approach worked for him.

Again, I don't agree that parents shouldn't set high expectations for their DC. Of course it needs to be done in a healthy way, but in my view, DC knowing that there is an expectation from their parents to work hard and achieve the best they can is not a bad thing.

Part of the purpose of GCSEs is about developing work ethic and self-discipline. Surely the fee months before these exams should be about working and revising hard to achieve the best results possible for the individual?

Yes but most children do that without all this £2 per hour malarkey!

Absolutely awful idea. How are you going to monitor the revision time? Stand over them, set them tasks?

They should be mature enough to realise that this school year is important for them without financial rewards

So glad that I didn’t have parents that encouraged competitiveness between me and my sibling. They recognised we were individuals with different strengths and celebrated that. And before you ask we both passed our exams well and have went on to have fulfilling careers.

How is it 'self-motivated' if you are paying them for it?

Do you have a time booking system so they can record the hours they work as they go along with an approval system so that they can be evaluated as to their quality?

I seriously doubt your twins are going to do any more work than they were intending to do anyway. Though they may now be spending revision time discussing ways to milk the system with their friends.

They have also agreed between themselves (with no encouragement from me) that the twin who gets the best results will pay the other £25.

Have the school given you revision plans? What they should be going over, practicing etc?
Presumably they get regular homework too - do they have to revise on the same night they have to write an English essay.
It's all very well saying "you have to do X hours of revision" but do they know what to revise, how to revise?
I remember asking my niece - who was constantly doing 'revision' "when do you actually learn something new?". I didn't understand it. Surely they still have stuff to learn? Shouldn't they be focusing on that?
What's the point in going over and over the same thing?

"They have also agreed between themselves (with no encouragement from me) that the twin who gets the best results will pay the other £25."

I think you are on the wind up.

Just stop, you had everyone fooled but you’ve gone too far now 🤣 it’s obvious this is made up now

Would your DC not know that you had expectations to work hard if you didn't pay them?

How are they developing work ethic and self discipline if they are only revising because you are paying them money?

The stealth boasting is strong with this one 🤣

I have a child who will get some 4s. Faced with a financial incentive to get a 5, they’d say, “nah, a pass is a pass, not worth it”.

Terrible idea 🤦🏻‍♀️ For many reasons, as others have already said. To give a different experience - When I did my GCSEs 15 years ago my parents deliberately didn't give me any cash reward or incentive (although a lot of my friends got money). They said they wanted to teach me about "intrinsic rewards", and I have to say I thank them for doing so. The reward was knowing I got grades that reflected the effort I put in. (Although we did have a takeaway on results day to celebrate it and I didn't feel like I missed out on the money). As a result I'd never bribe/reward my kids with money for academic performance.

This isn't how "intelligence" or learning works. Genes are a part of the picture, but certainly not all. It's not as neat as the nature/nurture divide, so I'd discourage this attitude that being twins puts them on an identical footing for academic attainment.

@mummabubs

Both have always been very similar achievers academically and have almost identical predicted grades.

🤣🤣🤣

They are now both making their revision timetables and there is even an element of competition in how much revision they're going to do.

We certainly won't be discouraging it.

This is fucked up beyond belief. I hope you're a troll because otherwise it's just depressing what some people think passes for parenting.

But you aren’t planning to encourage your children to develop an intrinsic sense of satisfaction or achievement from their own efforts which will set them up for life.

Instead, you are micromanaging by paying them per hour of revision and encouraging them to (unhealthily) compete against each other.

🤣 @ILoveeCakes you don’t understand genetics do you?

Even leaving aside @mummabubs reply to you about nature / nurture, and the fact that epigenetics would blow your mind… didn’t you clock the DS / DD combo? Even same sex twins aren’t always identical twins, but here’s a tip: they sure as hell aren’t identical when one’s a boy and one’s a girl.

I’m guessing your parents didn’t have to find £100 for a Grade 9 Science GCSE result for you? Or even a tenner for a 4, if you think boy/girl twins are identical 😉

@Nowfeeltheneedtopost

To be clear the competition comes from themselves and is not driven by us at all. They have always been competitive with regard to test results etc.

It is no bad thing in my view as it is totally self-driven.