To give a cash reward to the twin who gets the best GCSE results?

[Stackss]

DS and DD are both in year 11 so have their GCSEs coming up shortly. Both are bright and of very similar if not identical academic ability and are predicted very similar grades.

Both are relatively hard working (although with a tendency to coast) but DH and I would really like them to knuckle down and push themselves to get the best grades possible.

We therefore came up with the idea of an effort-based reward scheme allowing them to earn treats for completing revision- e.g. 75 hours= a meal out, 150 hours= a night away etc.

However, both twins have suggested that instead, the twin who gets the best results should receive the whole cash reward. They are both competitive with each other and have said this would give them greater incentive to work harder.

My concern is that the twin who doesn't do as well will be doubly disappointed on results day as they will also get no reward. Should I go with the twins' suggestion?

Oh dear. I am clearly a negligent parent then as I have no idea how much revision my son is doing.

Had his parents evening last night and he got 7 x 9s and 1 x8 and 1 x7 in his mocks.

Or is it that I trust and respect him as a young adult and that he is self motivated and conscientious amd let him simply be rather than monitor him.

@Needmorelego

Of course there needs to be balance but in the few months before GCSEs, the priority should be exam revision.

😂😂😂
Was going to post a serious reply but can see that would be a total waste of time.
This absolutely has to be a troll, right?

@Stackss in your opinion.
Everyone thinks differently though.
For the sake of the mental health of many teens I'm glad not everyone thinks like you.

In that case no rewards should be required

I agree with you @Needmorelego . The pressure on children and teens these days is absurd. Yes, education is hugely important, but here's the thing: education and exam results are not the same thing.

Everyone learns, processes and lives their lives differently. We should be moving more towards identifying and valuing different ways of demonstrating intelligence and skills in my opinion, rather than what seems to be a regressive obsession on exam results and endless testing, which evidently fosters this nasty competitiveness we can see in this thread where the grade number is prized above almost everything else. There is more to life.

If they’re so competitive &
motivated , have you got a plan in place to ensure they actually sleep?

Are you sure they won’t be awake til stupid o’clock and up hours before sun rises just so they can earn some cash?

@Holidayheaven2

Both are involved in sport and other activities, so there will be balances

But tbh if they spend extra time revising rather than on Netflix, that is no bad thing.

@Stackss That doesn’t answer my question. How do you know they will be getting enough sleep? It’s crucial, yes? I say this a a parent to a high-achieving child.

Base it on their grades but do it so each can "win" for instance give them an initial pot of £1000 each for their predicted grades, then add or take away a hundred for each level of grade above or below that.

Well it's been their own idea so I'm not just going to jump in and say no, but it still doesn't fit right with me. Even if I was going to be awarded 1 billion pound for getting an A+ in mathes theres still no way I'd have done it. I swear the numbers used to walk around the page.

If they have been working hard over the last couple of years they should already know most of the content a couple of months before the exam. Yes some revision is still important but making sure that they are relaxed, energized, healthy and therefore in right head space to take the exams is equally as important.

If they have had an intense day at school, several hours of revision afterwards is going to be too much. However, they might be able to do that after a less intense day. Similarly an hour of one sort of revision may be enough intensity wise whilst they could do 3 hours of another type.

It has to be. Noone could be this indifferent to the emotional health and long term well-being of their kids and boast about it online. Surely?

@LiquoriceAllsorts2

To be honest, although they have been working hard, they have coasted a bit and could do with working harder.

Part of it is that DH and I want them to experience getting their heads down and working hard for a few months, as they will need this skill when it comes to A levels and uni.

As long as your wants are met, that’s ok 👍👍👍👍👍👍

I have B G twins doing GCSEs. They get £££ for each subject they choose to take st as level. So max £400

Will you be rewarding them financially during A levels and university too? Will you be rewarding them financially when they do well at work?

Stupid idea, if they both work hard they both deserve a reward. They're saying that now but could you imagine doing worse than your twin AND not getting any incentive

Only child here, butwhen doing my exams I got a sliding scale. E.g
Top grade = 100
Next down 75
Then 50 etc

So nomatter how badly I did I still got something, so long as it wasn't a fail.

I think your Twins are brilliant OP.

We came up with the idea of an effort-based reward scheme allowing them to earn treats for completing revision... However, both twins have suggested that instead, the twin who gets the best results should receive the whole cash reward.

Faced with months of continuous nagging and bribery for performance, they've suggested a scheme dependent only on relative outcomes so they can do as much or as little revision as they like and get the reward in cash which they can then split between them! With brains like that and a little bit of application, they'll be fine with their GCSEs - especially if Economics is one of them.

How would you cope OP with a child that isn't academic? You seem to be obsessed with these poor kids passing at the highest grades then onto the next set of exams. What if they go to uni and hate it? It's not for everyone.

Learning is not all about being academic some of the most academic people I have met had little or no common sense and struggled in normal social situations.

We all want our children to achieve well in life be happy and successful at whatever job they do. I hope your children do well enough for you to be happy as it seems that this is what this is all about.

Probably by analysing the cameras that are set up in their rooms to ensure neither take their foot off the gas for even a second.

Enjoy the fall out late August when you have one (or two) children who feel they've failed their parents. They may never get that feeling that you are proud them back; relationship ruined

OP, you do realise that revision is about quality rather than quantity? They could be sitting at a desk for hours and hours, but nothing is going in.

I have a DS who got 10 9s at GCSE, 4 A stars at A-level and is now at Oxbridge. We definitely supported him academically, but if I had thought about it in your terms / if I had timed 'how many hours' revision he had done; or started some conversation about paying him £2 per hour or some sliding scale payment for grades, he would have thought I was an absolutely stupid mother, quite frankly.

You need to find more relevant ways to support them. Ask them if you can test them on a topic, for instance. Go for lots of walks with them - ask them to tell you what they have revised / consolidated in that day. Make sure they have breaks / fresh air / good food. Take them out for lunch, Starbucks - whatever. But fgs, TALK to them and get informed / involved in a way that is helpful and makes sense to them. Don't just chuck money at them snd make it all about this cash!

Money would have made no difference to any of my kids' exam results. You are in a hiding to nowhere with this. My DS knows the importance of working hard, but he has also learned how to "work smart" (in his words). What you are suggesting is is not very smart, sorry.

My parents gave me £50 for every grade A and above. Ended up with £400, which was a lot of money to a 16 year old in 2001!

I think you need to find another way OP, it could have the reverse effect if one twin decides there is no point in trying in future if the other twin 'wins'. You also want to avoid the situation where one is labelled the clever one as I am sure they each have their strengths even if they approach things differently.