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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell you the NHS is a frightening failure for children?

332 replies

redorbreak · 05/01/2023 20:19

I suppose when we read headlines it's A&E waiting times and often focused on adults

But I'm here to give a personal account of how dangerous it is for children, something we haven't shone the light on as much as adult care and waiting times being horrible right now.

DD was born very prematurely and she had some awful breathing this morning, which then worsened into sucking in a lot at the rib cage (not that unusual for her but it seemed worse than usual). She couldn't stay awake much

I knew an ambulance would take a long time and needed the car, so I was going to drive her myself. I went to put her into her car seat and she went floppy, like a rag doll. Limp and floppy. I screamed and luckily H was there who phoned an ambulance

I explained calmly but seriously on the phone what was going on. The phone operator said 5 hour wait. I said please, she's gone floppy. Please help us. She said sorry, but 5 hour wait times. Can I take her myself?

I explained I could take her myself but I wouldn't be able to see if she was okay or not? I'd be driving. She said that was safer than waiting for an ambulance

I put the phone down and took her in, frightened, petrified for her life. I got there after 25 minutes and rushed to her. She was still not responding. She was triaged straight away. Her Sats were sitting at 69/70.

She is currently in PICU (intensive care) and I don't know when she will wake up. Nobody seems to be straight with me. I'm not getting a clear picture here. My H is on his way up now and hopefully they will tell me straight what this means for her now

The NHS is fucked.

OP posts:
Original poster
redorbreak · 05/01/2023 20:21

She's 9 months old. H couldn't come as our son was on the way back from school and he couldn't get hold of the school bus. So nobody would be there when he came home. Our families live miles away

It's just horrific.

OP posts:
ProcrastinatingUntilNextYear · 05/01/2023 20:21

I am so sorry to read everything you have been through. I hope your baby will be ok.
That makes for a frightening read and must have been awful for you. I assumed when children were involved response time would be reduced. We are in very scary times.

Original poster
redorbreak · 05/01/2023 20:23

ProcrastinatingUntilNextYear · 05/01/2023 20:21

I am so sorry to read everything you have been through. I hope your baby will be ok.
That makes for a frightening read and must have been awful for you. I assumed when children were involved response time would be reduced. We are in very scary times.

It is not the case. Children don't get priority unless there's a clinical need, but the ambulance said this was a Cat 1 call but still nothing

OP posts:
BeckyBoo16 · 05/01/2023 20:24

How terrifying for you, I’m so sorry you are experiencing this. I am shocked by them still saying it’s a 5 hour wait time especially for a child and even more so a child under 1! I hope your little one will be okay and that your hubbie is with you now. Please feel free to DM me if you want someone to talk too?

Sending big hugs x

MyFuckRationsAreDepleated · 05/01/2023 20:25

I’m so sorry. There are no words to say his horrendous this is. I hope your daughter is ok x

shortandpaleandoldandugly · 05/01/2023 20:26

I am sorry to read this but sadly not surprised. It's a total mess.

watcherintherye · 05/01/2023 20:26

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, op. It’s a cliche, but you are in the best place. Fucked as it is, the NHS often comes into its own with emergency care, once you get access to it. Hoping you get a reassuring update about your baby very soon.

iloveyankeecandle · 05/01/2023 20:26

I am so so sorry. This is one of my biggest fears. You were so brave taking her by yourself. I hope she's on the mend soon

Original poster
redorbreak · 05/01/2023 20:28

Thank you x

I'm 100% sure I broke the speed limit at one point on the motorway, but it was thankfully clear

I just felt like I wasn't living in the safety of the UK at all. It was a weird feeling, like the safety and calm of a civilised and reasonably organised country had gone

It was just so scary.

OP posts:
littleducks · 05/01/2023 20:29

Sounds crazy frightening for you. If they didn't have ambulances available best to tell you take her yourself and sounds like treatment was needed asap if she was taken to picu. Children can deteriorate very fast and also can bounce back from very ill so i hope she gets a diagnosis treatment and makes a swift recovery.

MissyB1 · 05/01/2023 20:29

Sadly I’m not shocked, there simply aren’t ambulances available even for the most serious of emergencies. They are queuing outside A&Es trying to handover patients. It’s horrendous and very very scary.

Sending very best wishes for a good recovery for your baby. I can only imagine how distressed you must be.

georgarina · 05/01/2023 20:30

OP your story terrifies me because I am single and pregnant with a severely growth restricted baby who is likely to be premature as well. I don't have a car. If something happens......I'll have to rely on Uber.

I really hope your DD will be ok 💕

Original poster
redorbreak · 05/01/2023 20:30

MissyB1 · 05/01/2023 20:29

Sadly I’m not shocked, there simply aren’t ambulances available even for the most serious of emergencies. They are queuing outside A&Es trying to handover patients. It’s horrendous and very very scary.

Sending very best wishes for a good recovery for your baby. I can only imagine how distressed you must be.

Thank you

I'm a very shy person but I don't know what happened, when I arrived at Children's A&E I screamed 'SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP!' And my cries were answers

A lot of tuts from a few mums sitting with their DC waiting though

OP posts:
Original poster
redorbreak · 05/01/2023 20:32

georgarina · 05/01/2023 20:30

OP your story terrifies me because I am single and pregnant with a severely growth restricted baby who is likely to be premature as well. I don't have a car. If something happens......I'll have to rely on Uber.

I really hope your DD will be ok 💕

All the very best Flowers

My little one was born at 22+6. She has no issues other than doesn't cope well with a cold (she's in hospital now because of RSV, a cause of the common cold)

OP posts:
MilkyYay · 05/01/2023 20:33

Just wanted to say ive been in your shoes, prem iugr baby in picu on a vent. It was a two week battle but she pulled through.

It will seem really awful and it sounds like you got the worst end of things with the ambulance but the PICU doctors, nurses and physios honestly are amazing.

Crossing everything for your little one. Bronchiolitis is crap.

thepatronsaintofbubblewrap · 05/01/2023 20:33

Fucking hell that's terrible service.

Sqqueeeeeeee · 05/01/2023 20:33

I’m so sorry OP, YANBU.

Which hospital are you in? They are not all the same. If you tell us where you are then maybe someone has some advice or insider info?

I almost lost my baby because I went to a bad hospital. They told me in A&E that my pregnancy wasn’t viable, that I should have an abortion and that it’d at least six hours to see a doctor. I went to a different hospital, didn’t even have to go to A&E because they took me straight to the maternity ward, saw a doctor within 15 minutes and my baby is a foot away from me now and perfectly fine. I have horror stories about the first hospital and nothing but amazing stories about the other - the lack of ambulances is caused by the inability to get patients into the hospital so there’s a direct correlation there.

It’s the same with GP surgeries - the one before I moved was awful, no appointments at all. They wouldn’t do DC’s vaccinations so I had to pay privately, wouldn’t do a smear on me, wouldn’t do anything at all. They also mixed up my records somehow and had it listed that I’d had surgery I hadn’t had, diagnosed me a bunch of mental health issues that weren’t about me and had a note that I’d ended up in hospital after a suicide attempt (none of it was me but they refused to accept it). My new GP surgery are amazing and I honestly couldn’t fault them if I tried.

All the best.

LaurieFairyCake · 05/01/2023 20:33

Please please make an appointment to see your MP

I'm so sorry for what happened Flowers

Complain to PALS too. Raise it with everyone.

mrssunshinexxx · 05/01/2023 20:33

@redorbreak honestly fuck the other mums tutting if their babies were unresponsive and floppy they wouldn't of just been sat there waiting ! You did the right thing it sounds terrifying

MilkyYay · 05/01/2023 20:34

Georgarina please sign up for the RSV vaccine trials. Google them, they are in most areas and for an IUGR prem baby you seriously want that vaccine.

Original poster
redorbreak · 05/01/2023 20:35

@Sqqueeeeeeee so sorry x how many weeks was your baby born at?

OP posts:
AFineBalance · 05/01/2023 20:35

Sorry this happened to your family. It is truly in a terrible state

PeppermintChoc · 05/01/2023 20:35

OP I’m so sorry. It’s so bloody frightening. You didn’t need a lift to the hospital you needed trained first responders to take over your daughters care and administer any first aid they could. How absolutely awful that you’ve had to drive.

Its just an awful state of affairs and I am terrified that my children might need an ambulance one day and one won’t be available.

Our NHS is nothing to be proud of anymore. It needs serious reform urgently, like yesterday!

I hope your little girl is ok.

Dominoeffecter · 05/01/2023 20:36

God you poor things, I hope baby is ok

GentlyBen · 05/01/2023 20:37

mrssunshinexxx · 05/01/2023 20:33

@redorbreak honestly fuck the other mums tutting if their babies were unresponsive and floppy they wouldn't of just been sat there waiting ! You did the right thing it sounds terrifying

It is possible they were tutting at the situation, as sort of “oh, how awful” tut.

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