Am I being too much???

[thegreatesty]

I have a 6 month old DC.
DP and I haven't been out together without baby.
We have decided to go out and MIL will have baby for the first time.
I'm already anxious being away from the baby.

MIL has now messaged to say she's invited family round to meet the baby on that day.
I feel uneasy about it. It will be the first time away from the baby.
And DC hasn't met the other family members before.

Am I being a pain in the arse saying I'm not happy for this to happen?

That's a worry, not anxiety. I can imagine living "at that level", it would be lovely in comparison to my fairly severe GAD.

I just can't imagine 'spending time with family = cold sore'.

Your MIL had successful raised children, abc has coped with a crying baby.

i don’t know how people exist being so precious

YABU.

If it makes you feel uneasy then I would postpone leaving her for a while longer.

They're not smoking and drinking and it's not a party.
Your baby is more likely to get upset if you're in the room and not holding him / her. If you're not around and not in site, chances are your baby will be fine and well entertained by family members.

If it was a party or something that's different. But just some close family coming over to goo over your baby? YABU.

Plus, not many people are really that fussed about your baby. Especially if they haven't met them and the baby is 6 months old already.

Really OP, it's up to you. Plenty people will tell you that you should be happy with your baby being passed round and it's family, so you should be comfortable with whatever MIL decides to do.
You don't have to be, there's nothing wrong with it, this is your baby, and your decision.

Are you normally this irrationally anxious and hysterical?

I understand. You want the first time to be calm for your baby. But she really will be fine. If she cries, your Mil will soothe her. No harm will come to her. It will just affect your enjoyment which is a shame for you but baby will be fine and won’t remember it.

You could of course ask your mil to not do this on the first occasion. Would she underestand? I would if it was my Dd or DIL.

YABU and massively overthinking.

Sounds like you really need this time out with DP. Enjoy yourself. Find your perspective.

Let the GPS enjoy their time with baby and showing baby off. Your PFB will be fine.

No baby ever died from being a bit 'upset'. Relax.

First time away, MIL should try to keep it low key for baby. Your child is not a doll for her to play with and show off.

Could you ask her to come to your house instead and just go out for lunch or something for 1 hour.

tell her you are not ready to go out for longer and SUIT YOURSELF

do not be bullied into doing things at a faster pace than you are ready.
it’s good to get out but take it one step at a time. If this does not feel
right the it is not right, so cancel it.

Your baby is 6 months, not a newborn. Your MIL has presumably managed to successful raised at least one child to adulthood. Lots of babies that age are at childminders or nurseries. Baby will be fine and if she’s not keen on being handed round I’m sure your mother in law is sensibly enough to take over.

Oh for gods sake when did people become so precious?

Left baby at 3 months with hardly known GPS
No doubt she was passed around ...

Now 27 a Durham graduate with a fab job earning more than me in 3 years

Get OVER YOURSELVES

So your baby maybe gets handed to someone, cries - and then what? She’ll most likely be handed back to MIL. You need to get a sense of perspective. She is going to have much bigger upsets than that in her life and she may even enjoy seeing people other than you and your husband!

You are being daft.

This

In our family babies love being with grandparents, aunts and uncles from a young age. They don’t even cry for their parents, as
long as they they are fed, dry, napped and getting plenty of attention.

The kids also grow up to be confident.

This. I can't believe how pfb sone mothers on here are, ky hasn't even happened and baby might be delighted to have other people smiling and cooing at them, they're sociable creatures if mothers stop being so uptight.

The thing is, this is quite a good sociable age, before separation anxiety kicks in during the toddler years. Isolating babies from their families is unlikely to do them a lot of good really, and helping them feel safe, confident, and happy around other people is sort of part of the parenting job.

If anything, it's better for more people to be popping in and out to share the load and lighten the burden on MIL and FIL.

I don't think you're being a pain in the arse and even if you are, so what? It's your baby. Your MIL should be a little more sensitive and considerate and ask you before inviting anyone, especially given it's your first time being away from your baby and with your baby being so young.

I would feel exactly the same in your situation.

Yes you're being too much!

I think YANBU. First time leaving baby with MIL and FIL and they want to invite lots of people over to see/hold baby.
No, I wouldn't like that either. Also, doesn't matter if you're reasonable or not. It's your baby and it's your decision ❤