Do high energy children ever calm down?

[GuinnessLover]

My son is 4. He has a huge amount of energy and people often comment on this (and I mean very often, to the point that I get sick of hearing it). From the moment he wakes up he is what I can only describe as nuts! He doesn't stop, at all. Just constant movement, climbing, jumping, etc etc. It's like he's been given a shit load of stimulants and has duracell batteries powering him. His key worker adores him but has also commented that in her 20 years in childcare she has never met a child who has anywhere near his energy levels. He is lovely, normal amount of tantrums, very kind, has a very good diet/routine and sleeps exceptionally well. I just struggle so much in the day and am reaching the point of exhaustion. Its just me and him most of the time and I can't keep up. AIB unrealistic I'm hoping he will eventually calm down a bit? I was close to tears today because he's just drained me of a energy. Anyone have similar and lived to tell the tale?

My daughter was like this and tbh still is quite like this at 12. She won't watch a full movie for example, hates reading, never sits still. I'm used to it kind of now and it gets easier as they become more independent.

Any junior parkruns nearby?
Our lives are full of various sports.

I have a Duracel child. At least he's developed some sense of self preservation with age... As a 2yo, he needed retrieving from trees and gently coxing down from the top of the soft play playframe... he climbed up the outside of the net designed to keep the children in...
(Never let a child watch Ninja Warrior before going to soft play) Oh and he literally took his first steps in order to hurl himself gleefully into a swimming pool.

The glitch with the burn it off with activity approach is that they just get fitter/ faster/ stronger 😁

ADHD crosses my mind as his sibling is ND in several ways, and we've already identified dyslexia. I'm not convinced I've got compelling enough evidence to take to the GP yet. I also suspect that I may have ADHD. I need a lot of exercise to be able to sleep and am never still (amongst a multitude of other traits) but at least I was fit and agile enough to catch DS 😂

Mine have adhd but chilled out and slowed in teen years. Before that massive amounts of sport. Literally sport activity every day plus weekends

My DS used to get up between 4.30 to 5.30 for years and never sat still. He's now 14 and sits still for xbox and you tube and sleeps better just. Won't watch TV or films and has ants in pants but is wonderful. I feel your pain, its exhausting!

This sounds like my ds5 and he’s now after 3 years of almost monthly visits to camhs been diagnosed as adhd and has medication for during the day which has been life changing for our household and for him educationally socially etc but he also gets night medication of melatonin as he wouldn’t even sleep, if you have concerns it’s worth exploring

Oh OP, I hear you.

Mine was like that, learnt to walk at 11months, then came the climbing, then came the jumping.

Sleep pattern still to this day and he's 8 is 11pm - 5:30am. 6:30 if I'm lucky, but he wakes like zebbidy full of energy and ready to go for the day.

It's like trying to parent Spiderman on amphetamine on 6hours sleep a night.

He was eventually diagnosed with ADHD, but we don't medicate. We are just going to see if he begins to calm down a bit as a teen, which I am hoping, if not with his consent and discussion we can look at medicating.

Also school wise, if engaged and interested he will concentrate, he will also occasionally build Lego sets for 20/30minutes before getting bored and finding something else to do. Watching films or TV is not possible he gets distracted too easily.

Behaviour wise, he's ok, he can have the odd meltdown and his emotions are a bit mood swingy and overwhelming sometimes, but we cope. He's polite and well mannered and plays well with peers.

So I'm not overly concerned, but I'm that mum running around the park like Usain bolt whilst shouting "get down from there" whilst clutching caffeine.

I'm also a widow and a loan parent, so yeah it's a bit full on. But we manage.

I sympathise. My 4 yr old DS is the same. I've actually never met a child with more energy. Long walks help. He's very focused when it comes to activities that engage his brain but is going through a super hero phase so is have constantly jumping around like Spider-Man. Someone suggested martial arts as a way to build focus and we've just started a club which I genuinely hope will help. Football hasn't really helped.

DS is still like this. Hes 8.
My niece used to be like this. Shes 11 now and has her own phone with unlimited access. Shes calm now although glued to the screen 24/7.

I literally feel like I could have written this EXACT post. I will await the advice! 😆 🤣

I'm such a numpty- lots of advice already given!
I shall READ the advice 😆

My youngest was like this. Constantly told at primary school he probably had ADHD, nothing ever came of it. He literally couldn't sit still. Very happy, loud, extrovert personality. The good news is that he has massively calmed down since puberty. Now 12 and occasionally has hyper moments but has no trouble concentrating or doing school work and has lots of friends. Still an extrovert but he really did learn to self regulate from around 11.

Well no, it doesn’t work like that and your uncle GP should know better than to joke about it. ADHD really affects kids and their parents, their schooling, friendships etc and you either meet the criteria or you don’t.

My son was very full on as a child, like a whirlwind. He needed a lot of structure to his day. He calmed down a lot by 8 and by secondary school he was a quiet, studious child. His teen years were ridiculously easy and completely unrecognisable to the younger child he was. He’s an adult now and one of the most sensible, calm people you’ll ever meet.

Not until secondary school in my experience I'm afraid.

Climbing frame in the garden? Trampoline with net?

Mouse wheel for generating electricity 🙂

7yo still like this especially on day trips. At school apparently he is fine within a class setting.

We are convinced possibly ADHD. Hopefully he will grow out of it. We still live in hope 🤞

He couldn't focus at martial arts class his older siblings attend. That didn't work. Tried for several weeks.

re physical activity as an anecdote.

i was a talented gymnast and runner as a child. As a result I was selected for squads and by age 9 is was athletics club 3 times a week, gymnastics 4/5 times, plus a lot of school sport.

my brother didn’t quite have the same talent. Did swimming and football but only in the recreational squad, so training a couple of times a week.

my parents were convinced he had adhd. Dr’s trips, cutting out e numbers from diet etc. I was labelled “lazy” as I only wanted to sit and read compared to my always on the go brother.

in hindsight I think wtf were they on? A kid training 3 hours a day, plus more at weekends, is not going to be a bundle of energy at home. The one doing 3 hours a week probably still has a ton of energy to burn off.

my brother is definitely not adhd btw. Sleeps more than anyone else I know. Still one of those people who likes to be getting on with stuff.

Interestingly, several of the Lionesses (as in the England female football team) have said their parents put them into sport because they had so much energy as children. Beth Mead says her dad used to kick a ball with her in the hallway before bed to try to wear her out. Ella Toone played every sport she could and says even now as an adult she can't sit still long enough to watch a film.

I agree the calm down coincided with secondary school/puberty ime so you prob do need to find some activities and strategies to help as you have a way to go yet. Sports, swimming and theatre school all really helped my DS - but not until a bit older, 6/7/8. Trampoline in the garden is a must!

My brother was like this and my nephew is the same. Honestly the only thing that calmed by brother down was smoking significant amounts of weed as a teenager (I am not suggesting this as an option by the way!). But he was a bad combo of high energy levels plus high risk taking. I genuinely think without the weed he would have ended up in prison or dead before 18 (think rollerskating off roofs, climbing on the 2 story school roof).

The main thing you can do is channel the energy into something positive (sport/exercise), so he learns positive coping strategies as he get older. My mum tells of taking us swimming with friends, everyone else's kids would be knackered after and my bro would still need a park trip and a bike ride when they had been dropped home! I am not as bad as my brother or nephew, but I need exercise and outdoor time in order to be happy, so I've worked this into my life (I've got a horse). My brother cycles 20 mile round trip commute 6 days on top of a moderately physical job.

If it can be channeled its a huge asset, you can get so much done/have such amazing holidays as a high energy person. Good luck!

For some kids a ‘sensory diet’ can help give them all the stimulation they need. If he craving movement he might have sensory differences. Both of mine got a lot better with age.

I was so hyper-active that I was put on barbiturates for about 7 years. I eventually calmed down and by the time I was 15 one of my teachers actually put in my report that I was "lethargic" but then his classes were mind numbingly boring. I think I was pretty normal from late teens, so there is hope.

My DD was like that. Plays every sport known to child. Diagnosed ADHD at 12 as also has the inattention. Only really picked up once went to high school. It's not an easy thing to live with. It's really tough. It plays havoc with friendships, school work etc.

I know this thread is a bit old, but I found it while searching ‘high energy toddler’ 😅

DS is 2.5 and a real handful. I have known for a while he needs to be run like a dog, but the other day I found an article about vestibular and propeioceptive sensory seeking and have started to implement things like offering an opportunity to push or jump when he’s being a bit challenging. He does swimming and rugby as well.

Does anyone else have any other tips? Apart from upping my own fitness levels to keep up!!

Dd is now 13 and still like this. The other day she watched a movie and sat still for 1h20m and I was so shocked! Normally she is hanging off the couch, doing cartwheels, fidgeting etc. She does have dyslexia but otherwise is fine- doing well at school etc.