Rude nasty foul mouthed comments aimed directly at MN posters? AIBU to get angry?

[Bleachmycloths]

I guess this has been covered in the past but nasty comments on MN are cowardly and spiteful. Often , the same idea or message or idea can be conveyed without knee jerk responses which directly ask posters are they stupid/ a moron/vile with a sprinkling of ‘fucks’.
I am not referring to replies which refer to a poster’s problem. For example, if a OP has a horrible FIL who is giving her grief, then, by all means, have a go at him to show support for the OP.
To reply directly to a OP with ‘Are you fucking stupid, or what?’ - or something equally offensive- is inexcusable.
It is the cowardice which angers me. Posters will make awful uncalled for comments which they would never make face to face. Like giving another driver the V sign because you can just drive off.
Is it best to simply ignore and move on? Because, actually there are a lot of helpful posters who give good, useful, sympathetic advice.

I haven’t been on mumsnet long and I wasn’t aware I was starting ‘yet another thread’

Perhaps consider searching before posting on a topic? Maybe figure out the general tone of a forum before telling people on it they are internetting wrong?

your reply kind of proves my point

Some people on here are abusive and get deleted but PP is just robustly disagreeing with you. Complaining like it's a personal attack rather undermines your point.

I am not whining

Surely that is for the people reading your whining to decide :-)

Thanks. I’ve not been on the receiving end of attacks. As a newbie I’m starting to laugh at myself now. And God save us from Facebook! I don’t do social media. It’s mega boring 😆

If you want sweetness and light go to net mums (if that is still going)

Still got the same 9 people telling each other they are lovely hun. For some reason MN is wildly more popular despite the fact we all seem to hate everything about it.

If you stick around, you'll recognise certain shitty posters though. Even after they name change.

And of course you get trolls. And keyboard warriors.

Just ignore the obviously nasty posts, or report them if they breach guidelines.

There are a hell of a lot more kind, thoughtful and intelligent posters here than dickheads.

Sweetness and light is so not my thing. Honestly.

You “rest your case” because you received a direct reply to your post about nastiness? There was no nastiness in my reply so your case cannot be rested 😊

But I will add…

• I said it was another whiny post. Because it is. I didn’t say you were whining, there is a difference

• Oh that’s excellent

• There is one every day, sometimes multiple a day. I fail to see how you have missed them all but a quick search would have helped you if that really was the case

• The implication was that you didn’t like the content

• The implication was that you were hurt

• I didn’t make any assumptions about your resilience. I was talking in the general you, and there was an if there. No need to be offended on anyone else’s behalf though.

• Excellent

• No, it doesn’t. There was no nastiness in my reply. It was simply direct and to the point

• Because this is AIBU. That’s the whole point. You can’t expect to post and receive only replies that agree with you

I don’t do social media. It’s mega boring

And yet here you are on Mumsnet which is also social media.

Thanks. That’s the impression I’m getting now.

Yes this 👆
I'm usually a lurker, I recently set up a new account (I worry about internet safety) with the view to both contribute and gain advice. I do feel surprised at the number of snark attacks. I just ignore it and try not to be a wanker, pretty much as in RL. I have been on MN, reading, for more than 10 years and it does seem to have become more hostile, which is a shame. Still I remain here for the people who give good advice and are helpful. It's a big support for me, since RL is very stressful and the support is lacking.

You can report things as not in the spirit of the site - by parents for parents

Oh no, I have no kids! Am I "in the spirit of the site"?

Oh, shit. I thought social media was only sites like FB TikTok instagram etc. touché 😊

Beat me to it 😉

Oh no, I have no kids! Am I "in the spirit of the site"?

Do you have a MiL you hate? That helps.

If not, perhaps you could persuade someone to park on your drive then document the elaborate way you extract revenge?

The poster you quoted has not done any of the things you mentioned in your first post.

I'd argue that irl many people are thinking "are you being stupid?" but make soothing sounds to move the conversation on because they aren't the one directly affected by the behaviour.

There is often an air of aggression and rudeness, and lots of thinly veiled personal attacks.

Mirroring real life maybe, people are becoming a lot more rude.

Ok. I get your points

They would never be brave enough to speak to someone like that in real life, so they do it where they know they can hide. I just feel genuinely sorry for people who speak to others like shite, they must be quite sad and inadequate in their personal lives.

I dont swear and generally we dont use swear words in our home. I find it really uncouth and gross and get thenick when there are very swear replies. As a Christian, I get a nails-down-a-blackboard feeling when I see 'Jesus', 'Christ' or 'Jesus Christ' used as a swear word. It's pretty horrible to see.

I do like MN though and love free speech even more. People have the right to use language 8 disagree with, even if I find it offensive and blasphemous. People also have the right to use general profanities and I wouldn't challenge it unless it was said in a directly insulting way.

When I hear or read someone swearing, the same part of my brain that lights up when someone does a humdinger of a fart gets activated. Just like when I get a whiff of someone's putrid bum-puff, I pretend it didn't happen and duly gloss over it.

One person's difference of opinion is another person's rude or nasty. I remember one thread where someone posted that they agreed with the teacher involved rather than the OP and her response was how rude! It wasn't rude at all.

You've just posted I get your points which shows a greater emotional maturity than many many posters on here.

I honestly don’t think that post did prove your point at all. It wasn’t foul mouthed, and I don’t think it was particularly rude. And I am a sensitive flower who has just spent a whole afternoon hiding in my room because I sent a text to someone which I am currently completely overthinking and worried will offend them.

I do regret sending that reply. I know it wasn’t foul mouthed etc. I can’t post something and then only be happy with the replies I like. But thank you.

YANBU OP but there’s plenty of these people in real life too unfortunately. Went to a party yesterday where someone said hello to a friend and the response was “fuck off”. The same person who was rude (he sees it as being funny/affectionate to a mate) punched me loosely in stomach and said “alright fatty”. When I did roll my eyes at this and said “unnecessary” he said “I wouldn’t say it if it was true would I? Fucking chill out”.

People think they’re being SO hilarious- it’s really not. And no this isn’t a friend, it’s someone who sometimes associates with the same people as my family. Unfortunately.

as this thread is showing. MN is full of cunty bitter women.

I once felt suicidal and reached out on here for help and I was met with a reply that ignored my plea for help but corrected my grammar and spelling instead. Vile people on here

Omg that’s awful! With someone like that I’d love to flick my head back and nut him giving him a bloody broken nose 😆. Like they do in films lol.