Struggling to conceive please please help

[infertilemertyl]

Hello,

I'm really struggling to conceive. I've had a laparoscopy and hysteroscopy to remove adhesions. The surgery went successfully however I do have one completely blocked tube. Other than that my doctor says I'm good to continue ttc.

My biggest concern however is that I have spotting before my period which lasts 5-7 days. Sometimes it's quite significant - others it's barely anything. My doctor was not concerned about this at all.....

I'm really concerned and fed up of my body not working properly.

I'm wondering if this is likely to be low progesterone?

If so, is this easy to sort out? Can it be done naturally?

I should add - I suffer greatly with stress :( my life is quite stressful and I don't know how much of this could be from that too? I started having spotting 5-7 days before my period a few years after I was in a bad car accident which made me think it was stress related.

Can anyone advise please? I feel like giving up

Go private OP, plenty of clinics offer 0% interest finance schemes if you cannot afford to pay upfront

Does test for progesterone just mean asking for a blood test to test hormones?

I was on the NHS waiting list at the same time as going private. When I fell pregnant through private treatment, I then gave up my NHS slot.

You don't say if your partner has been given the all clear? Our issue was male related.

@CleoandRalf

Apologies, I'll stop 'moaning' and 'just go privately for ivf' when this wasn't even my question. My question was about progesterone and spotting.

Ivf has not been recommended to me at the moment. I am answering replies from others on here who are offering helpful advice - some are mentioning ivf in the future. At current I have been told not to consider ivf until a year post surgery. I do not have the finances to simply go straight to private ivf and ignore my doctors advice.

Please read posts properly before telling somebody to 'stop moaning'. It is incredibly insensitive and unhelpful. I do not need to be told to 'stop moaning'.

The NHS usually doesn’t mention IVF as early as they should, for obvious reasons.

Hence why many have success going directly and privately, you’ll get the tests you need to make the right decision for you. Not the cheapest decision for the NHS.

@Wifflywafflywoo

Thank you so much - your reply has really made me smile 😊 I am definitely going to take your advice - I know I need to make a lot of adjustments to my diet eg. Drinking water instead of caffeine 😳😳

I just hope I can reverse any potential damage I've done to my body already - eg. If my progesterone levels are low due to my diet and stress levels - I hope I can adjust this naturally through changes.

Thank you so much ♥️♥️

Just to be clear OP, and I'm sorry if I've misunderstood, is it the case that you have not had your day 3 and day 21 bloods done (i.e., LH, FSH, oestrogen, progesterone at the appropriate times)? I know that the 'day 21' is a bit of a misnomer because it just needs to be 7 days post ov rather than day 21, but I think that it's often referred to in these terms.

If so your GP should be willing to do these with out any issues if you have been TTC for so long. It would also be good to check things like thyroid function, haemoglobin etc. at the same time. Sorry if you've already had this done and I have missed reading it.

@infertilemertyl I had a child a few years ago then when we started TTC again in 2020 all of a sudden I had spotting before my period, which sounds exactly like you are describing. I was equally fobbed off by my GP so I did a private progesterone check (as well as a few others) which came back clear. I eventually had a hycosy (HSG) and then immediately fell pregnant, so maybe it was a tubes problem for me, but I always felt that the spotting wasn't right and indicated some sort of problem, so I totally get the anxiety around it. I used to keep a log of it every month to keep an eye on it, not sure why. From my research it did seem like all it could indicate was a progesterone issue so if your progesterone is fine then it shouldn't matter but I didn't really believe that. Anyway just wanted to add that, if it at all helps. Good luck.

@CleoandRalf

I understand that but unfortunately I don't have the finances to just go for private ivf. I will of course consider everything possible but to qualify to ivf I will require a further surgery to remove my blocked tube - my doctor has already informed me of this.
That will entail another substantial wait for surgery so I won't be able to just go private or nhs for ivf immediately regardless.

If I don't need ivf then I don't want to put my body through it - I have other health conditions (my heart) that have to be considered too. My doctor has said I'm not in a position to consider (or even qualify) for ivf at the moment as I need to wait another year prior to this surgery - private I understand will be different.

I am not moaning - I'm looking for any possible explanations to my spotting before my periods to be able to resolve this and hopefully conceive naturally. Unfortunately my gyno has not been helpful with this as he has said it's fine. I find mumsnet to be very helpful when I discover other real life women who have suffered with the same issues, who have real advice based on their experience.

I will 100% consider private ivf - but it's just not as simple as just going for it next week.

@kmbegs

Thank you!
I'm glad somebody else has experienced it so knows how worrying it seems!! I had an hsg in November as part of my surgery which did show the completely blocked tube but my other tube is open and healthy. I had an ovarian cyst too and my ovaries were stuck to my uterus. I am hoping that my cycles will go back to normal on their own - I'm unsure if I need to recover internally a bit longer after the surgery or not. I just hope the problem was what was happening inside me prior to the surgery and that it will eventually calm down. Hope that all makes sense😬

I haven't had a progesterone test - so it could be that still.

Thank you so much - definitely helpful! X

You’d not qualify for NHS IVF, not private IVF.

the fact you haven’t even looked into this is a bit odd, especially if it’s important to you.

@SchnitzelVonCrummsTum

I haven't had any of those tests - never been even had them mentioned to me by any gps!
I'm definitely going to push for these in the new year. I've always been told my spotting is normal (3 different doctors) but I'm worrying that the spotting is preventing implantation from happening seeing as I only have one week with no bleeding after ovulation, then the week before my period I have the spotting, then the period. It's so confusing :(

@CleoandRalf

The fact that I haven't looked into what is odd?

IVF.

You’re taking the requirements and limitation’s on NHS IVF and applying them to private treatment. It’s not the same.

You absolutely can proceed with IVF with one blocked tube, it’s NHS IVF you’d not qualify for without surgery.

So again, the fact you’ve done no research into this is a bit odd if it’s such a big deal for you

I'd advise reading the book taking Charge of Your Fertility

I think you should go back to the GP with some specific ‘wants’:

1. Day 21 progesterone
2. AMH blood test - most accurate way to estimate your egg reserve
3. Semen analysis for your partner - no point assuming that you don’t both have problems
4. Information whether you will qualify for NHS IVF and if there is a waiting list. You have a diagnosis of tubal damage and have been trying for over 2 years, so in most areas you would qualify immediately. Obviously keep trying naturally but I would start to get this ball rolling - waiting a year gives you only 6 attempts at conception. Not forgetting that you won’t know which months you are ovulating on the unblocked side.

Finding ways to de-stress & have a healthier lifestyle are always going to be good for you, but making these changes isn’t going to magically unblock your tubes.

Also, if you do manage to get a positive pregnancy test, get an early (6-7wk) scan. You may need to do this privately, but having damaged tubes puts you at increased risk of an ectopic pregnancy.

Good luck, infertility can be a long, lonely road.

@CleoandRalf

I'm not engaging with you any further after this as this is just tedious.

I'm 'moaning' and now you are questioning my credibility by suggesting this isn't important to me. Why the hell would I be wasting my time asking a question on here if it wasn't important to me?

I have explained my situation in so many replies on here and you're taking from this that I've done no research on Ivf. I AM NOT ASKING ABOUT IVF. I am asking about progesterone and spotting.

Could you see another GP at your surgery? I'm NE and DD1 was IVF - we had to have down that we had been ttc for 4 years before the clinic would look at us - my GP was fantastic and after 2 pushed our referral through, it may be worth seeing if you could see another?

I also had acupuncture while waiting to test - bit of an old wives tale but DD1 is 3 and a half now so I recommend it!

You then added you’re not eligible for IVF anyway due to the tube blockage, which I’m merely saying isn’t true for private clinics.

Sorry you’re finding the truth so hard to take in

I had spotting for a good few days before my period before I conceived my son and a short (10 day) luteal phase. I conceived him on my first month of trying. In my experience it’s not necessarily a problem.

i did struggle to conceive my second though. We saw a doctor privately, took lots of supplements etc. I don’t know if it helped but it let me feel more in control. I took progesterone for my first trimester too which again let me feel like I was doing something.

@Shelby2010

Thank you very much, I will definitely go back to the gp in the new year and request the tests.

My gyno was very confident I would have only a slightly lower chance of natural conception than someone with two working tubes so I am really trying to think positively.

I hope the progesterone test can give me answers and hopefully comfort that my progesterone levels are ok - in my gut I think stress has had a huge influence on my cycle but that's obviously only my instinct.

Thank you so much for your help xx

I was TTC for 2 years. Obsessively in all honesty. We had two losses along the way which made it worse. I had all kinds of appointments (my partner too) we were told that we were both fertile and it would just happen when it would. We were told that a year today. We stopped trying as we had our wedding coming up. Both got COVID pretty bad in February and then in march tested positive. Dates dont add up at all. They told me I ovulated extremely early that month. Our son is now two weeks. I wish I had listened to people sooner about trying to relax. It's weird how things go! I hope you have a positive test soon. 💗

I had what sounds like similar spotting before periods last year. After it happened a few times and I was cracking up because it wasn’t very long since I’d had a miscarriage, I did have blood tests and they came back fine. It may be completely unrelated but I started taking a pre-conception multivitamin and that was the cycle I did conceive in.

Lots of love - it’s such a dark place ttc and feeling like it’ll never happen xx

@CleoandRalf

To which I agreed with you!!!!! I said obviously this is different for private clinics!!!!

Just to add I also had spotting like you describe. Forgot to add that in my post!