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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think AIBU is just a viper pit

81 replies

BigMama32 · 27/12/2022 16:56

I’ve read through loads of different threads today and there’s everything from the sarcastic to just downright cyber bullying on AIBU
its batshit!

OP posts:

ilovesooty · 27/12/2022 20:20

Stellaris22 · 27/12/2022 20:14

Any forum where people can regularly change their user name is going to be unpleasant.

If you weren't ashamed of your views you wouldn't go to lengths to anonymize yourself.

There are loads of posters who name change just to post inflammatory shite, agreed. They just don't want it connected to their regular username.

NinjaWarriorCooker · 27/12/2022 20:23

BigMama32 · 27/12/2022 20:19

Ninja we will just agree to disagree, we had a difference of opinion on one thread it’s really not that serious.

Show quote history

I suppose it was the massively condescending

EYEEEEROLLLLL

That made it so irritating!

I mean an actual adult types out

EYEEEROLL

and tells others to stop posting!

Because we should be sympathetic to the OP? Despite PMs?

Original poster

BigMama32 · 27/12/2022 20:32

NinjaWarriorCooker · 27/12/2022 20:23

I suppose it was the massively condescending

EYEEEEROLLLLL

That made it so irritating!

I mean an actual adult types out

EYEEEROLL

and tells others to stop posting!

Because we should be sympathetic to the OP? Despite PMs?

Show quote history

Ninja we didn’t agree, that’s the end of it…
what would you like out of this conversation?

OP posts:

namechangeforthisoneeee · 27/12/2022 21:51

Sometimes I think there's some nasty bastards on here but admittedly sometimes I'm def more harsh than I would be in real life, if I feel strongly about my something. Having said that, when I've posted on the miscarriages pages I've had nothing but loveliness and sympathy so there are lots of nice people here

UsingChangeofName · 27/12/2022 22:46

tickticksnooze · 27/12/2022 18:55

If you read everyone's tone as "angry" or "bitter" then that's the impression you will form. If you assume positive intent for most people, you can read the same posts in an entirely different way.

I've watched so many people declare others are angry/bitter/bullying/whatever simply for calmly expressing an opposing view. If you're reading everything as angry that says more about your own perception given that it's only text on a screen with no tone, body language, emotional expression, knowledge of the person, etc.

Just because someone doesn't agree with you that doesn't mean they are attacking you.

This.

Too many people who post seem to think that someone who holds a different opinion from themselves, or disagrees that they are (or aren't) BU must therefore be being 'unkind' or 'nasty to the OP' and struggle with the concept it isn't anything personal, but they can hold a different opinion and can think the OP's reasoning about whatever they post about is wrong, or at the very least, that there is another side to the story (so very often the case).

stillbewildered · 29/12/2022 14:06

If you think this is bad, explore GN, anyone with a concern involving family member, expecting helpful comments is told their dgd or whoever clearly has MH issues, a few posters clearly devoid of irony, with weak comprehension, ie do not read and. understand the OP then ask dumb questions and offer even dumber advice.
On here the spelling, speed of delivery, social awareness, grasp of technology, scathing put downs, bleak humour, is far superior.

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