My partner and I were supposed to spend Christmas together at my parents. My mum died a week ago suddenly and my partner decided not to come for Christmas. He did drive me hours to get to my family and stayed with me and drove me back when my mum died as I was in total shock when it happened. No questions and stayed up with me when I couldn’t sleep. He was amazing and supportive. Helped my dad too
his reason for not coming was I needed to be with my dad and help sort things out. He couldn’t do this as only met my parents twice. My dad couldn’t also grieve in front of him - pretending to be strong. Partner only heard my dad cry when he was out the room.
Partner went abroad to his brother for a few days, I went to my dads. I was disappointed but understood. However my partner had been very silent and I think in a huff. He sent quite a few messages drunk over the days asking for flirty pictures. I am not happy to send them and told him. He knows I don’t think this. Partner telling me I would rather him look at naked internet pictures than him look at me. had a few sober phone calls too.
yesterday he suggested we go away over new year for a few days. I said to him it was a lovely thought, but I have hardly slept or been in my own house over last 2 weeks. I just want to chill and can’t really get a pet sitter that short notice. Happy to do an overnight, but not a few days. I haven’t really slept since my mum died and want my own bed. I did suggest a mini break in a luxury hotel I got given a gift for in January- no reply.
since I said no to a few days away, he hadn’t texted me. I have sent him a text, but no reply. He is active of Facebook. This is unusual as he is normally good at keeping in touch. He knows I wasn’t too chuffed about him not coming, but I understood. We had separate plans at new year and he had offered to cancel. I have said to him to go as I am not too sure if I want to celebrate.
now I fully appreciate I am sleep deprived, bored, unable to grieve as staying strong for my dad and not having the Christmas planned. But the not sending naughty pictures and saying I don’t want to go away for a few days, I feel he has gone silent and feels rejected. I do know he is with family and friends, so will be busy as he says it’s a party each night.
am I right to be annoyed? Feel I am getting punished for not sending naughty pictures or agreeing to his plan to go away. I really feel like ending it.