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Original poster

The shit Christmas presents of 22 thread.

721 replies

ChristmasPresentsof22 · 25/12/2022 17:10

Another year, another round of presents from family that I cannot use. I have a serious food allergy and another health condition that means that I can't eat or use some foods/cosmetics. These are not new health issues, had them since childhood, yet there is not a single gift out of the few that I received that I can make use of. I decided to be blunt this year (after years of unsuaitable gifts) and tell the givers that I can't use their gifts due allergy etc but thanks anyway. Now I'm an ungracious brat. Am I? "It's not their fault I'm fussy." I'm really not, I just don't want to get sick. I would prefer not to do the gift thing as I'm not overly bothered about that part of Christmas, but I would be ruining it for everyone else, everyone else who gets decent thoughtful presents based on knowing what they like, it's shit when those thoughts are not reciprocated.

Anyone else want to join the naff presents club.

OP posts:
Nicola101177 · 28/12/2022 10:07

My dad arrived with gifts for my kids and husband but nothing for me. Then he said ‘I’ve emailed you a gift voucher’ but he’d sent it to the wrong email address. I had to then mention it hadn’t arrived so we then had a back and forth where he insisted it WAS the correct email address 😂 it eventually arrived. We had him for lunch and he got several gifts from us. I bought the gifts for the grandkids, he wrapped them. He just can’t be arsed.

FlirtyMelons · 28/12/2022 10:11

Katypp · 28/12/2022 08:57

Some of these gripes over so-called crap presents are ridiculous.
The complainants all seem to have two things in common:

  1. They obviously are incredibly self-absorbed as they seem to expect people to hang onto their every word and remember short conversations from months earlier (menopause/chocolate). Either that or they expect people to know/guess/remember the minutae of their lives (preserver/chutney drafty house/doorstop) or constantly observe them (co-ordinate wardrobe/scarf)
  2. They all seem to spend inordinate amounts of time 'carefully choosing' the perfect gift for every single person they buy for and clearly regard themselves as a great gift giver.

I don't drink alcohol at all and I've lost count of the many bottles of wine I have received over the years. Most people to drink. They go to tombolas/raffles or are kept for next Christmas.
I can't stand body lotion or hand cream but they always, seem to make their way into a gift box. Most women do like these things apparently. They also go to tombola etc or to my mum or daughter who do like them.
I only wear muted greens, blues, black and ochre (colour capsule warbrobe done as last year's NY resolution) so thus year's pink jumper from my mum will have to be changed. I did tell my mum thus, but as she spends most of her time looking after my increasingly-disabled dad, I don't expect my wardrobe quirks to he top if her agenda.

I couldn't disagree more, if I love and care about someone I want to put thought and effort into their present otherwise its lazy and shows I don't give a shit. Buying someone something they are allergic to or something 3 sizes too big is so insulting.

If its a generic gift, eg someone you don't know well but you need to buy a gift then I can understand wine or something but for someone who knows you for them to buy you alcohol when you don't drink is thoughtless. On this thread people are talking about their closest friends and family members, those who are supposed to love and know you the most. I don't understand how you can't understand how this is hurtful for those receiving these shit gifts.

JustDanceAddict · 28/12/2022 10:15

I got chocs from a work colleague which was a lovely thought but she knows I’m not eating chocs atm due to some health issues!! Oh well, the family will eat them!!

NippyWoowoo · 28/12/2022 10:15

Midsizegal29 · 27/12/2022 19:05

@Willowswood tbf i do like a hand cream 😂 I get very dry hands so tend to keep one in my bag, one in my desk, one in the car etc as my skin gets so dry it cracks! Secret Santa presents are always disappointing I think! I feel like I usually put effort in and get tat back so have stopped taking part!

Same, I like 'generic' gifts like hand creams, soap sets and candles. BUT I'm particular, and don't like eg fruity scents for candles etc. I'm a nanny so my boss asks me what I like/don't like and I've not been disappointed. She gets lovely scented things from stores like White Company, I don't normally buy things for myself from there but everything just smells nice. I once got gifted a Caramel candle from a friend and the smell made me sick so sadly that got binned Blush

I believe in communication for gift giving, I ask friends what they like or if I haven't had time I give a gift card from a store I know they like. Life's too short for shit presents Grin

PolPickle · 28/12/2022 10:20

Not being ungrateful but MIL gave the usual hotel freebies from her recent trip, makeup brushes (I don't wear make up as she knows), 4 lots of chocolate (I don't eat chocolate), a broken umbrella ("I'm sure DH can fix it"), a childs bracelet that doesn't fit.

I'd rather she made a donation to a charity of my choice.

Rottweilermummy · 28/12/2022 10:24

Generally ecstatic with what I got for Xmas except; from.my work secret santa ,everyone at work who I have told what I got were like no way really that's rubbish as its def not me I'm putting it down to one of the new girls..(or someone that doesn't like me much lol) alot of people would appreciate it and I've thanked and said I love it on our communal thankyou santa list. A dove self tanning set! I don't do self tan nor ever have lol , also got white chocolate truffles not white chocolate fan but it's still chocolate , and at least it came with some shower gel 😁

NippyWoowoo · 28/12/2022 10:28

SylvieB74 · 28/12/2022 01:25

I’ve got a sort of best friend who can be weird with presents, normally just that it’s a load of crap like she gave me shampoo for my birthday last year, one year she gave me 2nd hand earrings full of crap out of someone’s ears who’s probably died wearing them, one year she put warren james earrings in a Pandora box and another year she asked my daughter what she’s getting me and she told her all happily that she’s getting me a big dog ornament, then she went and bought it for me instead. Anyway to top it all this year she gave my daughter some bottles of gin, she left them in our house in a gift bag for her to come around and open on Christmas Day, the only problem with that is we’re a Muslim family and we’ve spent most of this year in a very awkward situation with my daughter as she ran off with a lad and we found out that she goes out drinking and we’ve been very upset about it. We’ve had to come to terms with it and accept her for what she is but we don’t talk about that with her, it just felt like she was trying to throw a grenade into our Christmas Day when we’ve just been back in contact for a few weeks 😕

It's insensitive of your friend, but 'accepting your daughter for what she is' sounds really horrible.

SylvieB74 · 28/12/2022 10:43

Who she is or what she does then, it was maybe badly worded sorry 🙈 we certainly haven’t had a horrible attitude towards her, we’ve been so happy to have made up with her.

ToWhitToWhoo · 28/12/2022 11:49

Katypp · 28/12/2022 08:57

Some of these gripes over so-called crap presents are ridiculous.
The complainants all seem to have two things in common:

  1. They obviously are incredibly self-absorbed as they seem to expect people to hang onto their every word and remember short conversations from months earlier (menopause/chocolate). Either that or they expect people to know/guess/remember the minutae of their lives (preserver/chutney drafty house/doorstop) or constantly observe them (co-ordinate wardrobe/scarf)
  2. They all seem to spend inordinate amounts of time 'carefully choosing' the perfect gift for every single person they buy for and clearly regard themselves as a great gift giver.

I don't drink alcohol at all and I've lost count of the many bottles of wine I have received over the years. Most people to drink. They go to tombolas/raffles or are kept for next Christmas.
I can't stand body lotion or hand cream but they always, seem to make their way into a gift box. Most women do like these things apparently. They also go to tombola etc or to my mum or daughter who do like them.
I only wear muted greens, blues, black and ochre (colour capsule warbrobe done as last year's NY resolution) so thus year's pink jumper from my mum will have to be changed. I did tell my mum thus, but as she spends most of her time looking after my increasingly-disabled dad, I don't expect my wardrobe quirks to he top if her agenda.

I partially agree - I don't think that love and caring should be measured by how good someone is as a 'gift chooser' and am rather shocked by a few comments to the effect that a less-than-imaginative gift equates to 'not giving a shit'. I dislike the perfectionism that some people attach to Christmas, and the harsh judgements of people- usually women- who are considered not to 'make enough effort' with regard to cooking, hosting or present selection. But the OP and a few others were not talking about someone being unaware of or forgetting their current preferences. The OP was talking about a sibling disregarding allergies that had been present since childhood, and reacting to her eventual complaint with 'Well, it's not our fault you're fussy'. Having one's allergies or other medical problems sneered at as 'fussiness', especially by a family member, is EXTREMELY hurtful, quite apart from the unsuitable presents,

DilemmaADay · 28/12/2022 12:01

Most thoughtless (birthday not Christmas) was from my Dad for my 30th birthday. Two bottles of the same wine from Aldi and some chocolate he'd picked up on the way, complete with the carrier bag and "I didn't really know what to get you, and didn't really have time".
That stung. I love wine and Aldi but it felt like it was such a half hearted present with zero thought. His girlfriend had words though and I got something a bit more thoughtful a few weeks later. Then for Christmas the same year as the 30th (this is going back a few years now) two bottles of wine from Aldi because "I never really know what you want". This is despite me saying a few weeks before that I had an idea for what he could get me (ironically it was cheaper than the two bottles of wine) and him saying "it's alright I've already got you sorted".

I now give him a months notice of what I'd like, and this seems to work.

imnotthatkindofmum · 28/12/2022 12:16

KateM91 · 28/12/2022 04:19

My son is 6 and he is tall for his age. All family are aware of this, they see him regularly 😂 my Nan, dad and my brother girlfriend all got him items of clothing that are size 5-6. Not even size 6. And he’s in 7-8. He’s very long. It just annoys me. He will get maybe one wear out of them, that just to be less wasteful. My brother girlfriend maybe yes I can say honest mistake she has met him once. But she knows he is 6, not 5. If a child is 6 you buy 6-7 right? If they don’t do 6-7 then buy 7? Always better for clothes to be a little big and grown into? Right? All clothes will go to my friend for her son but just means I have to buy something else for my son to make up for losing a gift 😒

My mum has a habit if buying clothing way in advance. She bought my daughter aged 10-11 pjs as she was 9-10 at start of summer. She's had a massive growth spurt and is now in 11-12 mostly so these pjs will prob only be worn a few times 🙄🤦🏽‍♀️

FlirtyMelons · 28/12/2022 13:32

ToWhitToWhoo · 28/12/2022 11:49

I partially agree - I don't think that love and caring should be measured by how good someone is as a 'gift chooser' and am rather shocked by a few comments to the effect that a less-than-imaginative gift equates to 'not giving a shit'. I dislike the perfectionism that some people attach to Christmas, and the harsh judgements of people- usually women- who are considered not to 'make enough effort' with regard to cooking, hosting or present selection. But the OP and a few others were not talking about someone being unaware of or forgetting their current preferences. The OP was talking about a sibling disregarding allergies that had been present since childhood, and reacting to her eventual complaint with 'Well, it's not our fault you're fussy'. Having one's allergies or other medical problems sneered at as 'fussiness', especially by a family member, is EXTREMELY hurtful, quite apart from the unsuitable presents,

Show quote history

There's nothing wrong with generic gifts, that's one of my favourite things at Xmas, getting shower gels, creams, chocs etc you wouldn't usually buy yourself however for instance my immediate family and close friends know I only drink red wine so if they bought me white wine I'd be disappointed as they know I don't drink it, its not about cost or status of gifts at all, just putting in some effort. For serious allergies it's even worse! My mum doesn't drink at all as has liver disease so would be really thoughtless if we bought her alcohol!

Lee45 · 28/12/2022 14:00

You have to put up a wish list and share it over text, WhatsApp whatever, randomly throughout the year! I shared mine again 3 weeks before Christmas. This is my first Christmas I didn't get a bag of crap from my family! It was lovely to get a book I had been wanting and actually things I could use 😊

Mumofone545 · 28/12/2022 14:58

My 8 year old son got a shavein set from a close family member 🤣

MummyToOrla · 28/12/2022 15:04

We mostly gave up on gifts for adults a few years ago and now only buy for the children. We don't subscribe to having tonnes of plastic tat around the house and would rather have a handful of things that will last, can be used in a range of ways and that will be well loved rather than loads of limited stuff that will last a couple of weeks before it is forgotten about or broken. In-laws (MIL and BIL) don't get this philosophy at all and must spend £100-£150 each on the three girls and buy tonnes of flimsy stuff for the sake of the girls having loads to unwrap. We tried negotiating for 1 small gift each and an annual family pass to the local zoo/Sealife/national Trust membership etc and were stared at like we were insane.

Lynniebee · 28/12/2022 16:33

Why wait until after the festivities? Now seems like a good time

Lynniebee · 28/12/2022 16:38

Put them on Vinted

CrazyLadie · 28/12/2022 16:47

TheKeatingFive · 25/12/2022 17:23

I love bath bombs 😆

I have a small collection of scented candles, which I hate. I'll seek out alternative homes for them though.

I jave plenty bath bombs I don't use and love scented candles 😉

SunnyCoco · 28/12/2022 19:59

AzureOrchid · 26/12/2022 09:49

I got two pairs of slippers , neither of them in the right size

Got a pair of pyjama bottoms , but no pyjama top 😳 and it’s not like the separate lounge trouser type bottoms , it definitely random part of a set without a top.

Omg I got a random top half of a pj set! Let's get together 🤣

Justdoitmumma · 29/12/2022 01:53

That sounds like then worse picture ever

OlympicProcrastinator · 29/12/2022 06:53

Bottle of gin.
Im tea total and always have been.

I save them every year to give to to the school tombola at Christmas so not all bad I suppose.

Bleachmycloths · 29/12/2022 08:17

OlympicProcrastinator · 29/12/2022 06:53

Bottle of gin.
Im tea total and always have been.

I save them every year to give to to the school tombola at Christmas so not all bad I suppose.

Yes, but it means you miss out on a present every year 😢. I have a similar problem but the gifts we get from one particular relative are such 💩 that I’d be too embarrassed to offer them to a tombola 😀

OlympicProcrastinator · 29/12/2022 08:21

@Bleachmycloths Oh my goodness they must be bad! The school Tombola is where all crap Christmas presents go to die.

Im sure I’ve seen the same Bayliss & Harding soap set won and re-donated the following year about 3 times now 😆

NoInvitesEver · 29/12/2022 20:33

I got a very obviously male bottle of shower gel from MIL. DH had 2 bottles of after shave in very similar fragrance. I think I'm meant to give it to him, which I will as it is a very manly smell.

Adelesky · 29/12/2022 21:21

Secret Santa are the worst. People should donate the money to charity instead of buying a shed load of tat. We stopped doing it 3 Years ago. Blesses relief!