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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

christmas with newborn?

71 replies

hohohow · 23/12/2022 19:56

dd will be 4 days old on christmas. original plan was to go for christmas dinner at my dgms house with about 10 family members total. she was born 36 weeks so slightly prem. one family member has said they have a cough/cold but still going. one is currently out drinking in packed bars so if anything is going around i’m worried she’ll catch it and give it to baby.

i don’t know whether to go or not - advice please. don’t know if i’m overthinking it

OP posts:
addler · 23/12/2022 20:24

Even if everyone was healthy I wouldn't go. But seeing as someone is sick I really wouldn't. I'm currently holding my 6 week old in HDU as she got RSV, bronchiolitis and pneumonia from someone who had a slight cold. It's been horrific.

SnackSizeRaisin · 23/12/2022 20:26

I would stay home. That's too many people at such a young age and there are some really nasty bugs around currently. If the baby was 3 months I would go

SplashparkSummer · 23/12/2022 20:29

humblesims · 23/12/2022 20:05

my first DC was a week old at christmas and my wonderful DSil brought me round a fully plated up christmas dinner and held the baby while I ate it. I'll never forget that.

That's lovely 😊

FestiveDove · 23/12/2022 20:29

I’d absolutely stay at home OP.

chillidoritto · 23/12/2022 20:30

PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog · 23/12/2022 20:23

There's no such thing as 'slightly prem' OP and at 36 weeks, they would not be considered prem. Hmm

Crikey who's rattled your cage? I had one at 36 weeks and yes it was classed as "slightly prem" - by the hospital!

Original poster
hohohow · 23/12/2022 20:31

PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog · 23/12/2022 20:23

There's no such thing as 'slightly prem' OP and at 36 weeks, they would not be considered prem. Hmm

okay then just premature. 36 weeks is classed as premature according to nhs

OP posts:
Original poster
hohohow · 23/12/2022 20:32

addler · 23/12/2022 20:24

Even if everyone was healthy I wouldn't go. But seeing as someone is sick I really wouldn't. I'm currently holding my 6 week old in HDU as she got RSV, bronchiolitis and pneumonia from someone who had a slight cold. It's been horrific.

aw no, i hope she gets better soon! poor little poppet xx

OP posts:
FestiveDove · 23/12/2022 20:34

@addler thats awful. 😢 I really hope
your little one recovers quickly.

LittleMG · 23/12/2022 20:34

I had a newborn at Christmas too. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STAY AT HOME. You’ll be completely shattered and just want to be at home just you and your other half. Believe me it’ll be a nightmare.

axillarytailofspence · 23/12/2022 20:38

Please stay at home. Give yourself and your baby quality time at home. Plenty of time in the future to socialise.

Midwife

Ineedsleepandcoffee · 23/12/2022 20:39

PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog · 23/12/2022 20:23

There's no such thing as 'slightly prem' OP and at 36 weeks, they would not be considered prem. Hmm

36 is considered premature, classified as late preterm but still preterm.

JingleC · 23/12/2022 20:39

Four Christmas's ago I had a 4 day old baby on Christmas day. We stayed home. The grandparents came to us for a coffee in the morning then all buggered off so I could eat my supermarket prepared dinner with my massive leaky boobs out.

sayanythingelse · 23/12/2022 20:39

Congratulations! I've had a baby 8 days before Christmas and another 6 weeks before. We've had a quiet Christmas both times.
Enjoy your time with your new baby, it's absolutely lovely to have a newborn at this time of year ... not so much in future years when it's expensive Wink

BatshitBanshee · 23/12/2022 20:40

STAY AT HOME! for your own sake as well as baby's. Former NICU mum here. Baby doesn't need to be around sick people at that stage and you don't need to be up and about at 4 days PP, prime milk coming in day/baby blues and also you just had major fucking surgery OP. Stay home, enjoy your babies and take it easy.

MrsR87 · 23/12/2022 20:40

PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog · 23/12/2022 20:23

There's no such thing as 'slightly prem' OP and at 36 weeks, they would not be considered prem. Hmm

My baby was born at 37+3 in August. I was in hospital from 34 weeks. They kept monitoring and pushing me to get to 37 weeks anything before that, even 36+6 is not classed as full term and therefore premature. Of course there is a big different to the baby being born “slightly” prematurely at 36 weeks and very prematurely at say 30 weeks.

MrsSkylerWhite · 23/12/2022 20:41

Stay home. If it were March, no-one would have expectations.

mybluecar · 23/12/2022 20:43

If everyone was well, I’d be tempted to pop up for a Christmas dinner but absolutely not if people are unwell. Not worth the risk.

SultanOfSwing · 23/12/2022 20:48

I’d say do whatever you feel like doing, and don’t worry too much. At only a few days old your baby, especially if she is breastfed, will be protected by your antibodies. Just be firm about keeping her exclusively with you and your partner, and not handing her around. Make sure your DP is ready to protect you and back you up in this.

OTH if you don’t feel like going - even at a last minute change of mind - then don’t go! These first few weeks are all about you and your baby. It won’t always be like that as you know.

BogRollBOGOF · 23/12/2022 20:49

Rest up at home. You need to recover and there's a lot of respiritory illness around that could be very unpleasant in a very new baby barely reaching their due date.

I had a 6 day old one Christmas. The birth had been somewhat epic; I'd ended up in HDU.

My friends brought Christmas Dinner over. Baby's due date was around Christmas so we didn't have anything bought in as there was no way of planning what state of pregnancy/ birth/ post-natal we'd be at. I wasn't fit to stand and cook while pregnant anyway, so the plan always was for friends to have enough for us if necessary. It was a nice day with no pressure and I could rest at my own pace. I do remember sniggering very hormonally at the poor stuffed turkey though 😂

Ruffpuff · 23/12/2022 20:54

I wouldn’t go. Not because the baby would be at risk, they’re fairly resilient just after being born, I had all sorts of illnesses and ds didn’t get any until 6 mo (though I acknowledge yours was a week early). I had an emcs. I know how hard it is, it’s very easy to push yourself in the beginning and then feel the burden later on. Also, day 4 pp was the worst for me (and I’ve heard this is common for many women), I couldn’t stop crying. I was an emotional, hormonal wreak.

Zanatdy · 23/12/2022 20:55

No I wouldn’t risk it. Stay home and get some party food to make it easy

NameChagaiiiin · 23/12/2022 20:56

chillidoritto · 23/12/2022 20:30

Crikey who's rattled your cage? I had one at 36 weeks and yes it was classed as "slightly prem" - by the hospital!

Show quote history

Born before 37 weeks is premature

36.5 weeks here and nurses and midwife and health visitors all used slightly prem.

OP, I would use it as the best excuse to stay comfy at home. Congratulations

Squidlydoo · 23/12/2022 20:57

I echo others. Say thanks but no thanks. Snuggle at home with the tv.

if they’re close enough to plate your a dinner and drop it over… even better!

Ontheflipside_ · 23/12/2022 21:00

Stay at home and rest. There will be lots more Christmas's 😊 congratulations on your baby!

Ontheflipside_ · 23/12/2022 21:01

PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog · 23/12/2022 20:23

There's no such thing as 'slightly prem' OP and at 36 weeks, they would not be considered prem. Hmm

Anything before 37 is prem...