To think they could have found something else to put in DD’s report?

[FrustratedandFestive]

Feeling a bit sad. I probably am being unreasonable, but it’s been a hard few months.

DD is dyslexic. She struggles with spelling and writing but is however good at music - she’s a chorister at our local cathedral, plays a couple of instruments, etc.

We’ve just received her school report. I knew it might make for quite tricky reading this year as she is finding things quite hard at the moment. I’m a bit sad, though, that her music teacher has spent almost the whole music report talking about her spelling of various musical instruments and her handwriting, and has marked her down as a result.

AIBU to think that they could have found something else to talk about in relation to music, given that this is an area which she does love and where we are trying to build her confidence? It has left me feeling as through even the things she can do well are always going to be assessed through the filter of this disability. Why does her spelling matter when she’s playing the flute really well..?

That's crap op and I'd be inclined to ask to speak to her music teacher in the new year. Do they know she's dyslexic? Ask for a report on her music progress as it wasn't covered in her report, just details on her disability that you're well aware of.

Agreed, that is a shame. How old is she? State school or independent? I’m assuming independent to be getting a detailed music report at this point in the year?! When writing subject reports I would never comment on spelling, particularly for a dyslexic child where it’s a given they’ll struggle.

Absolutely horrible and you’ll need to keep a close eye that this teacher doesn’t kill your daughters passion for music. I’d be furious and would be writing a few words for sure.

YADNBU

I'd be getting in touch with teacher after Xmas to 'remind' them of your daughter's dyslexia diagnosis.

What has the teacher actually put? I would reserve being ‘furious’ or anything unless it’s been very harsh. Generally when I write reports much of the focus is on improvements and next steps - I usually would write only a very short sentence on what the child does now, moving into what are areas for improvement and gaps in learning, because they’re really the important things.

As well - the teacher won’t have ‘marked her down’ maliciously. There is more to a music GCSE than just being able to play the flute, so the teacher will be identifying gaps that need filling/where support is needed, because there is a written aspect to the course too.

I’m dyslexic and my teachers did not focus on spelling and handwriting as it’s linked to my disability. It was also taken into account by examiners so there really is no need for teachers to continue to highlight it knowing any improvement will be limited. Agree with other posters schedule a meeting with the teacher to discuss why it’s not appropriate for them to penalise her for a disability.

Yes that does sound a shame OP. My Eldest is dyspraxic with horrific handwriting but very very good at maths. He once had a teacher who spent the entire time in maths critisizing his presentation and how quickly he filled in the times tables on the computer (which was still above average but he's not a quick typer). I ended up sending her an email and she phoned me up for a discussion and after my input she really made an effort to allow him to do more challenging work which boosted his confidence alot.

The teacher should have mentioned some positives or course, but the written aspect is very important too so it cannot be ignored.

Absolutely this.

I'd be fuming about that OP.

They should be celebrating it as an area of strength for her!

My DC is dyslexic so I know exactly where you're coming from. A couple of years ago a school report said they needed to work to avoid "silly" spelling mistakes. I wasn't pleased. I spoke to the teacher and pointed out that in any situation I thought the use of "silly" in a report wasn't wise, but in this instant, I thought it was completely inappropriate. They changed the report to include actual examples of where the kid could improve. I don't think you'll be in any way wrong to ask for that. Also, what adjustments does your daughter have in place? One of my children pretty much only types now - makes their life much much easier and has hugely improved their work.

I would be feeling sad too , but i think this is more a reflection on the teacher , who must be lacking in enthusiasm and imagination if this is their focus, when music is their subject.
I think i would be reminding them of my child's difficulties too but none of this will matter in the future when your child is free to pursue their interests free from the one size fits all restraints of school.

@kanaloa Generally when I write reports much of the focus is on improvements and next steps - I usually would write only a very short sentence on what the child does now, moving into what are areas for improvement and gaps in learning, because they’re really the important things.

When do you share your positive comments then, do you do that somewhere else? If children's achievements are never acknowledged and celebrated they will think its not worth bothering. Parents want to hear what their child does well, not just where they need to improve. How sad.

That’s unfair, I’d speak to the school.

I had this when dyslexic DC was younger. Mostly each teacher was highly critical of the areas he struggled in.

Never mind that he was amazing at maths and physics.

As he got older and could give subjects up things got far better and his many abilities were appreciated.

Good spelling and handwriting are nice to have but not so important now there are superior spelling checkers built into computers.

He got 1sts in his degree and masters and passed tricky professional exams with no resets.

Defend your child to the teachers and try to boost the child''s confidence.

No retakes!

It wouldn't surprise me at all if it turns out that the music teacher has not been advised of her dyslexia, or at least is not up to speed on how dyslexic students should be supported.

To continually go on about spelling mistakes when someone is unable to do anything about it is akin to mentioning that a student with hearing difficulties doesn't always listen to instructions properly.

Well as I said ‘much of the focus’ is on improvement. I do also of course mention the positives and strengths in the child’s work. Which is why I said I would reserve fury/kicking off etc since op hasn’t actually shared what the report said fully.

Ds has hypotonia & even after school had been notified that he would never progress with handwriting & must use a laptop in school, all that was ever on his reports was that his writing was bad even though he had come top in at least 5 subjects.

This.

My son was told at primary that the reason he got working below in RE was that he didn’t put his hands together to pray in assembly 😂🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

My daughter with her foot in a cast for 6 months after surgery for a medical foot issue had a PE report that said ‘she struggles to maintain her balance when running’ I did take both of those to the head.

It's very rare to actually get comments in reports these days, due to teacher workload. Mine just a grade for a progress against a fairly meaningless target and a score for attitude to learning.

One of ds1s reports in primary school interchanged he/she all the way through. The comments were bland and generic and very much a copy and paste job.

Ds2 has dyslexia. His French teacher once told us at a GCSE choice information evening that he struggled with French spellings. My reply " no shit Sherlock he has dyslexia and struggles to spell in English meaning it's not exactly a surprise that he can't spell in French either" was a bit of a shock to her as she had no idea. Her relief on being told he wouldn't be taking French was rather apparent.

I wouldn't worry about that sort of crap in school reports. If you are happy with where they are day to day, with no meetings with teachers outside of the usual parents evenings then the report is just to give you an idea of what's happening. I would check that all of your dc teachers are aware of the dyslexia though.

Thanks to everyone who’s replied. I’m glad to know it’s not that I’m being oversensitive. It is an independent school - a large one, so possibly he has forgotten that she’s dyslexic, even though he was asked to contribute comments for the dyslexia assessment earlier this term.

Her target for next term is to write her work more neatly. As the dyslexia report (a copy of which school has, of course) also mentioned that she might have possible dysgraphia, it seems unlikely that this is going to miraculously happen by January. She is pretty much spending the holiday learning to type. This just feels pretty tough for her.

Hi I'm a music teacher who is also dyslexic and I think the most important thing is to reassure your daughter that being dyslexic doesn't mean that she can't achieve academically. I have a PhD. I am fairly flippant with my students in regards to dyslexia though because so very many students believe they 'can't' do something (usually read) because they are dyslexic, which a few posters have also alluded too but that's not true. Dyslexia makes things more difficult and you have to develop different strategies to get by but they very much CAN do things with the right support.

I think I'd be ask for clarification on what was meant by 'copying' as that might be for example notes on a stave rather than words which absolutely would down grade a student. I do always try to be positive in my students reports but actually playing the flute often has little to do with a mainstream curriculum which might well be more theory based (but don't write theory off for your daughter because of the dyslexia.....a love for the flute can absolutely drive theoretical prowess although it often comes a bit later!)