Seriously, f*ck Christmas!

[Eurydice84]

• I am working until Xmas eve. My entire family is staying over, but my Mum/Dad/bro refused to babysit when I will working because "they're too tired"
• DH and I are doing all the cooking. Every. Single. Year.
• No one drives so I will be the official chaffeur for the holidays
• I have been wrapping up presents for two weekends in a row
• I spent an entire day making a gingerbread house yesterday and it has v predictably collapsed on itself
• Pre-school party tomorrow, of course in the middle of the working day
• Just got soaked to the bone delivering Xmas cards around the village

Hitting the Bailey's hard today. How is this the most wonderful time of the year?

Just say no.

If it's too late to say no( if they've booked flights etc)
As soon as they arrive, delegate tasks for them to do( even if it's easier to do them yourself)
Tell them now, you are not able to act as a taxi due to expense
Personally I'd cancel regardless as you won't enjoy Christmas with them

Pretty much all of that is being orchestrated by you.

You need to suddenly develop covid

Christ almighty, that's a ridiculous attitude to take. Do you tell people with abusive partners to be grateful their partner is alive?

It's a lovely time of year if you don't martyr yourself. Stop.

There is a saying
If you act like a doormat, expect to be walked on.

What room?

Okay so they’re coming because they’ve booked flights but if they’ve got hands they can prepare veg, you can send them to the shops, you can make them get involved.

Your post isn’t amusing or lighthearted because you’re obviously very stressed. Decide what you really want to do and ditch the rest guilt free. No one cares as much as you do. It’s liberating when you realise that.

Me too , my parents are both now dead and I definitely am not offended by people having a moan about their unreasonable relatives , quite right too .

Or are you saying the room needs to read you?

Get on your phone and sent out an 'uninvite' to all of them.

They don't want to help? Fine. But they can fucking well sort out their own Christmas elsewhere, then, as you're done.

Just do it.

They'll either step up or sulk; either way, not your problem. Drop the rope.

Why do any of those things if they make you miserable/tire you out further on top of working? Just say "this year we will be having a rest and enjoying Christmas just us and the kids". Problem solved, nice break to enjoy.

I see most posters telling her she can scale back, none of this stuff is essential!

OP good on you for making a gingerbread house - i used to do them when the kids were small - do you have any dinosaurs in the house - if so put a t-rex in the middle of the house

I’m sure I’d enjoy Christmas a lot more if it was held in the middle of summer and didn’t involve quite so much rain, cold and darkness. It’s pure madness trying to organise a big family get together when you don’t know who is going to be snowed in.

My winters have been so much more enjoyable since we stopped doing Christmas.

Family are welcome to come to stay whenever they want but don't expect anything other than a bed and some food which they are capable of sorting out.

If it is, then I'm rude. I refuse to send cards. I hate receiving them too, so bloody wasteful. I haven't even put out the ones I've received this year, they're just sitting in a pile.

My parents are dead and I have very little contact with my sibling. I agree with you.

All of that is your choice and Baileys is sickening crap for people who don't like booze. You can't 'hit the Baileys hard'. Bloody hell.

Andsoforth I entirely agree. There is also a lot less chance of colds, coughs, norovirus and flu. My siblings and I used to meet up in the summer holiday when our children were small. Everyone could play outside, everyone was healthy and there were no worries about bad weather.

It's a winter solstice festival, though...having some light and cheer in rain, cold and dark is the entire point.

I agree with PPs that if it's that much hassle, more than it's worth, just don't don't it. Yes, there are times when you have a sick relative or something but those don't tend to be what people are complaining about in these discussions. We have a family friend who martyrs herself constantly, especially over Christmas, and gives in to everyone's demands to host ridiculous numbers and cater for them with almost no help, despite the fact that she's widowed, lives alone and has numerous health problems including a disability. So she does, and even makes the catering three times more complicated than it needs to be. You don't need three types of meat. You don't need two kinds of potatoes. You don't need a sodding smorgasboard of 98 different nibbles during the day.

None of her horrendous family respect or like her for this. They just take advantage of her martyr complex. Yes, we've tried to invite her over and rescue her from these people, but their claws go in deep...and anyway, she chooses to martyr herself. There's nothing in it for her. I don't understand it. It doesn't seem to make her happy.

Why don't people do what they really want at Xmas instead of knackering themselves with pointless traditions? And moaning about it?

You can, but I really don't advise it.