Inappropriate touching in primary school

[WhaleTanker]

If a boy (9) has been doing this, one child discloses to parent, parent reports it, school interviews a whole list of girls (yours among them), finds it has been happening to your girl over a sustained period, speaks with your girl about it, gives the group of girls a counselling session at break time....

Would you expect to be informed, as a parent?

Or would you expect to be sent on your jolly way for a lovely Christams break, and have a tearful DD9 tell you this evening about the investigation and counselling that took place at school all week?

I would absolutely expect to be told about it and if I wasn't I would be reporting the school for failing in every single area of safeguarding. So sorry this has happened.

Oh HELL no. I would be raising absolute hell over this. Why are the girls getting counselling but the perpetrator….what??? Carries on? What’s happening to him? Why weren’t you informed immediately. So many questions, so many things wrong about this. Jesus. Sorry OP 💐

He "wasn't at school" for the week.

What's the timeline for disclosure?

I don't know exactly. I think Tuesday the parents reported, Wednesday they were interviewed and Thursday they had the group talk.

I’d seriously consider pulling DD out over this. Of course it depends on full context, but on the basis that she’d otherwise have to face the boy who sexually assaulted her every day, I’d consider it.

Doesn’t sound like they’ve followed safeguarding protocol.

I’d not be happy at all with them handling it like that.

Of course I would expect to have been told. I am so sorry for what happened to your daughter and the others at school.

I’d be lodging a formal complaint with the LEA and reporting to OFSTED. A serious safeguarding breach like this should trigger an urgent inspection.

I’m a teacher and I would be considering reporting it to the police as I wouldn’t expect said boy to be allowed in the vicinity of my daughter ever again.

This is completely unacceptable. I say this as a teacher and safeguarding lead. I would be writing to the governors.

I feel very unsupported on this. I won't get an answer till after the hols now, as the school office is closed. I emailed in tonight, asking why I hadn't been told. Don't expect and answer. I have to sit on this now for 2 and a bit weeks!

I know who the other parents are, but I don't want to stir the pot.

Agreed. The parents should absolutely be told immediately

Feels like they hope it will blow over.

I would be livid.

I hope this boy is no longer in the school. For his own sake.

I would be complaining to the governors, OFSTED and the relevant headteacher.

Contact the LADO in your LA. They will be working over school holidays.

They've arranged counselling/ early help without your consent ??

Left you in limbo over Christmas???

Bloody hell id be making a complaint to OFSTED Monday morning although appreciate nothing would be done next week.

Contact Chair of Governors to put pressure on Head to respond.

Yes. LADO good idea. Worth a try.

Former social worker here. School may have handled this awfully but primary school aged child acting out this way is a red flag. Please tell social services or the NSPCC as there maybe plenty wrong on the home front that has not come to light from the schools internal investigation.

I would contact the chair of governors. And/or ofsted. Governors and heads should respond to serious queries like this despite it being the break.
It is totally unacceptable that you weren’t informed. Ofsted will take this very seriously and the recent KCSiE updates are related to sexually inappropriate behaviour.

Do the other parents know?
I’d contact the police if my child had been assaulted.

Unfortunately he's under the age if criminal responsibility and as the social worker said only social services can get involved.

If you know/suspect other parents who children have been victims of his behaviour then you need to encourage them to report it as well.

Be aware if his parents know to say the right things to social services nothing will happen until he's older and the age if criminal responsibility.

As there is no guarantee he won't be at the school in January so you need to look into moving your DD.

I wouldn’t care about stirring the pot, I’d be contacting the other girls parents to find out what they know, their DDs may not have even told them.

Do you not have the HTs email address? I’d me emailing them saying wtf is going on and cc’ing the chair of governors. Every HT I know dose not clock off straight away. I’ve had notifications all evening on class dojo from various teachers, including messages from one teacher about 20min ago.

Btw the school have probably tried to keep it silent for their own reasons. Once this information gets out a school can have reputational problems for years, and it sticks.

LADO, police, social services, official complaint via the proper channels at school.

And probably a post on the class Facebook/WhatsApp telling the other parents to talk to their girls. But then I'm a bit of a bitch who takes no shit with shitty schools!