To ask what inane shit your kids have argued or got upset about today

[LydiaBennetsUglyBonnet]

Our toilet is blocked so I went to buy a plunger after the school pick up from Screwfix. DD and DS (9 and 6 respectively) spent the whole car journey trying to grab it off each other and arguing over who deserves to play with it more.

I then got home and used the plunger in a toilet full of shit and have stuck it in a bucket full of bleach after I used it. They are asking every 2 minutes when the plunger will be ready to play with. I said it’s a tool I’ve used to unclog actual poo, go and play with your rooms full of proper toys!!

Disclaimer: this is a lighthearted thread. Please do not scrutinise my plunger use, parenting or try to diagnose my children with anything, thank you kindly

My 8 yo and 5 yo do this to each others Kids you tube accounts 😂

Who gets to grate cheese on their pasta first.

It's always the fucking cheese 🙄

Mind you, at the age of 36 I, 2 weeks post partum and clutching a newborn, ordered some mayonnaise for my chips at a family meal, and my brother helped himself to the lot.

Reader, it went off

This is hilarious. Did they deem the winner as the one who died first or the one who lasted longest on Earth? 🤣🤣🤣

Cruel and unusual mother, for mildly balking at a late Christmas request for £300 headphones. The dog ate his last £100 pair.

🤣😂🤣😂🤣
That's priceless!!

The comments about imaginary parrots & imaginary friends reminded me of 3yo DD telling me one day that she was really bored as her two imaginary friends kept arguing with each other. She didn't seem to realise that she had a choice in whether these arguments continued or not!

She's stolen my satisfaction. Brilliant!

Who won? 😉

My two's greatest hits include:

He's playing with one of MY hairs
That the mud I was playing with
He picked up that stick when it was OBVIOUS I wanted it
He breathed at me through a piece of toast

But today's argument was between me and my youngest over the logic of opposite world... 😬😂

Losing at a remote control car game which is involved one child trying to ram the other child with the car while both jumped on the trampoline. Sometimes I think of they just had a a single toy they would fight less but I know they would find a way.

Who had more ice cream - I had to weight the bowls to show them they had the same amount. They are 10 and 13. Too late for a refund unfortunately

Oh dear....this all reminds me of my two when they were younger (now grown adults). Mine could argue about anything. Once in the back of the car my son pretended to have imaginary strawberries and then proceeded to remove the imaginary "strawberries" so that his sister couldn't have any, which created the biggest screaming row....over something which wasn't even real!

I used to despair, there was no MumsNet in those days to gain support from, and I used to think the children weren't normal, arguing so much.

Just be reassured they all do it, and yes, mine grew up to be perfectly nice, well-functioning adults and yours will too.......!

The huge benefit of my daughter now being at secondary school is I no longer have the 30 min walk home with two kids, both furiously angry that the other one is getting to tell me more news from their day

"He's told you four things and I've only told you one."

Yes, but his four things took 30 seconds each, and your 'one' is a free-form narrative involving everything said by every child and teacher in your class and has taken 20 minutes so far.

Now I just have my son on the walk home so I get asked impossible questions about whether someone going north in Australia would be upside down compared to us, or how much a double decker bus weighs, or how they know where the international space station will crash. Equally taxing.

Aw I have this every day 😂
'She keeps talking over me! She never let's me talk, I never get to say anything!'

She wanted to open the bathroom door and I did it first.
The dog went down the stairs in front of her.
The dinosaurs are all dead.

Absolutely nothing.
They both are never anything but well behaved, helpful and always get along with one another.

They are 17 and 21. I thought I've give you all some hope!

10 years ago it wasn't unusual to have to keep them on different floors to try and stop the relentless moaning and bickering!!!

Mine cried actual real tears yesterday because I told his Aunty he was watching Mr Beast but he was actually watching Mr Who’s the Boss.

My 9 YO DD has just had an epic tantrum over wearing trainers to school. She has to wear them on her two PE days, rather than ordinary shoes.

Her argument is that it is sort of PE today. I finally snapped and said, "Fine, wear them if you want. When you get a detention, don't moan to me and if you do, your friend isn't coming for a sleepover."

She's finishing her berakfast quietly now.

breakfast

Gaah!

After all that, I've checked her planner and it IS PE today, not swimming. She just threw her swimming kit on the couch and I helped her get the bloody trainers done up

Simply getting out of the car. Was running a bit late as it took longer to defrost my car than I was expecting. The traffic to Ds1's school was very heavy so as we got near to the road the school is on, I said I'd drop him off there rather than spend aaages waiting to turn in and fight through the car park. I told him he just needed to get out quickly.
"I'm not getting out of a moving car!"
"I will stop the car. You just need to not faff."
"But I always faff, I don't know how not to faff!"
"Just get out."
"But the traffic is moving again!"
"I've stopped our car, so just get out!"
"But... but... but......"
"Stop playing bloody Pokémon and get out!"
The traffic had moved all of about ten centimetres and he was having a full on flappy shouty panic about it. He did get out, managing to tangle both his bag and his foot in the door on the way out. Don't ask me how. It was all I could do not to laugh, which wasn't helping.
Every morning is an argument about getting ready and getting out the door. Then there's the usual scrap over who is sitting in the front. Of course, whoever wins that one gets their seat kicked the whole way to school.

Mine have argued about a pack of hair bands being split between them. Hairbands that they didn't have before. Pack of 30. Because 15 each isn't enough. 🤦🏻‍♀️

My two boy cousins age 2 and 4,,arguing about who doesn't want to sit in the bath where the other ones 'dirty bottom has been '

My nephew and niece arguing if Baby Jesus's realm name is Baby Jimmy or Baby Jeff..full on slapping and hair pulling, The Holy Father would have been disgusted.

DD crying and arguing with me beause she was getting soaked wet.

She was in the bath and I was washing her hair.

That's really quite sweet