If Christmas is easy or hard work for you mentally?

[PrincesPoof]

This is pure curiosity…
im really struggling with Christmas and wonder how people get on with it.

I’m feeling a lot of pressure from family to see them, have fun and bet together. I imagine lots of people feel the financial pressure (although I’m not one of them)

i just wonder does anyone actually have a lovely Christmas where no one gets upset about seeing folks, presents, food, pressured fun etc etc

i wonder if I’m on my own with this 😞

That sounds hard @purplepricklypineapple hope you find some peaceful joyful times amid the strain.

I find it tough - mostly the family politics! I have an enormous extended family, and if one aunty, for example on mum's side, finds out we spent "more" time with dad's side then it all kicks off, and vice versa, and then the guilt of "oh you haven't seen such and such a person - you must see them". It's all absolutely lovely when we do see people but it's exhausting!
It's two days seeing mum's side and then dad's side, then DH is from a big family so day for each of the brothers and sisters is 4 days, plus day for mother and day for father side is 8 days of seeing people, and that's not even taking into account Xmas Eve, Xmas day, NYE plus carol services, school concerts for the kids, seeing friends who are around locally over Xmas.
I'm pregnant this year and it's been an exhausting pregnancy with lots of sickness etc, so I really HAVE to take it easy this year. I ended up in hospital on Boxing Day last year as I was just so run down and exhausted and had a nasty infection which wouldn't budge and I can't have that happen again this year when 7 months pregnant!
I absolutely LOVE it and am very family oriented but it does usually get to January and I feel like I've been hit by a bus 😂

christmas is dead easy for me i dont do it no decs tree cards gifts no family visits nothing nil zero love it im going on holiday from the 23 of dec to the 2 of jan i do it every year.

It's back to the future this year.

This is the first Christmas in three years I will not be at work. Nothing has been sourced online so I've been out with both my daughters to do some Xmas shopping. My family live quite close so we'll walk over to see them on Christmas day ( my inlaws are no longer resident but we will see them in the new year ). We've got a pile of logs and paper brick things to chuck on the fire and I will be going to church on Christmas eve. My husband is cooking but it's only a Turkey roast so not much of a stretch. The kids ( mid-late teens ) are quite excited and I put the tree up and decorated it myself. We've even got a tree at the stables. I posted the cards before the strike and I've got loads of wrapping paper and stuff left over from last year. I'm really looking forward to it.

It can be a lot and in the past I certainly got to the point when I stopped enjoying anything. There was a particularly Xmas when I was heavily pregnant with my second child which nearly broke me and contributed to a significant postnatal breakdown. I should have said no many many more times than I did!

I’m getting a lot better at gatekeeping now. Principally as we are mid-house renovation this year we are going by to a hotel, all inclusive and with lots for the DC to do. I am extremely excited and looking forward to a proper break. I realise that we are very lucky to be able to do this.

In terms of presents whoever possible I have ordered online and had it delivered wrapped directly. The majority of the extended family/ family friends etc are getting a beautiful bunch of red xmassy flowers delivered on 19th Dec. Much easier!

We will probably host next year so that will be a challenge in terms of not being overwhelmed again but I will buy far more food than I cook and my in-laws WILL STAY IN THE LOCAL PREMIER INN whatever DH says. And their bloody smelly dogs can go elsewhere. Despite what DMIL says they do not ‘know it is Xmas’

Start Early.

If you find xmas stressful, or have any ''letting people down'' feelings - start early.

Oct - start making firm plans about where you will be and/or who is coming to yours.
Start buying presents and write it down. What you bought who it's for. ASK people what they want. Ask them to give you a couple of ideas. Use Amazon wish lists for kids.

Nov - aim to get the presents all bought by the end of this month. Wrap them in batches while watching TV.
Keep an eye out for the meat to go on a deal where ever you shop and get it and bung it in the freezer.

First half of Dec - get the rest of your freezable nibbles and bits. Get your pickles and your booze in.
Next week coming is the week for cream/veg ect which need eating up by new year.

My big stresses are:
Will i remember to get the food out of the freezer!?! (i never have yet ... post it notes up)
Will i fuck the dinner up for 8 people?!? (i never have yet ... no idea why i would suddenly fuck a roast dinner up but i still stress )

Oh - and NO xmas cards

I've always found it easy.

For me in general it's an enjoyable time & the process of making plans, buying presents sorting etc is fun and not pressured.
Only issue is my extremely full on job which is taking over my life & making it difficult to have any time for the fun stuff. Struggling with 1 week to go!

Despite my family in the States always asking me to come home for Christmas, I never do. The expense and expectations are harder to manage than actually letting them down. They get over my 'we're not coming home' very quickly, thank goodness. Still, they're very duty-bound, my family back home. They would expect me to shell out the £3k on plane tickets that I don't have and show up with a sleigh full of gifts to give cousins who haven't even contacted me since MySpace existed. The thing that does annoy me with friends and family back home is that they always find it amazing that on a bog-standard weeknight in the UK (Thanksgiving in the US), I haven't been cooking up a T-rex-sized turkey in my tiny oven for ten hours. I STILL get asked, "Are you cooking the turkey?" 25 years away from the States, having never celebrated Thanksgiving in ALL of those years. No. I am not cooking the fecking turkey. They don't sell turkeys in November! And even if they did...
Right. I need to leave this thread and hop on over to stately homes.

But yeah, to get back to the tone of the thread, Christmas is pretty simple over here. The gift-giving financially kills me a bit. My circle is very small but still, it's a big expense. I host Christmas every year for my own kids and granny, ex-husband (I have two... the first one is welcome any time. The second one can go tuck himself in), and a friend or two. We keep it lite n lovely.

Easy. I only do things that I want to do (which is usually not doing Christmas). I don't have a huge family and my parents don't give a monkey's about Christmas, neither do I care about societal pressure or feel compelled to host people or get involved with whatever my boyfriend's doing. It's great, it costs me nothing and is completely stress free. More people need to learn how to say no.

I love Christmas! I love hosting, I love going to friends or family. We both work full time with young children so do everything online (food, booze, presents). I honestly don’t find it a hassle, it’s just a meal! I also love Christmas party snacks and seafood platters so tend to live off those and champagne over Christmas - no prep required!

We have generally very low expectations for Christmas, but I think in a good way! We're Christian, so alot of our focus is on how we can spend time understanding the Christmas story. We do Secret Santa for one side of the family, and gifts for kids on the other. We do get gifts for our kids, but it's very adult-led (we get stuff we think they'll like but they never write a Christmas list or anything). We take opportunities to enjoy Christmassy stuff if/when we can, but nothing is a deal-breaker so we don't end up under pressure.

No pressure here! I absolutely love Christmas!
I do my gifts shopping throughout the year so no big pay out for that later in the year, we don't have anything extra special on our Christmas dinner that wouldn't be on a usual roast dinner, except swapping chicken for a Turkey and adding pigs in blankets, which isn't a lot cost wise. I'm not super close to my family except my mum who I see regularly anyway so no pressure there, and we have a tradition to see DH parents on Boxing Day so no extra pressure there either, everyone else, we will see if it fits in with our schedule, but if not it's not worth stressing out over for us.

Christmas is as easy as I want it to be. The only pressure is from me and I have dialled it right back this year. Sadly we have lost a lot of family. DH is an only child of an only child and my mum’s siblings (deceased) were all child free. Dad’s family mixture mix of decreased and dysfunctional. I feel sad we don’t have a big family Christmas but it is what it is.

we have a tree, a few lights and decorations, presents for the kids, home baking and a cozy home. That is enough.

The pressure is self inflicted. I understand because I have done this to myself in the past but I’ve chilled out a lot this year. I had counselling, started exercising daily and lost 4.5 stone this year so now I’m fit and a healthy weight which is great. It’s transformed my mental health so now I just don’t care about small things as much as I used to.

I’ve noticed I’ve chilled out a lot this year. I wrapped the presents as they arrived so I don’t have a stack of 200 presents to wrap on Christmas Eve like usual. I’ve ordered all of the food online too so I know that’s sorted. Feel way better about the whole thing.