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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not let her go to Scout Jamboree in S Korea

94 replies

Iamnotausername · 15/12/2022 14:04

Or should that say what age would you let your child go to South Korea on a worldwide scout camp?

Would it depend on if they were a boy or girl?

The next scout jamboree is in S Koea in a few years time. There may be about 10 people including leaders from her troup or region who are going.

This is ignoring the financial aspect.

OP posts:
Iamnotausername · 15/12/2022 14:37

@NicLondon1 yes, Iknow S Korea and N Korea are different.

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Dotjones · 15/12/2022 14:38

I wouldn't want my daughter going to South Korea, no. It's not safe there. Aside from the very real threat of nuclear annihilation from the North, women and girls are at increased risk of predators, voyeurs and perverts in general in South Korea. This was the nation which "pioneered" the technique of using specialist cameras to look through women's clothes - there is an appalling amount of these "x-ray" images on the net. (I don't think they're actually x-ray machines in the medical sense, I'm just using the term as an illustration.

Unfortunately it's not just adult women who are victims, girls are too. You only have to look at the fact that South Korea recently raised the age of consent to 20 to try to curtail sexual relationships between older men and younger women. Traditionally the age of consent had been 13.

Iamnotausername · 15/12/2022 14:41

@BookShop you think I'm posting to judge people who are going? OK then. That makes sense. 🤨

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Randommother · 15/12/2022 14:43

It's an amazing opportunity, if you think she’s mature enough and she wants to go then yes, let her go.

Fenella123 · 15/12/2022 14:46

South Korea? Scout Jamboree?
Finances aside, I would have thought it would require VERY special reasons for them not to go. Probably easier for them to get into deep water in Belgium!!

KindergartenKop · 15/12/2022 14:49

Speak to the leaders about your concerns and equip her with the skills to tell the boys to piss off. She's only going to get prettier so she needs to learn how to deal with slimy guys. Don't let this hold her back from an amazing opportunity.

Hbh17 · 15/12/2022 14:50

It sounds like a fantastic opportunity, and will only be offered to people for whom it is age-appropriate. If finances aren't an issue, I can't think of any reason why she shouldn't go.

BookShop · 15/12/2022 14:51

@Iamnotausername if a space has become available I would jump at the chance to take it. Your daughter will learn and experience so much. The camps themselves are incredibly supervised and have strict ratios on adults to children. The fundraising is difficult but I am sure there is help available should you need it.

Your post did sound judgy to me. Why would your default be no? If the reasons for not going are not financial then what else is stopping you? FWIW my DD will be one of the younger ones from her area attending and has already made friends with loads of her unit. They will all be together and looking out for each other.

YouScumbagYouMaggotHeresKevinTheCarrot · 15/12/2022 14:56

I went to the jamboree in Sweden in the 90s. In terms of girl/boy relationships it was very tame and no one got a good chance to get up to mischief because they had good safeguarding policies in place.

We didn't leave the camping site unless with our host families and that was very controlled as well.

Of course, now scouts have the slight loophole where they allow natal boys to identify as girls so I don't know how that effects their single sex tent policy, might be worth asking about that because keeping the penis people out of our tents was simple and adhered to in the old days.

South Korea is a fairly safe country. Fairly cosmopolitan. I'd be scratching my head as to why it lends itself to scouting though. It's very built up.

But ultimately it does sound like an amazing opportunity.

YouScumbagYouMaggotHeresKevinTheCarrot · 15/12/2022 14:58

Scratch that I was thinking Singapore..south Korea not as built up lol.

WhyCantYourPartnerDoIt · 15/12/2022 15:02

Oh, well if she's pretty that's a completely different story.

🙄

CoffeeBoy · 15/12/2022 15:03

If there’s scout leaders and it’s in an a closed camp then that’s as safe as it gets surely. Apart from a bus from the airport to the site and maybe the odd supervised trip out then they’ll just be at a scout camp? South Korea is safe anyway, I’d say safer than the U.K.

dd went to a summer school at a Chinese university when she was 16yo without any leaders/teachers, etc. she knew one of the lecturers there and went over and lived on campus but frequently went out into the city on her own or with other students. She had a great time even if she was mobbed by locals a bit (blonde). But what a great experience.

ShaunaTheSheep · 15/12/2022 15:07

My DC went to USA as explorers and one is going to South Korea as IST ( basically as a volunteer). They had an awesome time.

It's a mixed event, with Girl Guides attending too. I wouldn't be concerned - safeguarding is absolutely a priority within UK Scouting.

MajorCarolDanvers · 15/12/2022 15:09

Its an absolutely amazing experience that your child will remember for the rest of their life. And they will make lifelong friends on it.

I would let my two go if they wanted to.

Girl or Boy makes not a bit of difference.

Dancingdragonhiddentiger · 15/12/2022 15:09

One of my kids 14, one not until they were an adult!

ShaunaTheSheep · 15/12/2022 15:09

Also meant to add, the young people will be in patrols, within their group, with older ones taking on some responsibilities, including pastoral care of the younger ones.

Iamnotausername · 15/12/2022 15:14

@WhyCantYourPartnerDoIt oh c'mon you know it does make a difference to teens. I am not for one second saying that only pretty girls get grief because that absolutely is not the case. However, she's pretty, stands out becausd she is very tall and looks older than she is and talks to anyone so of course she gets unwanted attention. I'm not going to play false modesty when that is a big part of my concern.

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Dilbertian · 15/12/2022 15:15

Why on Earth would you stop her? What an amazing opportunity! My ds went to the Jamboree in Japan when he was 14. He fundraised with another Scout from our town, a girl a few months younger than him. They both had an amazing time, with an excellent balance between safeguarding and freedom. They both got so much out of their experiences.

saraclara · 15/12/2022 15:16

I wouldn't hesitate. What a fantastic opportunity.

And if you're worried about her 'prettiness' that's more of an issue when she's out and about with her mates in your own locality, than at an adult supervised Scout jamboree.

Iamnotausername · 15/12/2022 15:17

Thanks for everyone's comments. I will ponder.

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WhyCantYourPartnerDoIt · 15/12/2022 15:19

My 🙄stands.

Squeezedsquash · 15/12/2022 15:20

In a shot. I know two kids going. It will be amazing.

GoingtotheWinchester · 15/12/2022 15:23

@Dotjones eh what? It’s a scout jamboree not a Tinder hook up 🙄

Iamnotausername · 15/12/2022 15:25

@WhyCantYourPartnerDoIt you can roll your eyes until they fall out of your head, but unless you are willing to express in words what is so awful about acknowledging someone's physical attributes, you're not going to get your point accross are you now?

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Eyesopenwideawake · 15/12/2022 15:26

I went to the one in Lincoln in 1977, aged 14. Spent the week smoking, drinking and necking scouts in the disco. T'was brilliant!!