Would it be unfair for me to tell my mum how Much I’ll miss her when she’s gone ? And wonder how I’ll cope

[Amiterrible]

or is that a bit too much ?
to tell her how I feel

would it be like a burden on her

She knows.

How old is she out of interest?

OP do you have your own kids? It would worry me so so much to hear that from my own kids and I'd feel I'd failed them a bit tbh.

Just enjoy her whilst she's here and make sure she knows you love her. I do think building resilience might help too. Push yourself out of your comfort zone if you're able to.

I'd think I would of failed as a mum if my daughter says that. The things is when the time comes, you will hurt and be devastated. Then you will learn to live with it and cope. It's ok to have these feelings now and again. I would refrain from telling her xx

no dont do that-realistically what do you want her to do apart from worry

Thanks for the advice
this I scwhat I was thinking and you’ve just confirmed it
I’ll just focus on enjoying her and telling her I love her and will work on resilience
as I do need to build this I agree
any particular tips for this ?

My dad is dying right now, he has a terminal illness and only a few weeks / maybe couple of months left.

My mum died suddenly, and unexpectedly when I was just 19.

My stepdad died 5 years ago from terminal cancer.

Soon I will have only a stepmum left.

You can and will cope when your mum eventually does die. It will be upsetting and will change you, but you will be ok.

My experience has taught me that if you get a chance to say goodbyes ( like I did for my stepdad and will soon for my dad) that the focus for the person is on worrying about those that they leave behind.
What they actually need is reassurance, thanks and to be told it's ok to go when they are ready to go. They need to be allowed to slip away peacefully and with no stress.

My tips would be to know what you need to do when she does die. Know what her wishes are with regards to a funeral so you can do it all just as she'd want, make sure you know where her will is kept, think about how you will cope emotionally - do you have family or friends to share your grief with, would counselling be helpful.

Right now try to focus on the good she brings to your life rather than worrying about the future, have at least one thing you enjoy doing and do it regularly, think positively about the things you have done in your life no matter how large or small, have plans/hopes/dreams and things to look forward to in the future no matter how large or small, find things that help you relax/calm you - reading/having a bath/walking/your favourite film and finally spend time with your mum asking her/telling her everything you want to - just phrase everything in a positive way.

I wouldn't tell her and I say that because I did tell my Mum. I had a bit of a breakdown because we've had an awful couple of years and I've not been happy in my marriage (although things are much better now as we've had counselling) and I felt very emotionally unsafe with my husband for a while. I had high anxiety (now medicated) and told her through floods of tears that i was terrified of my parents dying as I wouldn't feel safe anymore. I feel awful for telling her that and putting that burden on them.

This has made me well up. It’s so beautifully put and it’s reminded me to be stronger.

I feel if u have a gd relationship and re very close then she will already know.

I'd be absolutely devastated to lose my mum and I'm sure she knows that already.

Tell your Mum you love her and are really grateful for how supportive you are.