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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you feel secure in Britain?

98 replies

Gettingeverybuggoing · 14/12/2022 19:53

I’m British, but live abroad in another European country. We’ve discussed coming back for a couple of years now. It’s beautiful where we live, lifestyle, weather etc, but I often don’t feel secure/stable financially. We earn ok and have a nice life, but there’s that fear if it goes wrong…there’s not the same benefits system as in England (you have to be v v low income to receive any help at all)
I want to be able to sort proper private pensions for us and a savings account for Dd etc. We currently own a home and have a small mortgage and have always paid into the system, but I’d like to feel more secure.
People now tell me it isn’t secure at all and we’re better off where we are, pre covid they used to say to come back or they’d have fair arguments for both places, it now seems to be as though we are mad for considering it.
Do you feel secure and stable financially etc or isn’t it like that anymore?

OP posts:
Original poster
Gettingeverybuggoing · 14/12/2022 20:06

Guessing people do 🤔

OP posts:
Flamingogirl08 · 14/12/2022 20:18

I do

Pothoswithasparkle · 14/12/2022 20:21

Not really so I am in process of emigrating. Again. I wasn't born here.
It went massively downhill in last 10 years and I don't see it getting much better sadly.
I checked what I would get as childfree homeowner and it's very little so not really a safety net as some think I guess.

ZenNudist · 14/12/2022 20:21

More secure here than abroad. As a UK citizen I have healthcare pension and id never rely on UC anyway.

Original poster
Gettingeverybuggoing · 14/12/2022 20:51

@ZenNudist What do you mean healthcare pension?

OP posts:
RambamThankyouMam · 14/12/2022 20:53

I'm Jewish so no. Never feel safe anywhere.

MissWired · 14/12/2022 21:01

No. It will only get worse in the coming years so I am writing off my pension (highly doubt anyone will be paid a state pension here in thirty years time in any case) and emigrating to my mother's country in eighteen months time.

I feel so sorry for people who are unable to escape.

33goingon64 · 14/12/2022 21:01

Not anymore, sadly. Our pride and joy, the NHS, has been left to rot and that terrifies me. Not just for me but for a civilised society. Our democracy is being nibbled away by quasi fascist politicians. And they're screwing the environment by dumping sewage in rivers and seas.

JamSandle · 14/12/2022 21:02

Yes I do.

PollyPaintsFlowers · 14/12/2022 21:04

No. I'm severely disabled and I think the government would be happier if I just killed myself off quietly, failing that they'll do it via the benefit system and the NHS

Original poster
Gettingeverybuggoing · 14/12/2022 21:04

@MissWired So you wouldn’t return if you were us? I always saw it as my safe haven to return to, now I feel a bit scared

OP posts:
Annabel073 · 14/12/2022 21:09

Yes, very financially secure. It was our main reason for returning but our quality of life vastly surpasses what we experienced in any other country we've lived in, as does our earning potential.

MissWired · 14/12/2022 21:11

Gettingeverybuggoing · 14/12/2022 21:04

@MissWired So you wouldn’t return if you were us? I always saw it as my safe haven to return to, now I feel a bit scared

I have just advised my brother not to return to the UK after many years of him living in Europe. Fortunately he has listened. I know several people who are emigrating - every single one of them can see the future of this country and it is not going to be pretty.

Unless you are one of the super-rich and can afford to live in a gated community with security, I would steer well clear.

Tinkerbyebye · 14/12/2022 21:11

Yes

Suboptimalsitch · 14/12/2022 21:15

I was born here and have lived in the same county all my life. I’ve never felt more despondent at the state of the UK. It’s just so depressing and I’ve seen my area become more and more unsafe over the last 5 years, with drug dealing in the daytime, break-ins, vandalism, racist attacks and other shit. I’m also Jewish and am aware of increased attacks on the Jewish community which is scary. I wish I could emigrate but can’t afford healthcare in another country. I’m retired, on a small fixed income and have very little left after outgoings. I really don’t enjoy living here at all but can’t leave. I can’t see anything improving here for the foreseeable future either.

I see your point about the welfare state here but the NHS is as you know is broken and you can be waiting for appointments, referrals for months on end and may or may not be able to find an NHS dentist. Apart from my most well off friends, everyone is working their way through any savings they had managed to save. I doubt I will have any of the money I saved for my retirement left by the time my state pension comes through . The government has done an excellent job of lowering our standard of living, our medical care, our transport system, education system, the legal aid system, our industry, our standing economically and politically in the world. Brexit was the disaster many predicted. I would think very carefully and do a lot of research before making a decision to return.

Sigma33 · 14/12/2022 21:16

I returned 3 years ago. Not 'super rich' and don't live in a gated community 😂 just a normal suburban semi and feel safe. DD (15) gets to school and dance classes by herself on public transport with no trouble.

There are good and bad areas anywhere, but some people will always see the worst and think it is typical rather than just - unusually bad.

Busytimes · 14/12/2022 21:19

Yes .
also my disabled uoung. Reltive. Is well supported by the benefits. System. She could
work . Chooses not to . Shops in m ans s . Has weekly massage for pain . Has nice life . Nice mobolity car . She is secure amd has a good lifetyle. Society is judges by how it treats thw vulnerable and she. Has a good life . She does not have to pay bedroom tax etc . Lives in a home with additional bedrooms etc

Bluerisotto · 14/12/2022 21:20

I returned 10+ years ago and am glad I did as I was able to buy a house and get a decent pension sorted here. Neither of which would have been possible where I was living before.
If I was making the choice now, I would still leave where I was but I might choose somewhere different. However I am not sure how things are in other countries at the moment...many European countries are also in a cost of living and energy crisis. I have just had the option to move to Australia, but have turned it down because I don't want to compromise what I have here, so I guess I do still feel safe in the UK.

StressedOutMama7808 · 14/12/2022 21:26

I mean we are financially stable but I do think we would be much better off abroad.

I work as a teacher and the perks are very attractive in the Middle East.

If it wasn't for DH I would move in a heart beat.

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 14/12/2022 21:28

I had to give up work because my DS has SEND, financially we are ok we get DLA, some UC top up and i get carers allowance which helps make up a little of my wages whilst DP works fulltime. DS is well supported medically and my children go to a good school. I feel safe in my area and will happily walk to town anytime of the day. We are not rich and certainly dont or feel like we need to live in a gated community with security.

Whilst the UK has its problems i still feel like its a safe place to live.

IntentionalError · 14/12/2022 21:38

The biggest problem in the U.K is that the NHS, including GP services & social care, is completely dysfunctional, broken & failing. Most of the blame for this obviously lies with the Tories who have been in government for the last 12 years, but it’s not all about funding.
There is an obvious need for fundamental structural reforms, but no politicians of any party are brave enough to admit this, never mind actually doing anything about it. We should be looking at the mixed public / private healthcare systems with universal insurance provision & competing providers in countries like Israel & Germany and learning from them, but that is politically impossible so we are fucked.

Balaya · 14/12/2022 21:57

I do yes. But I'm not sure how it helps you?

Surely you need to balance up the country you are in now with the UK in terms of earnings and job opportunities v. cost of living.

To be secure you really need to earn enough to make your own security by paying off mortgage, getting a pension and some money for private healthcare for things that wouldn't be swift on the NHS.

So can you do that in your current country, or would it be easier here?

In terms of everything going tits up there are a huge number of jobs available here at the moment, there is no need to be unemployed if you're able to work. Obviously not ideal but you can earn whilst you look for the right job. If you were unable to work the benefits system sounds better than what is available where you are now.

IhearyouClemFandango · 14/12/2022 21:57

I do.

vincettenoir · 14/12/2022 22:00

It’s depressing living in a country where things have been getting worse since at least 2008.

Cornelious · 14/12/2022 22:04

I feel safe and secure. We're financially stable, have good jobs, dc are happy. It helps if you have money.

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