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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you feel secure in Britain?

98 replies

Gettingeverybuggoing · 14/12/2022 19:53

I’m British, but live abroad in another European country. We’ve discussed coming back for a couple of years now. It’s beautiful where we live, lifestyle, weather etc, but I often don’t feel secure/stable financially. We earn ok and have a nice life, but there’s that fear if it goes wrong…there’s not the same benefits system as in England (you have to be v v low income to receive any help at all)
I want to be able to sort proper private pensions for us and a savings account for Dd etc. We currently own a home and have a small mortgage and have always paid into the system, but I’d like to feel more secure.
People now tell me it isn’t secure at all and we’re better off where we are, pre covid they used to say to come back or they’d have fair arguments for both places, it now seems to be as though we are mad for considering it.
Do you feel secure and stable financially etc or isn’t it like that anymore?

OP posts:
Fairyliz · 20/12/2022 07:04

RambamThankyouMam · 14/12/2022 20:53

I'm Jewish so no. Never feel safe anywhere.

That is so sad I am so sorry.

Alumpyreflection · 20/12/2022 07:12

I think it depends where you are in the UK. I live in a lovely village where properties are affordable and where community spirit is high. If everything did go splat, there is the safety net of a benefits system. Yes, plenty of public services are creaking but having travelled and seen how non existent such provisions are in other parts of the world, I feel safe and happy here.

curiouslycinnamon · 20/12/2022 07:12

I feel secure right now, but I do worry about the future and the way things are going. However, I don't know if this is better in any other European countries over the long term. I think it will be difficult in most places over the next 30-40 years.

Alumpyreflection · 20/12/2022 07:19

Lots of people are saying 'the NHS is completely broken' but I think this is not true across the whole of the UK. It's under a great deal of pressure but emergency care is still fantastic and in my area, thanks to a fabulous GP's service, I can still get same-day appointments.

Both my parents have struggled with serious heart issues and their care from the NHS has been beyond brilliant. On one occasion recently my dad had an ambulance within 15 minutes and after being treated in A&E, they'd found a CCU bed before you could blink. Not a situation anyone wants to be in but life threatening emergency care is great in this area. 'Things that can wait'...well, that's a different story! But I have an optimistic approach to life and believe there are enough good people within the NHS to be able to turn the creaking ship around.

UseOfWeapons · 20/12/2022 07:25

Yes, I do feel secure. I’ve lived in 2 other European countries, and have something to compare it with. UK might not be brilliant with many things, but I’d rather be here than anywhere else, despite it’s problems.

BadShepherd · 20/12/2022 07:28

Yes, very secure. I moved back to the UK a decade ago and was better off than I’d been abroad even though I’d had a “high-flying” job.

All I can offer is that you must choose very carefully where you live. Schools and NHS are not dire nationwide.

The country I left is suffering inflation nearly 2X ours and my previous colleagues are not happy.

AreOttersJustWetCats · 20/12/2022 07:28

Financially I feel secure, but in other aspects increasingly less so. NHS dental care is basically non-existent, and NHS healthcare provision is getting worse. Council services have been run into the ground by underfunding. What's stopping you from saving and paying into a private pension where you are?

Figgypudding123 · 20/12/2022 08:22

Feel much less secure over past 10 years. NHS is dying on its arse. Pay has not kept pace with inflation. No safety net in terms of benefits system. Have a disabled son who may never be able to manage full-time work and I'm scared witless about his future.

silentpool · 20/12/2022 08:24

I didn't feel secure in London, never felt like I was getting anywhere with the low wages and high cost of living. So I returned to Australia and feel much better.

Ivyonafence · 20/12/2022 08:27

RambamThankyouMam · 14/12/2022 20:53

I'm Jewish so no. Never feel safe anywhere.

Thats heartbreaking I'm so sorry

AfricanAmericanFriday · 20/12/2022 08:42

Unless you are one of the super-rich and can afford to live in a gated community with security, I would steer well clear.
Surely, you must be talking about South Africa or Venezuela..

OoooohBobMonkhouse · 20/12/2022 08:47

AfricanAmericanFriday · 20/12/2022 08:42

Unless you are one of the super-rich and can afford to live in a gated community with security, I would steer well clear.
Surely, you must be talking about South Africa or Venezuela..

I know it's a crackers comment and makes you wonder if that poster has ever stepped foot in the UK.

xogossipgirlxo · 20/12/2022 09:08

Honestly? No. But I guess it'll change once our household income will increase. I don't rely on state in terms of pension, benefits etc., as it will never be enough. I wouldn't feel secure in my home country either, so I don't blame UK. I just work on my situation to make it better.

TintinHadToBeMale · 20/12/2022 10:46

OoooohBobMonkhouse · 20/12/2022 08:47

I know it's a crackers comment and makes you wonder if that poster has ever stepped foot in the UK.

Show quote history

We should not have to compare to places that have no law and order whatsoever. We want and had a functioning civil society with no weapons being carried. That trolls pop up and increasingly tell us to compare to some of the worst places on the planet tells you something about what Britain is like op.

Those of us who were not born to wealth often find ourselves living in areas dominated by the drug trades. There is little control over feral youngsters, who increasingly fall prey to said gangs. It is harder and harder to move on out of such places, as work doesn’t pay, and we are over populated anyway. Britain is now a land of very divided experiences.

SleeplessInEngland · 20/12/2022 10:50

I've never lived anywhere else long enough to compare, but I do feel like the NHS will be severely diminished by the time I'm old enough to likely depend on it. Not to mention the care sector will probably never, ever be fixed.

meatyryvita · 20/12/2022 10:53

RambamThankyouMam · 14/12/2022 20:53

I'm Jewish so no. Never feel safe anywhere.

I couldn't imagine dealing with that kind of concern on a daily basis - I'm so sorry that this is your experience.

RoseOud · 20/12/2022 10:57

Yes I do. I've been disabled for a long time. Did work for a time in my younger days until they retired me on medical grounds.

I have had many operations and ongoing appointments to do with my condition,but have always felt I have had the best of the NHS.

I live fairly comfortably on a pension and some benefits. As bad as what things seem now in this country I still wouldn't want to live anywhere else.

Onnabugeisha · 20/12/2022 11:00

I feel less safe and less secure here in the U.K. than I used to. The various economic crises of Brexit, Covid and now COL are seriously pushing millions into poverty. With poverty comes increased crime and violence. Potentially civil unrest. I was in London during the 2011 riots and can see more of that happening in our near future.

But that said, the U.K. is still a very safe place to live on a global scale. Currently it is still much safer and more secure than my DH’s home country which is the USA. The USA is richer than the U.K. but has higher wealth and income inequality, less police presence and gun culture.

So I think that everyone should assess where they are and where they could get a visa and see where the chips fall for them. There’s no one right answer to this imho.

Davros · 20/12/2022 11:08

I'm Jewish so no. Never feel safe anywhere.
I'm sorry you feel like that. DH is Jewish and I don't think he, or his wider family, feel like this. I have lots of Jewish friends too (being in North London) and I've never heard any of them say this either.
I've lived in London all my life, in various areas ranging from grotty to posh. I've never been the victim of crime here (once in Italy though) and I've only ever witnessed one crime (bag snatch). I haven't lived a sheltered life, especially when I was younger when we were fearless, and I get out and about a good bit as do all my friends and family. I didn't even know we had "gated communities"! The NHS has largely been brilliant for me and my wider family. It falls down sometimes on the admin but that's improved with technology.

Hbh17 · 20/12/2022 11:15

Of course. We are a stable democracy with a solid financial system, ample job opportunities and a welfare state. I'm not sure what else you would expect?

Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 16:56

red4321 · 20/12/2022 07:02

Unless you are one of the super-rich and can afford to live in a gated community with security, I would steer well clear.

I don't recognise this. Crime is relatively low in the U.K. compared to other countries (particularly the US). That description is true in South Africa but in the U.K.?

I live near London and have never felt unsafe walking round different areas, nor have I ever been a victim of crime there.

There may be plenty that people don't like about the U.K., but needing to live in a gated community with security isn't a fair reflection. Particularly if you've ever visited somewhere like Cape Town or Johannesburg and you see what living in fear of serious crime looks like.

And a day later you were burgled according to another thread

Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 16:56

But in answer to the OP

yes I do feel safe in Britain

red4321 · 28/12/2022 17:02

And a day later you were burgled according to another thread

Thanks so much for bringing that up, glad my loss has been used to point score. Pretty low to search :my other posts for that.

But, since you did, yes I still feel safe and it's incomparable to the situation in places like South Africa. I've been burgled once in nearly 45 years and not suffered any other crimes. That's not too bad.

Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 17:04

red4321 · 28/12/2022 17:02

And a day later you were burgled according to another thread

Thanks so much for bringing that up, glad my loss has been used to point score. Pretty low to search :my other posts for that.

But, since you did, yes I still feel safe and it's incomparable to the situation in places like South Africa. I've been burgled once in nearly 45 years and not suffered any other crimes. That's not too bad.

Not a point score. I am sorry you were burgled, especially a day after posting how you’d never been a victim of crime

Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 17:05

No searching your name.

you don’t think this thread relevant to the other at all?

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